As I skipped downstairs, my parents muffled voices became louder until I could hear them clearly. “I don’t get why you’re against this, Max! This might be the thing that works. She might be able to get through to our daughter!” Mum snapped. I held my breath and pressed my back against the wall to try to disappear.
“She won’t go to the doctor though!” Dad replied slowly. “You can’t force her. You saw what that did last time.” Sliding down the wall, I wrapped my arms around my legs. Last time Mum tried taking me to the doctors, I was so scared. Dad was standing behind her, calmly giving me that look; the look that I didn’t ever dare disobey. I completely broke down and couldn’t breathe. I could still remember how tight my chest felt, and those little black spots that blurred my vision right before I passed out.
Mum sighed heavily. “I won’t let her get like that again. Are you coming with me or not?” Please say no, please say no.
“I won’t do that to her. I’m not tricking my daughter into this. You remember what the child psychologist said. We shouldn’t push her, and she will ask for help whenever she is ready for it. When Oakley is ready, Sarah, not you.”
“Do you even want her to get better?” Mum snapped angrily. Her voice was sharp and high-pitched. I flinched at how harsh she sounded.
“How can you even ask me that? Of course I do, but I will not force her into this. Whatever is going on with her, it will be all right. We’ll deal with it, whatever happens. If that’s her wanting help to speak again or not. She’s our daughter, and if she’s happy then that’s all that matters to me,” he reasoned. I actually believed what he was saying, he was that good at lying. Dad was smooth; well-liked and respected by everyone that knew him. No one would believe you over him.
“I’m sorry.” I heard Mum sigh and everything went quiet. “I just want to find out what’s wrong. It just gets harder the older she gets.”
Her voice was muffled as if she was speaking against something. Dad’s shoulder maybe. “I’m still going to take her... Don’t, Max, if she starts panicking like before we’ll turn around and come straight home. I can’t just sit back and do nothing.”
I wished she would. Every time she tried to help me it would just end up with her crying and me feeling like crap. Taking a deep breath, I pushed myself up off the floor. Sitting there listening to their argument about me was getting too much. I swallowed the lump in my throat and ran my fingers through my hair. As I walked into the kitchen, they both turned and smiled at me.
Mum tried to discreetly wipe the tears from her cheek.
“Morning, sweetheart,” she said warmly. “Hot chocolate?” I nodded and sat down at the table. “Croissants are in the oven, they shouldn’t be long.”
“I’m going to have a shower,” Dad informed us and walked out of the kitchen. He didn’t want to be around us. That was fine by me.
“How was your date last night?” How did she know it was a date? Did Cole tell her? Of course he didn’t, you idiot! Perhaps it was just obvious? I frowned and shook my head.
“It wasn’t a date?” Her face fell. “Oh. Well, did you have a nice time anyway?”
Jasper came downstairs, and Mum changed the subject, knowing how protective he could get. I idly wondered how he would react if he knew the truth about what happened to me. Out of everyone I thought Jasper was the most likely to believe me. Although there was a three-year age gap between us and he annoyed the hell out of me, we were close. That also meant that I didn’t ever want him to find out; I wouldn’t be able to cope if he didn’t believe me.
“So, what’s everyone doing today?” Jasper asked, and stuffed a hot croissant fresh from the oven into his mouth. I waited for him to react to the heat and spit it back on his plate but he didn’t. Was his mouth made of steel?
“I’m taking Oakley to gymnastics, and then going food shopping,” Mum replied, smiling at Jasper briefly while she busied herself buttering the croissants. “What about you?”
“Computer,” he mumbled and stuffed more food in his mouth.
“You could look for a part-time job?” Mum suggested.
Jasper scrunched his nose up.
“Or not.”
Lazy boy. It was my parents’ fault though; they had said they would support us while we were still in full-time education. Until Jasper finished college, he wouldn’t have to do anything.
Mum shook her head but didn’t say anything else to him. She turned to me.
“So I was thinking we could go clothes shopping on Thursday? I need some things for the holiday and thought it would be nice for us both to get our nails done.”
So the appointment was on Thursday. I nodded my head and picked at my food, no longer feeling hungry. How am I going to get myself out of this one?
“Great,” she beamed. “Now eat up, we’ve got to leave in half an hour.”