“Do you have cigarettes?” He nods, pulling a box out of his pocket.
“Do you want one?”
“Yeah. Will you join me for a smoke?”
“Of course.” He nods.
We pass through the candlelit room to go to the balcony on that side. I barely set foot out there before I’m remembering the time Raquel left me turned on in this very place. So much has happened since that night.
We light our cigarettes. I take a puff and blow the smoke out into the cool night air. Marco rests his forearms on the balcony railing and focuses on the view. Silence is rare between us; it’s awkward, but the conversation that’s coming is one we both know we should be having.
“There is no need to beat around the bush between us,” he says casually.
“This is not a game to me, Marco,” I begin, inhaling again. “Not this time.”
“Do you really like her?”
“It’s more than that,” I answer.
He bursts out laughing.
“Don’t fuck with me. Are you in love?”
“Yes.”
He grimaces. “I thought she was just the weird girl who stalked you, how things change.”
“Marco, I’m serious, she’s not a game to me,” I repeat. “No games, no bets, no challenges.”
He raises both hands in the air.
“Oh, I got it,” he says with a mocking tone.
“Say what you have to say.”
“Am I supposed to listen to you? Did you care when you screwed things up for me with Samantha?”
“You never told me you really liked her; that it wasn’t a game. How was I supposed to know? By reading your mind?”
“You knew how I felt about her! It shouldn’t have been necessary to tell you. I’ve had feelings for her ever since we were little, and you knew it.”
I knew this would come out someday, but I didn’t expect to have this conversation today.
“I can’t control her feelings. That’s not on me.”
“But any hope I had with her went to shit when you started fucking her for pleasure, for fun, fooling her.”
I put the cigarette out in an ashtray.
“I never wanted to play with her, and you know it.”
“But you did,” he replies. The anger in his voice is clear. “You screwed us both with your damn selfishness. You never think of others. Only about yourself.”
“What do you want? An apology?”
“Nah, I just hope that now that you’ve found someone you really care about, you’ll learn. I just hope you grow up. How would you feel if I took Raquel away from you? Imagine watching me use her for pleasure, knowing that you’re there feeling a thousand things for her.”
Just thinking about it, I clench my hands at my sides.
“Don’t even think about it.”
“It feels horrible, doesn’t it? I’m glad you can put yourself in my shoes now.” He turns his back to me, and sighs. “Relax, I’m not going anywhere near your witch, I just wanted you to understand how I felt.”
Swallowing my pride, I speak.
“I’m sorry.”
Marco looks at me again, surprise clear on his face, but I continue.
“I’m really sorry, bro. You’re right.”
“You’ve never apologized to me.”
“I know,” I sigh. “But now it’s easier to admit my mistakes. I think she makes me a better person.”
“I’m glad to hear that.”
“And Samy will heal, Marco, and you’ll have the chance to win her back.”
He bursts out laughing.
“I hope so. For now, I’ll settle for her glares.”
“So, we’re good?” I ask.
“We’re good.”
With everything clear, we both walk back into the club. When we get to the table, Raquel is laughing out loud with Gregory, and Samantha is standing with Andrea, dancing a little to the music. Apolo and Daniela are on the dance floor, doing some crazy moves.
I move closer to Samantha to whisper in her ear: “I dare you to dance with Marco.”
She pouts. “I hate your challenges.”
But she does it. We’ve always done the challenges we set for ourselves. I watch them go to dance, and my eyes fall on my witch. She looks so beautiful laughing. Her cheeks are flushed; I’ve noticed her face turns red when she’s had too much to drink. She notices my presence and her eyes light up, and she raises her hand, beckoning me to her.
Yes, definitely, being destroyed by her is a privilege.
FORTY-FOUR
The Walk Of Shame
- RAQUEL -
“Raquel.” Someone is shaking my shoulder. “Raquel!”
Being violently shaken brings me from the world of unconsciousness back to life.
“Raquel!” A demanding whisper reaches my ears, but I don’t want to open my eyes. “For God’s sake, wake up!”
I open one of my eyes, closing the other as I get used to the light. A figure is leaning over me.
“What—”
A hand covers my mouth and I slowly blink, trying to see who is almost on top of me.
Black hair falling across her face . . .
Dani.
“Shhh! I need you to get up very carefully,” she whispers.
I give her a what-the-fuck-is-going-on look, even though she looks desperate.
“I’ll explain later, but I need you to get up carefully, and be quiet.”
“Wait a second. First of all, where the fuck are we?”
Last night . . .
My mind flashes through a series of images that are too embarrassing to recall in full: margaritas, vodka, dancing on top of the club table, Gregory stripping, Ares and I kissing in front of everyone, and Dani and Apolo giving each other be-careful-or-else-I-will-fuck-you-tonight glances.
Oh, Virgin of Abs, I’m going to hell.
Basically, I committed too many sins in one night. And not only that, we had to take a taxi to Marco’s house because his was the only house without adult supervision. More alcohol, more stripper shows, more smoldering looks between Apolo and Dani, and even more kisses between me and Ares.
Dani releases my mouth and I sit up. My stomach churns and my head throbs.
“What’s wrong?” My throat burns, dry from so much alcohol.
Dani raises her index finger to her lips and gestures to my side. Ares is sleeping next to me, lying on his stomach, his head facing away from us. The sheet is pulled up to a little above his waist. He’s shirtless, his tattoos visible, and his messy black hair points everywhere.
God, waking up next to this man is a privilege. I may be spending all the happiness of my life with this guy, but it’s worth it.
Dani brings me back to reality, shaking her hand in front of my face.
Carefully, I stand up. The mattress creaks and we both look at the Greek god, but he is in the afterworld. I get a little dizzy, and Dani holds me up, waiting for me to steady myself.
I won’t ever drink again.
I know, I said that last time. Alcohol is like an ex you haven’t gotten over. You promise not to fall again, never to try it again, but it seduces you, and you end up back where you started.
I look for the shoes I was wearing last night. They’re lying in the corner of the room, and a memory comes to mind: “Spell me, Witch!” Ares shouts as we awkwardly enter the room. He grabs me by the waist to kiss me lightly. I let out a chuckle.
“You are so drunk.”
He looks so cute with his red cheeks and narrowed eyes. Ares points his finger at me.
“You aren’t the embodiment of sobriety either.”
“Wow. . . . Embodiment. How does your intoxicated brain manage to say words like that?” Ares gives me a big smile, touching his forehead.
“My IQ is . . .”
“The highest in the county,” I finish for him. “Smart and handsome. Why are you so perfect?”
He shrugs and caresses my cheek.
“Why are you so perfect?”
And I remember in detail everything we did after that. God.
“Earth calling Raquel!”
With blood rushing to my cheeks, I snap back to reality. Dani gestures with her hand for me to follow her to the door, and I shake my head.
“I can’t just walk away and leave him like this.”
“You can explain everything later in a text message!” Dani whispers. “I need to get out of here.”
“Don’t you think he’ll feel a little used?”
Dani gives me an are-you-serious look.
“You’ll explain later, let’s go.” When I hesitate, she begs, “Please.”