“What’s the Grotto?”
Lu and Judd look to Slade, as if they don’t know how to answer. I thought this would be an easy question, but considering the hesitation that’s settled in the room, I guess I was wrong. The first drip of anxiety filters into my stomach, which is the last thing I want. Turning my head, I look up at Slade.
I finally get a chance to get a really good look at him, and what I see makes even more of those worried droplets fall down. He has circles under his eyes, and his five o’clock shadow has turned into the start of a thick beard. There’s tension held at his brow that he can’t hide from me, and he’s still wearing his wrinkled, gold-splotched clothes.
His eyes soften as he watches me. “The Grotto is our home in Drollard Village.”
“Okay...and where’s Drollard Village? Are we still in Fifth Kingdom?”
Judd grins and chucks his hands behind his head as he stretches his legs out in front of him. “That’s an interesting question. See, because it was Fifth Kingdom, but now it’s not. And technically, Drollard Village doesn’t exist. Neither do the people who live here.”
My mind swims. “Um. What?”
Slade shoots him an impatient look before turning his attention back onto me. “We’ll explain all of that later. How are you feeling?”
That’s not what I want to talk about. Not at all.
Ignoring his question, I shove the blankets that are still wrapped around me. Now that I’m awake, it’s sweltering under all these layers. When Slade loosens his hold enough for me to do that, I take the opportunity to stand. My bare feet sink into the soft fur rug as I pad across the room to the window. I look out, squinting at the swirl of glowing blue. “What is that? It’s almost like we’re—”
“In a house built inside a cave? Yep, we are,” Lu tells me.
“And it glows,” Judd pipes in.
My brows lift up in surprise. “Wow. It’s pretty.”
“Auren?” Slade calls my name tentatively, but it makes the skin around my eyes go tight.
Instead of answering him, I look back to Judd. He seems like a safe bet. “What kinds of card games have you been playing?”
I can tell that he sees right through me, especially when his eyes dart over to Slade for a split second before he answers me. Still, he plays along. “Oh, you don’t want to know, Gildy. Lu cheats.”
“I do not!” she says with outrage. “It’s not my fault you can’t hold your wine while we’re playing, and you make awful bets.”
He rolls his eyes. “See? Mean.”
A little laugh escapes me, but that quickly gets washed away when I hear, “Auren.”
I paste on a smile and turn to face Slade, but my stomach churns when he slowly stands up. “Yes?”
“I asked how you’re feeling,” he says carefully, his eyes the color of summer grasslands.
I can feel Judd and Lu staring at me, and my face goes hot.
“I’m fine.”
Seconds go by. Time’s pendulum swings like a spectator, eyes ticking from Slade to me as we watch each other.
He wants to talk. I can see the agonized words held back in his mouth. I can see the emotions he’s ready to face. But when I snapped back into consciousness in that other cave, those very emotions were too consuming. The memories too raw. I didn’t shove up walls only for my gold and my fae nature. I barricaded everything else too.
“I’m not ready.”
My lips are protective over that truth, pursing together defensively as soon as I’ve said it. I’m not ready. I can’t go there. Because if I go there, then I’ll have to think and process and feel. I don’t want to feel yet. The clock can count down all it wants, but I’m still not going to give in.
It’s apparent that Slade doesn’t want to give in either, but I get saved from whatever response he was going to say when a man walks in through the front door. A man who looks just like Slade.
Fake Rip.
CHAPTER 15
AUREN
It’s only the second time I’ve seen him without the concealing armor and helmet he always wore when he pretended to be Rip. It’s a bit jarring. He looks so much like Slade that I can’t help but stare, trying to pick out the small discrepancies.
He comes in carrying a wooden crate that looks to be overflowing with sacks, bottles, and root vegetables poking out of the top. He stops just inside the room, taking in the silence before his eyes land on me. “Good to see you without the puddle underneath you.”
I blink.
Did he just say I peed myself?
I look around to see if Judd is smirking. He seems like he’d laugh if I’d peed myself. Only, there’s no smile to be found. Hopefully that’s a good sign.
“Excuse me?” I ask.
“Your gold,” he says slowly. “When you started to come to, it was leaking out of you all over the place.”
Oh.
An awkwardness descends, because I have to go from possibly peeing myself to realizing that he’s talking about my power so openly. The fact that he just casually mentioned seeing gold stream out of me is more than a little disconcerting, and I can’t quite wrap my head around this new version of normalcy. It’s become second nature for me to hide my power, to hide from touch, so this feels almost…wrong.
“Sorry about that,” I say awkwardly. Then I squirm on my feet. “Umm, since we’re on the topic, where’s the washroom?”
He frowns. “We were on that topic?”
I feel heat flood my cheeks. “Oh. Nope. No, we weren’t,” I blurt before I look over to Lu, hoping she’ll take pity on me. “Washroom?”
“Come on, Gildy,” she says, unfolding herself to lead me out of the room. Her slippers really are very large and furry. I’m surprised she’s still so light of foot with those on.
I follow her as she takes me to a door down the hall. “This is my room, the washroom is right through there, and grab some clean clothes from my closet too—I set a pile aside for you.”
With a nod of thanks, I quickly go inside, do my business, and wash up as best I can. Then I take off my ruined, gold-splotched clothes, feeling like they dried with paint splattered all over them. Though as soon as I drag the shirt off my back, I freeze at a sharp stab of pain that shoots down my spine.
I stop.
Suck in a breath.
And I slam walls up so fast that I make my own mind spin.
I’m not going there. I’m not.
With determination as strong as steel, I carefully pick up an oversized shirt and slip it on and then drag on a new pair of leggings. All while I breathe through braced lungs, fortifying my mental walls.
With one last breath, I force myself to unclench my teeth, to relax my arms at my sides. When I’ve secured myself, I head out, going back into the main living room. As soon as I do, everyone’s murmured voices go quiet as they all turn to me.
“Better?” Lu asks from her spot on the sofa next to Judd.
“Much,” I reply, hovering in the doorway. Everyone in the room is stilted in silence, and I don’t miss the way they keep shooting questioning looks at Slade.
“Okay...” his brother drawls out, shifting on his feet before he glances at the others. “Well. Like I was saying, I went to the Cellar for supplies because I know none of you had dinner. But it’s not my turn to cook, so one of you assholes can do it this time.”
Judd gets up from the sofa to take over the duty, but I rush forward, beating him to it. “I’ll do it!”
Everyone looks at me, but I pretend not to see as I head for the open doorway.
“I didn’t mean you,” Fake Rip says.
“I’m hungry, and I want to help,” I call over my shoulder.