“Really? Looks like you weren’t thinking much about me over the weekend, am I right?” His tone is harsh, full of barely-restrained anger.
I frown, slamming my laptop shut. “What do you mean?”
“You think I don’t know?”
My heart lodges in my throat, making it hard for me to breathe. “Don’t know what?”
“Who you were with this weekend? What you two were doing? I’m disappointed in you, Wren. You broke your promise.”
Oh God. How does he know? How did he find out? Who told him?
“Daddy, wait—”
“I don’t want to hear your excuses or your lies. Because that’s what you did, Wren. You lied to me. You told me you were going to Vermont with Maggie when you didn’t. You went with that insufferable—boy and did inappropriate things. You shared a bed with him. I know you did. I saw the proof.”
My brain is scrambling, trying to keep up with what he’s saying. “How do you know?”
“I’m glad you’re not trying to deny it. You’re doing the right thing.” He hesitates only for a moment. Long enough for me to realize tears are running down my face. “I have access to your iCloud. I logged in and saw the inappropriate photos.”
I briefly close my eyes, my heart sinking fast. I remember the photos I took of Crew that Saturday night. With his shirt off and my lip-gloss imprint on his chest. Much later that night, after we’d had sex twice and we were about to fall asleep, I took one last photo of the two of us lying in bed, my head resting on his naked shoulder, our gazes sleepy, our smiles full of satisfaction as I took a selfie. I wanted to document the moment. The night I gave my virginity to Crew.
And my father saw all of it. Even the photos I took Saturday afternoon of us downtown. The decorations. Crew sitting across from me at lunch.
None of those photos were meant for anyone else’s eyes but mine. And Crew’s.
“Do you have anything to say for yourself?” Daddy asks when I remain quiet.
“What am I supposed to say? I can’t defend myself. You’ve seen all the evidence.” I swallow hard. “I didn’t know you had access to my iCloud.”
“That’s clear,” he retorts. “From everything I saw on your most recent camera roll, I almost regret looking.”
That’s false. I’m sure he doesn’t regret it, since he finally caught me in a lie. Like he’s been hoping to catch me in one all of these years. Why else would he need access to my iCloud account?
Because he doesn’t trust me. He’s never fully trusted me after I did something so incredibly stupid when I was twelve.
Well, I’m not twelve anymore. I’d like to think I’m smarter than I was. I’m definitely stronger.
I think.
“You’re coming home now,” he demands. “Tonight.”
“Daddy! I can’t. I have finals to complete. I’m writing a paper right now!”
“I’ll call the school and you can do everything online. I’ll tell them it’s a family emergency—which it is,” he says. “Don’t argue with me, Wren. You’re coming home early.”
“Daddy, please. Listen to me. I have to finish this paper and study for the final. It’s all happening tomorrow. It’s my first class since we’re on a finals’ schedule this week. How about I come home after that? The rest of my classes, I’m pretty much done.”
He’s quiet for a moment, and I rest my head on my desk, anxiously waiting for his answer. It’s not a lie. I do need to complete everything I listed.
But I also need a chance to explain to Crew what’s happening. He deserves to know.
To know my father most likely hates him.
“I’ll send a car to pick you up at noon. You better be on time with that driver, Wren. I’ll make sure he reports to me,” my father says, his voice firm.
“I’ll pack tonight,” I say, my voice shaky, my head aching.
So is my heart.
“And stay away from Lancaster. That boy is trouble. I’ve done my research. His brothers are always trying to steal my clients. I wouldn’t doubt that’s why he’s getting with you. He’s just using you to get closer to me, to help his brothers,” Daddy explains.
I lift my head, anger suffusing me, though I keep quiet.
The world doesn’t revolve around him. Something he still doesn’t quite get. Not everyone gets close to me or my mother in order to get to him. It doesn’t work like that. Not always.
“Okay,” I mumble, not meaning it.
“We’ll discuss this further tomorrow.” He blows out a harsh breath. “I’m so disappointed in your choices, Pumpkin. You were on the right path, and you’ve ruined everything.”
“Having sex doesn’t ruin your life, Daddy,” I bite out, annoyance filling me.
“Don’t talk back,” he snaps. “Who are you right now?”
Before I can tell him, I’m your daughter, he ends the call.
And I burst into tears.
FORTY-THREE
CREW
I wait for her outside the front of her dorm, unreasonably keyed-up. Anxious.
Words I don’t normally use to describe how I’m feeling.
I tried texting with Wren last night, but she wasn’t very responsive. Even distant. She blamed it on the paper she finished and all the studying she was doing for the history final, but I don’t know.
It feels like something’s wrong. I just can’t put my finger on it.
She was a little odd yesterday too, and I’m still not quite sure why. I get that I’m acting different, and I understand why. Spending the entire weekend with her, having sex with her, fuck. I’m obsessed.
I want her again. In any way I can get her. I can’t stop thinking about her. Yesterday I couldn’t stop touching her. I wanted the whole damn world to know she’s mine. She belonged to me.
Wearing that damn purity ring her father gave her on a chain around my neck felt like the right thing to do. Before we left the cabin, I found it on the nightstand and snagged it up, slipping it into my pocket. I forgot to tell her I had it, and when I got into my room that afternoon and shed my clothes to take a shower, the ring fell onto the floor with a soft pinging sound.
I grabbed it, holding it up to the light, the idea forming. What the ring symbolizes, she no longer is.
Because of me.
I deserve to wear that damn ring around my neck. Maybe she doesn’t like that I did that, but I don’t want to give it back.
If she wants it back though, I’ll give it to her. Reluctantly.
The doors swing open and a group of girls come striding out, but they’re not Wren. I smile grimly at them as they pass by me, a couple of them saying good morning.
I check my phone for the time, realizing she’s running later than usual. Where’s my girl at?
That I even think of her as my girl is mind-blowing. We haven’t made an official declaration to each other, but it feels serious to me. I care about her. I’m worried about her.
Where is she?
The doors swing open again, and she appears. Wearing the black puffy coat and the Mary Janes on her feet, her legs clad in white wool tights. She spots me almost immediately, her expression unreadable and dread consumes me as she draws closer. She’s not smiling. Her eyes are rimmed red.
I go to her, reaching for her, but she dodges away from my hold.
“What’s wrong?” I ask her, not bothering with niceties.
She shakes her head, her eyes filling with tears. “I have to go home today.”
I frown. “You have to?”
“Yes. My father, he’s—mad at me.” She sniffs, the tears now falling freely.
I take a step closer, wiping them away with my thumb as I rest my other hand on her hip. “Why?”
“He—he knows about us, Crew. And he was so upset. I broke my promise to him and he’s angry.”
“How does he know?”
“He has access to my iCloud. I didn’t know about that. He saw my camera roll. The photos I took of us over the weekend. Saturday night.” She shifts closer to me, pressing her forehead against my shoulder. “I’m so ashamed.”
Irritation fills me. Nice word choice. “You’re ashamed of us being together? Or that we got caught?”
“Both. More that we got caught.” She takes a deep, shuddering breath before she lifts her head, her tortured gaze meeting mine. “I told him I wouldn’t do that.”