Unfortunately, I couldn’t read all the letters. I brushed my fingers over the old words, and suddenly the pendant radiated a strong heat—so strong that I almost dropped it. The feeling disappeared as suddenly as it had come. I wondered whether I had only imagined it. But I could have sworn that the metal had almost scorched my hand. No, scorching wasn’t the right word; it hadn’t hurt. It was more of a very intense, good feeling—warm, like sitting in front of a campfire. I shook my head to sort my thoughts.
I slid my fingers over the letters again, bracing myself, but nothing happened.
Well, of course nothing happened, silly, I told myself. It was a piece of silver on an old chain! Still, I couldn’t help feeling disappointed.
My phone rang.
“Sam! Do you know what just happened?”
It was Kim, of course.
“What?”
“You won’t believe this. Justin Summers kissed me!”
“Justin?”
“After you left—and way to say good-bye, by the way—Ryan left in a hurry. And then all of a sudden, I was standing there alone with Justin.”
“Ryan’s best friend?”
“Yes… You don’t sound like you’re happy for me.”
It was obvious that Kim was disappointed with my commentary, so I quickly changed my approach.
“No, it’s great. Of course I’m happy for you! I just don’t quite understand what actually happened. Start at the beginning.”
“We were just standing around talking, and suddenly Justin looked really shy. Then he said he thought it was very sad that I was so into Ryan. And I was totally confused. But before I could say anything, he leaned down and kissed me.”
“Whoa!”
“I know, unbelievable! But you know what’s weird? I always thought he was kind of cute.”
Kim was speaking so fast that I had difficulty picking up everything. I hadn’t seen her this excited since we visited that candy factory in fifth grade.
“And, oh my God, he was a good kisser!”
“What about Ryan?” I asked.
“Well… it turns out Ryan is in love with someone else.” Kim could no longer hold back. She almost shrieked as she burst out, “And that someone is you!”
I almost dropped the phone.
“Me?”
“Well, that’s what Justin said, and he’s Ryan’s best friend.”
“Oh, Kim. I am so sorry.” I felt awful about this development. “I would never try to take him from you. I swear, I’m not interested in him!”
“Nah, it’s cool. He’d probably never be into me. Anyway, he had his chance, right? You should totally go for him.”
My thoughts were jumping all over the place. I didn’t know if I was happy or not.
“Well, anyway, that’s so cool about you and Justin,” I said. “I’m really happy for you.”
“Thanks! I’d better go now. I need to text Justin and make sure he’s coming to the beach party.”
“Kim, wait—”
But she had already hung up.
I grimaced. Now I wanted to go to the stupid party even less.
Music was booming across the beach and a roaring bonfire threw a red glow toward the sky. Tiki torches lined the wide arc of the shore. Kim was grinning like a Cheshire cat. I could barely keep myself from frowning.
“I don’t understand why I have to come with you,” I groused. “You’re going to be meeting up with Justin anyway. Do you think I really want to sit around watching you two make out?”
Kim laughed. “Oh, come on, it looks like a good party. And Ryan will be here.”
I made a face and shrugged. I had a plan: I’d drop Kim off, and then I’d leave.
Justin and Ryan walked in together, carrying an enormous cooler between them. Their arms flexed, and I have to admit, even I noticed. Kim jabbed me in the ribs with her elbow.
“They’re here! God, I don’t believe it—the two cutest guys at our school, and they want to be with us!”
I didn’t really think it was so unbelievable—they’d probably been with all the other girls. We were the only ones left.
“Kim!” Justin bounded over to his newest conquest and wrapped his arms around her. She melted in his arms.
“Hey, Sam,” Ryan said. “It’s cool about those two, huh?”
“Yeah, cool,” I said as I tried to wander away.
I didn’t know what on earth I should talk to Ryan about, but he didn’t seem concerned. He grabbed my hand and pulled me down to sit in the sand.
“I was thinking,” he said, “maybe we should leave the two of them alone. Want to go for a walk?”
“Why would anyone go to a party if they’d rather be alone? I’ll just stay here, thanks.”
My rudeness seemed to annoy Ryan, and he got up and walked back to the rest of the group.
Why was it always so complicated with boys? I liked Ryan, but it just didn’t make sense that he would seriously like me. I certainly didn’t want to be the one everyone laughed at later on.
I watched as he opened a bottle of beer with his friends. Then Lisa turned up and got a beer, too. Kim and Justin were dancing, and every few seconds they kissed.
I was in a really bad mood. OK, well, what if Ryan really had been serious, I thought. Wouldn’t he just leave Lisa and come to me?
“Sam?”
Ryan’s voice brought me back to reality. Oh.
“Here, I brought you something to drink.”
He handed me a beer and sat down close to me.
“Thanks.”
I took a small sip. I hated beer—I wasn’t a big fan of alcohol. Still, I was nervous, so I drank half the bottle.
“Are you going to spend the whole night sitting way over here?” His voice was soft, and he put his hand on mine, stroking it with his thumb.
“What do you care?” I didn’t know why I was being so rude.
“Why do I care? I like you. It’s that simple.”
I pulled my hand back. “And when exactly did you decide that? At practice, when you had your arms wrapped around Lisa? Or last summer, when you were sleeping with my cousin?”
Wow, it must have been the beer talking. I was being awful. Ryan got up and brushed the sand off his jeans. “I think the two of us need to talk.”
He took my hand and helped me up, pulling me behind him until we were quite a distance past the torches.
“What’s your problem?” he said. “I tell you I’m into you, and you start being mean.”
“Please excuse me for not reacting appropriately to your passionate confession.”
“I know you like me, too. What I don’t understand is why you won’t admit it.”
“You’re awfully full of yourself!” I pulled away and stormed back the way we had come. I hadn’t gone far when he caught up.
“Come on, Sam. This is going absolutely the wrong way.” He brushed through his hair with his hand, softening me with a remorseful look.
“Ryan, listen,” I said. “You’re the hottest guy in school. But you need to find someone else to tease because I’m done.”
I downed the other half of my beer in one gulp and pushed the empty bottle back into his hand.
“Enjoy the party.” I started to take off.
Kim was busy anyway, and I couldn’t care less about Ryan. I was even a bit proud of myself. I’d blown off the hot guy before he could make a fool of me.
“Hey, Sam,” he called after me. “There’s just one thing I want to know… Don’t you still need to be kissed?”
I pretended I hadn’t heard him.
“Damn, I don’t see why you have to be so cold. Your cousin Ashley sure isn’t!”
I stopped and turned.
“Asshole! If you really want to know, it’s true, I haven’t ever kissed a boy. But I’d rather eat a handful of sand than kiss you! My first kiss will be with someone worth kissing. And another thing—I wouldn’t consider Ashley a big score. She’s not exactly picky.”
I spent the rest of the weekend curled up in my room. I didn’t even return Kim’s calls or texts. She was in the throes of her first love, and she wouldn’t get it anyway. Even I didn’t know why I’d acted the way I did. At least I wouldn’t have to worry about Ryan anymore.