Kathryn’s assistant also includes a schedule in the package for the day of the screen test, which I have also never seen. For the first time, I find out that the call time for Monday is ten a.m. for hair and makeup, to start filming at noon. If I hadn’t just received this package I would have had no idea what scenes to prepare or when to arrive on Monday morning.
I’ve been deluding myself up until now; it’s not a coincidence that my most important emails are somehow not getting to me. I think of Cynthia’s unusually urgent confirmation email and wonder if perhaps it wasn’t her first attempt at getting through to me.
Without a thought I get up, walk straight out to my apartment hallway, and depress the door handle. It’s locked, as it should be. I shake my head at the thought but for a second there it seemed entirely possible that the apartment door lock as well as the security monitor might have been deliberately tampered with.
But nobody would be able to get into the apartment while I was out; they wouldn’t even let a courier upstairs just now. I must be having a problem with my server? Or could someone be accessing my email remotely?—but all my emails come direct to my mail app. I’m obviously no computer expert but other than a run-of-the-mill server problem, I can’t think of another rational reason I haven’t been getting emails.
Then it hits me. My computer isn’t necessarily the issue here; you can access emails via your phone too. I head back into the kitchen where it sits innocently on the countertop and try to remember if I left it unattended at any point today around Joanne. But my phone is password-protected, there’s no way she’d be able to open it even if she wanted to. Could it be that in the general chaos I somehow accidentally deleted my own emails? Not such a crazy thought given that I am apparently the only person other than cleaning staff who can get into this apartment. Am I getting so distracted I’m making these stupid mistakes or am I missing something? Either way I might have almost lost the most important job of my life.
I shake off all thoughts of Joanne, Emily, and emails and pull out the new script pages to take a look. It takes a moment to refocus before my work-brain kicks in. Thankfully the scenes they want me to do are the ones I half expected, and the dialogue has changed only slightly from the previous draft of the script.
There are three scenes to learn, and I have only one full day to prepare. It should be enough if I focus but I’ll need to get my head straight and back in the game.
I look at the oven clock. It’s too late to start learning lines tonight. Besides, I need to work out what the hell I’m going to say to the police tomorrow about the whole Joanne/Emily situation. I wonder for a second if I can delay going into the station—after all, this audition on Monday could change my life. But then I don’t think I could live with the idea of Emily not getting the help she might need. Besides, if I report it early tomorrow, I can put it to bed once and for all and have the rest of the day to focus on the script. Which gives me tonight to find out as much as I can about Emily’s disappearance.
My eyes stray back to the open laptop on the coffee table as I feel myself being dragged back into Emily’s life.
I head over to the open laptop and skim through the messages.
Marla left Emily at a New Year’s Eve party and didn’t hear from her properly for the next two days.
I pick up where I left off.
Sun Jan 3, 8:04am
Can you meet me at the coffee shop?
I can be there in 30 minutes?
Thank you x
Then nothing until that night.
Sun Jan 3, 7:21pm
For the record I say do what your heart tells you. This is your life, your choices.
But please be careful & call me straight after. I’m here if you need to vent. Anytime!
Thanks. You’re a good friend, so, thank you. God, I wish we’d met in high school! I know this is the right way to do it…at least for me. It’s their mess, they can fucking fix it.
Mon Jan 4, 2:15pm
I’m here. Nervous.
Shit, okay. Don’t be nervous! You’ve got this. You know what to say, you’ve covered everything.
Em, you know you don’t have to do this right?
I do.
I want to do this.
Mon Jan 4, 2:45pm
Done. It’s an offer. And I have everything they just said on my phone.
My eyes snap to Emily’s mobile phone on the table beside me but there’s no way I can open it.
I read on.
Okay. Is that admissible?
Let me know when you are safe home.
Home. Wow. Holy shit. I don’t know if it’s admissible but it’s enough, if you know what I mean. I actually feel better! I was scared I wouldn’t but I do. I think this is going to work.
Fucking hell you’ve got balls!
How were they?
They were weirdly businesslike. They listened, then they had a discussion, and then they made an offer.
What did they offer?
They gave me three options. I’ll tell you this evening. But they’re good. If it works then in a way it’ll all have been worth it.
Worth it?
Well…not for nothing.
Tues Jan 5, 10:08am
Just got a call. They’re pulling out.
Do they know you have the last meeting on your phone?
No.
Tell them
Tues Jan 5, 10:22am
It worked. They’re consulting legal.
Tues Jan 5, 12:09pm
It’s back on. They want me to go in again tomorrow and sign an NDA, then they’ll sign the contract.
What time tomorrow? Should I come with you?
I’ll be fine. It’s at the studio. 9am.
You’re keeping the recordings until the deal’s done, right?
Of course.
Weds Jan 6, 8:42am
I hope you don’t think the worse of me for any of this. I know I should be doing this differently. I know it’s not the right way but, as messed up as it is, this might be my only chance. I know I’m good enough and if something can come of all this then why not take it with both hands? Life’s hard enough you’ve got to catch breaks wherever you find them, right? xxx
I’m behind you whatever. Don’t worry about what anyone else thinks. Just look after yourself, Em. At the end of the day, if no one else is paying your rent no one else gets a say!
And be careful today—they’re clearly capable of anything. Call me after.
Weds Jan 6, 10:05am
How did it go?
Weds Jan 6, 11:01am
Em? How did it go?
Weds Jan 6, 11:46am
Let me know you’re okay.
Weds Jan 6, 12:07pm
Right, I’m coming over
Weds Jan 6, 12:42pm
Where are you?
Weds Jan 6, 1:39pm
Em, where are you? I need you to call me asap. Just let me know you’re okay? xx
Thurs Jan 7, 5:04pm
Got your Airbnb woman to let me in. I know where you are now. Just stay there. I’m coming. Wait for me. Please don’t do anything xx
I try to scroll down but that’s where the messages end. There have been no more messages to or from Marla since the seventh of January.
I stare at Marla’s final message to Emily. God knows how she worked out where Emily went. But it occurs to me there’s a chance that Emily may have gone back to wherever it was now.
I suddenly have the overwhelming desire to dial Marla’s number and ask her if she found Emily. I take her number from Emily’s screen and add it into my phone.
And at the risk of her thinking I’m completely insane, I tap out a message and press send before I change my mind.
Today, 11:15pm
Hi Marla, my name is Mia, you don’t know me but I got your number from Emily. I know this is a weird question but do you know where she is? She went missing on Wednesday. I’m pretty concerned.
I reread the words I’ve just sent out into the ether and wonder if I’ve made a terrible mistake. Because they haven’t messaged each other since January, I’m guessing that Marla will have no idea Emily is missing again. I find myself asking why they have stopped talking to each other but then I realize there’s no way to know if Marla didn’t disappear that day as well. The fact that I can’t open up Emily’s phone and check if the two called each other is beyond infuriating.