I watched the corner of Steed's mouth pull up slightly and then cringed as I realized what was coming. He threw me a quick wink just before the first knife barreled toward me.
My first reaction was to close my eyes and duck but instead I forced myself to counter his move. Though I still resisted, my eyes squinting partially shut, I flung my hand, palm out toward the blade, and turned the knife just before it reached me. I relaxed a fraction due to my success, but the blade rebounded from the floor as a second one joined it, both flying directly toward me, faster this time. I focused on them, and then further out to Steed, as I pushed them back, flipping the blades toward him and willing them to my target. He efficiently knocked them aside and lost his playful smile as he focused on the others.
An assortment of knives was now heading directly for me at an alarming rate. I steadied myself, intending to stop them all with one move, when Chevelle’s voice broke my concentration. “Are you throwing knives at her?”
The blades clattered to the floor as Steed blanched at the accusation and Ruby choked on a laugh or her food (or both). I flushed, though I’d technically not been at fault this time.
Ruby, still smiling, stood as she said, “I’ll take her to the practice rooms and catch her on fire instead.”
Chevelle appeared to be in a foul mood. “No, I’ll take over.”
I didn’t understand it had been a dismissal until Ruby winked at me, almost apologetically, as she turned to go. Steed bumped his elbow at my side on his way past, and I watched them as he followed her through the door. My throat was thick when they disappeared. I forced my gaze to meet Chevelle’s but he wasn’t watching me.
He stepped over to the table, taking a seat away from the trays, and motioned for me to join him. My legs felt like lead but I forced them to move.
I sat on his side of the table, but left a chair between us. It was awkward, but I didn’t want him to see my hands tremble, hear how I struggled to breathe evenly. He didn’t seem to notice and, after a moment, I wasn’t sure he even realized I was waiting for him to speak.
The silence built and, as usual, I panicked, blurting out a ridiculous and unnecessary statement. “It was kind of my fault, I looked at the knives and-”
My defense of Steed broke off when Chevelle looked up at me, perplexed by my words. I could see then that he’d not been thinking of anything resembling my training and my mind raced to figure out what could have him so… concerned. Too slow as always, I recalled seeing him earlier, a tense meeting with Ruby and Steed. I’d been so caught off guard by the confusing emotions of the Rune and arranged marriage revelations that I’d not noticed the atmosphere - and then my mind caught up and I asked before I could stop myself, “What did Junnie say?”
He looked surprised and then, finally, nodded slowly before he began in his practiced, careful tone, “You’re remembering more?”
I flushed again at his question, unsure of the implication, and then could only nod in reply.
I thought he was embarrassed for a moment before he explained more clearly. “About council?”
“Oh,” I started, “um, I don’t know.” Ugh. I tried again. “Well, I had remembered some of them, mostly just their faces. But, well, the things I’m getting lately,” I blushed, “they are more about… me.”
“You?”
“Well, the old me, I guess.” His eyes were on me and I couldn’t stop the flow of babble. “And other stuff. I remember Anvil and stones and… and the path.” It took all of my strength not to mention Rune and the lightning and the broken him on the floor. Fortunately, no part of me could even consider speaking the marriage details.
He didn't reply as he watched me, but his jaw tightened.
"What?" I asked, defensive as if he could somehow read my thoughts.
He shook his head and relaxed his face a fraction. I waited. After what seemed to be an eternity, he finally spoke. "It's just... frustrating."
I nodded in agreement automatically, I knew exactly how frustrating it was to have lost the memories, but then what he'd said sunk it. He was frustrated by it. I examined the idea, thinking how my binding affected him, all they'd had to do to protect me: taking care of the things that were supposed to be my responsibility, keeping my fragile brain safe by ferreting away all those secrets, grrr... And then, I briefly thought of the last of those secrets that had been revealed, the one I'd done my best to avoid thinking about, and I wondered if that was the cause. I flushed before I'd even had the chance to consider all the ramifications of that, couldn't think of all those inexplicable looks he'd given me, all the times he'd seemed as if he might reach out to me, couldn't begin to reclassify all that had passed between us in the months since I'd met him. Thought I'd met him.
I glanced at Chevelle, sure my flush would have him moving from me as usual, but he just stared back at me. That was worse.