Rissa looks stricken.
“That’s right,” Polly pounces, peeled finger pointed at her face. “That’s what you’re not getting, what you haven’t understood through this entire Divine-forsaken trip. You didn’t rescue me. I was happy there.”
“You were high!”
“So? I liked it. I liked the way it made me feel. And it was my choice.”
Anger flashes through Rissa’s eyes. “I wasn’t just going to leave you there to drug yourself to death!”
“I wasn’t going to,” Polly snaps. “Not that you’d believe me. But you know the difference between you and me? All those times you talked about buying out your contract? You never once noticed I didn’t want that. You thought that everyone—me included—wanted out as much as you did, but you were wrong.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I like being a saddle, Rissa. You were the only one that started to hate it. But guess what. We might look alike, but we don’t think alike. Because I’m a damn good saddle, and I want to keep doing it. I like being desired. I like the power sex gives me. Being a royal saddle was the best position I could hope for, and you dragged me out of there without my consent. So I am done.”
The jolted tangle of silence that quakes between them has my eyes darting left and right. I feel entirely out of place hearing this, so I do my best not to make any noise at all.
After a moment, Rissa seems to deflate, as if Polly’s words stuck a needle in her spine, letting the air out of her stiffened back. “I’m sorry, Polly,” she whispers, emotion thick in her voice. “I didn’t understand. I didn’t listen.”
“You’re right. You didn’t,” she snaps. “You always think I’m just being stupid Polly. Immature Polly. High, irresponsible, bitchy Polly. And maybe I am those things, but I am also a damn good saddle, and there’s no shame in that.”
“Of course there’s not,” Rissa says imploringly. “I was a saddle by choice in the beginning. I never thought that.”
“Good. Because you were a damn good one too, and I liked that we were a team. But we can’t be one anymore. Our king is dead and now we’re here, and we both want different things.”
A sheen of moisture glazes over Rissa’s eyes, and she dips her head slightly. I’ve never seen Rissa so cowed. “You’re right. I’m sorry.”
Polly gives a sharp nod, and then her back seems to loosen some of its stiffness as well. She drags her gaze to the window, arms crossed in front of her as she lets out a sigh. “Well. At least this place isn’t so damn cold,” she muses.
Rissa seems to take that as some sort of consolation and sends her a soft smile. “Yes. No more cold.”
The two women share a look, some of the hostility seeping away.
Of course, then Polly turns and levels her eyes on me. “Now, I need a bath to wash off weeks of traveling from my body, and a new dress so I can look my best. And then I want some coin and a carriage ride to the best and most expensive brothel in the city, because they’re about to employ their best saddle. Unless of course King Rot wants a new royal saddle,” she says with an arrogant twist of her lips.
I ignore that part, my eyes flicking to Rissa. “Some coin?”
She shrugs. “I told Polly that since you’re here with King Rot, you’d give us some help. Saddle to saddle.”
“She tried to drug me,” I say dryly.
“On Midas’s orders,” Polly retorts. “And what was I supposed to do? I couldn’t disobey him. Women have to do what they have to do.”
I let out a sigh, but sympathy rises up in me even though I don’t want it to. After everything, I don’t want to keep giving myself to people like Polly and Mist. But she’s right. Women have to do what they have to do. I just think our idea of that happens to be two very different things. “I’ll have something for you before you leave.”
I think surprise flashes over her eyes for a moment, but she shutters it before I can tell for sure. “So,” she begins, looking around the room, finger dragging over one of the high back cushioned chairs. “You changed kings quickly.”
I look at her coolly. “On the contrary. I changed far too slowly.”
She says nothing at that.
I get to my feet, closing the distance between us. “For what it’s worth, Polly, I hope you can be happy here in Fourth Kingdom.”
Her eyes narrow, like she doesn’t believe me. “Of course I’ll be happy,” she says defensively, as if she’s out to prove herself right, no matter the cost.
“What about you?” I ask Rissa. “Are you wanting to leave the kingdom? Because I have to warn you, I’m not sure where in Orea is the best place to be right now.”
“Actually, I was thinking of…staying here.”
My brows jump up. “Staying?” I didn’t expect that. All Rissa’s been talking about is leaving. Traveling. Getting far away from everything that reminds her of her life as a royal saddle. Maybe she wants to stay to watch over Polly, but for some reason, I think it’s more than that.
“Yes,” she replies tartly, ending the discussion in that succinct single-word answer as she gets to her feet. “Now, I’ll need a bath and a dress too, and also a room where I can sleep. I can’t even tell you how utterly sick I am of sleeping in a tent and being caught in the shadow of that hairy oaf every night.”
That’s the second time she’s mentioned him.
“Did something...happen between you and Osrik?” I ask carefully.
The flare of irritation in her eyes is withering enough to make my brows lift. “Me with that lout? Of course not,” she replies hotly.
So hot that there’s another blush burned on her cheeks.
Interesting.
“Right,” I say slowly. “Let’s…go get you those baths.”
“Honestly,” Rissa grumbles behind my back as she and Polly follow me out of the room. “Me and him. The very idea.”
The very idea indeed.
CHAPTER 56
AUREN
It feels like all of my nerves have condensed right into the pit of my stomach.
Tonight, Slade has to give Manu his official answer. Night has already dripped from the sky and sunk into the land, slowly blotting out the last remaining hours.
I’m on the roof, my hair loose down my back, some of the strands tickling my cheeks. The sky is speckled with clouds that carry the scent of warm rain, but for now, it seems content to only bring a cool breeze.
My fingers are curled over the top of the wall as I look toward the army camp. I can’t see very much of it from here, since the mountain and the trees block most of it, and the castle itself hides the rest. But I can hear it.
I can hear the sound of thousands of soldiers down there, the same noises that I heard when I traveled right alongside them. I can see a few sparse fires through the trees lit up like little orange suns burning in pinpricks along the ground.
The army base is so full that roughshod buildings have been erected to house more of them, while the rest of the overflow has either been given lodging in the city inns or right here in the castle itself. To say it’s full is an understatement.
The Wrath have been sleeping down at the base every night, too. I think it helps the soldiers to see them down there, to know that their captains and commander aren’t just coming up to their plush rooms in the castle. I could tell Slade was torn, but he’s been staying here with me instead.
A noise above has me picking my gaze up and shooting toward the sky. I jump in surprise when a huge shadowy figure circles above, yelping when Argo lands right next to me.
I send him a glower. “You jerk. You scared me.”
He licks his chops, his long tongue grazing over his dagger-like teeth. Some of them seem to look darker than the others, maybe blood from an animal he hunted. When he licks his maw again, this time chewing something after, I wrinkle my nose. “Gross. Can you rinse before you come up here and slop your chops at me?”
He cocks his head, iridescent eyes flashing. The sheer size of him alone still makes me a little nervous in his presence, although I have to admit, he has grown on me.