Chapter Thirty-nine
Numb, I back away from her slowly, unable to absorb the fact that the Baby I knew is gone. But it’s right there in front of me: That clever, fearless, lovely girl has vanished.
“Quickly, follow me,” Dr. Samuels tells us.
“Amy, put on your hood,” Kay says, and I do it, glad to mask the pain on my face. I’m the last one out of Baby’s room, and I can’t help but look back at her, clutching her crayon and scribbling robotically. The door closes and the click of the latch feels like it’s severed something deep inside me, but I turn and follow them down the hall.
Dr. Samuels leads us quickly down a series of unfamiliar corridors and at last into some sort of meeting room. There’s an oval table surrounded by several chairs and a projection screen on the wall. “Wait here until I’m sure the coast is clear,” he tells us before ducking out the door.
I stand by the wall while Kay sits on the table. She gives me a moment before asking if I’m okay.
I nod only because I have to give her some response.
“We’ll go back for her, Amy,” Kay tells me, but this time I can’t even nod.
Then Dr. Samuels opens the door but doesn’t come in. He just stands there, staring at me for a moment. “Amy, I’m sorry. I had to.”
I frown, looking at him, then to Kay. “What?” I turn and see that standing behind him is my mother.
I glance at Kay, whose look of horror confirms my fear.
“What did you do?” she asks through gritted teeth.
Dr. Samuels has betrayed us.
“Amy!” My mother rushes me and hugs me to her. She smells like flowers and cotton, and in my bewilderment, I hug her back. Then I regain my senses and break her hold, backing quickly away.
She sees my look of confused hatred. “Amy, please. You don’t understand.”
“What don’t I understand?” I hiss. “How you left me to rot in the Ward, how you let them torture Baby?”
She shakes her head. “It’s not as simple as that.” She keeps her distance, but her voice is pleading. “I let him put you in the Ward because I thought it was the safest place for you. Then, when Dr. Samuels told me about what treatments you were really receiving, I went to Kay. I told her where you were.”
I stare at her, disbelieving. “You’re lying.”
“Amy.” I feel Kay move to my side. “She’s telling the truth. She wanted you out of there.”
“Amy, I couldn’t stand up to Dr. Reynolds then. Not directly. I didn’t have the support.”
“And now?” I ask. “Why are you here now?”
She shakes her head again. “Dr. Reynolds has gone mad since you escaped. He thinks I’m purposely stalling in finding a vaccine. Insane. He’s placed us all under surveillance. It’s impossible to get work done. I can’t leave the lab without being followed by that gorilla, Marcus. I’m sure he’s looking for me right now.”
I still don’t trust her. And yet, there are tears in her eyes.
“Amy, Dr. Reynolds was convinced you’d come back and contact me. He’s been waiting.” She steps closer, grips my arms. “It’s dangerous for you here, but when I saw you in the hall . . . I was so happy.” She releases me, presses the backs of her hands to her eyes.
I want to hate her, but part of me knows she’s telling the truth. She did her best. All the strings she pulled to keep me under Dr. Reynolds’s radar, all the conversations we had about how I needed to fit in to be happy. She was trying to protect me the only way she could.
Still, I can’t help but stay at arm’s length from her. “I only came back for Baby,” I tell her.
“Yes,” she says, a look of fresh pain crossing her face. “Baby. I’ve tried to keep her safe, tried to keep her from him. And that meant acting as though she didn’t matter, as though she were nothing more than an annoyance. I thought having her live in the dorms, distancing her from you, would be enough to keep her under his radar, but . . . one of the minders saw the injection scar on her neck and she was scooped up.”
She’s searching my face. I try to keep it frozen, but I feel my resolve melting.
“I had no idea who she was until then, but Dr. Reynolds is convinced I was keeping her from him. That I knew she was part of the original test group and I didn’t tell him. He began to spread rumors that, after your breakdown and escape, I couldn’t handle the strain. I know he wants me in the Ward.”
“What?”
“He sees me as a threat, Amy. He always has, and now—now he’s just unhinged.”