By the time the thaw came, we were all ready to move on. The little building had provided us shelter, and we were grateful. It was also small for the four of us when we had to stay near the fire pit for warmth.
The break had also given me a chance to get used to the sun without such burning heat. Now I felt ready to face it; I was used to staying awake during the day at least.
The morning we left, I took a long look at the place. We’d made it cozy and habitable, but unless we wanted to stay here, just the four of us, for the rest of our lives, we had to move on while the weather allowed. Since Fade didn’t know how far we had to go, we might need a long time to get there.
The ground was wet beneath my feet, and everything smelled fresh and clean. A little bite lingered in the air, but through my layers of clothing, I hardly noticed. We set out early and cut back toward the river. It shone silver in the distance with tall trees beside it. I had spent a good portion of the winter months asking the names of things I didn’t know, and they were all patient with me.
Now I could identify just about everything my eyes touched on as we walked. It would be hard traveling, but we could eat some of the plants, Tegan said. Fish leaped in the water, rippling the surface in telltale rings. Things could be worse.
We had been walking for five days, and that made our sixth, when the trees came into view around a turn in the river. I had seen a few here and there, but these lived in a village of their own. They clustered tight, throwing deep shadows across ground littered with fallen limbs and leaves. It gave off a rich, earthy smell, but better than dirt, and more rare.
I listened, enchanted, to the bird song. Bright flutters of color in red and blue among the green leaves made me cant my head in hope of seeing them fly free, burst upward, and soar on the wind. They didn’t oblige me, but continued to sing from the branches. Other sounds lay over the top of the rushing river, chatter of animals and scrabbling claws. I had never heard anything so lovely.
“We’ll find rabbits here,” Fade said.
Thanks to constant review of the letter book with Stalker, I knew R was for rabbit, and the picture matched the animals we set snares for, more or less. I nodded. “Should we do a little hunting along the way?”
“Let’s. Meet back here when you’re done. Come on, Tegan.” She gave me a puzzled glance as Fade strode deeper into the woods.
He had been doing that more and more lately, choosing her company over mine. At first, I thought it was because he didn’t want her to be alone with Stalker, but we’d been together for a while. If she still feared him, there was no hope for her.
“Let’s go get some meat for the pot, dove.” Stalker angled in the opposite direction, still into the trees, but away from the path Fade had chosen.
Blissful coolness spread over my skin as I entered the green-cast shade. Everything hushed as if the trees filtered sound as well as light. I could hear my footsteps, though I prided myself on my stealth. But maybe that only applied underground. Out here, I cracked every branch I stepped on.
As we went, Stalker laid his portion of the snares we’d made from stuff we found back at the old building. Then he led me away because the rabbits wouldn’t come running past if they smelled us close by. I didn’t mind this part of hunting; it was similar to what we’d done in the tunnels, only we hadn’t been catching rabbits.
He held up a hand when he thought we’d come far enough. I stood quiet, waiting for him to explain why I had to be silent. And then he stepped into my space, pushed me flat against a tree, and put his mouth on mine. He didn’t do it like Fade. His lips moved more and he pressed into me. I didn’t know how I felt about it, so I shoved him back.
“I thought you wanted me to.”
“Why?” I demanded.
“You taught me to read. And we spent all that time together training. I thought you knew it was an excuse to be close to you.”
I thought of all the times he’d stood behind me, his head near mine, hands on mine as he positioned my body, and I understood. But for me, it had been practice. I had missed any other meaning in it. When I thought of him, I admired his speed with the blades and the power of his scars. I didn’t know what else there might be. I’d never even considered it. He was my companion, like Tegan, but not like Fade. Nobody would ever be like Fade. That much, I knew.
“Why me? Why not Tegan?”
“I think Fade wants her,” he said with a shrug.
The words cut into me. Was that the reason he sought her out so often? Not just protecting her from Stalker. Maybe it was more.
He went on, “And even if he doesn’t, she’s just a Breeder. She doesn’t have anything else to offer. You, you’re like me.”
I didn’t know if that was true, or whether I wanted it to be. “You mean a Hunter?”
“Yes. You’re strong.”
My marks said I was anyway. Some I’d received on my naming day, and others I’d received in battle, as a true Huntress would. Someday I might even have people to protect again, if this journey ever ended.
I reached up, tentative, and touched my fingertips to his scars. Almost since I first saw him, I’d been curious. From the texture of his skin, they hadn’t used a hot blade to seal them. They had tasked him to heal them on his own. In its way, this was a kind of strength too.
“You don’t mind?”
His eyes closed. “I never let anybody do that before.”
“Why not?”
“It would look like weakness.”
That was a very Hunter thing to say. I understood that from the inside out, even if we’d grown up in different worlds. If you wanted people to take you seriously, you couldn’t let them think you were soft. You did whatever it took to prove you weren’t.
When I dropped my hand, he caught it and used it to pull me closer. Warmth curled through me when he lifted me up and ran his lips down my jaw to my neck. The feeling shook me, so I put my hands on his shoulders. I intended to shove or kick, something to remind him he couldn’t handle me this way. Instead, I found myself gazing down into his pale eyes. They didn’t look cold to me anymore; instead they shone like the sun on snow. For an instant, I saw Fade in his place, smiling up at me. And the sensation split until I couldn’t decide what I felt.
“We should—”
“Check the traps,” he finished.
Stalker set me on my feet, and I led the way, swirling with confusion. The snares only had one rabbit, but it was enough. So I collected the rest of them and he stowed them in his bag. Tegan and Fade met us in the appointed place with a couple more.
“How’d you do?” Fade asked.
And my cheeks burned as if he could see what we’d been doing. But for all I knew, maybe he had been doing the same with Tegan. Maybe the flush in her cheeks didn’t come from cold. They could’ve been pressed together in the shadow of the trees, whispering secrets. The idea didn’t make me like her less, but I did feel sad and heavy, as if I’d lost something without ever knowing what it was.