chapter Two
Emily
Two more hours. Two more hours and I could go home. I was already dreaming about the comfort of my bed. My eight hundred thread count sheets were my only splurge in the past year. I’d used the summer to take as many extra shifts as I could. I needed the money, and there were very few things that seemed worth dipping into my funds—a good night’s sleep was one of them.
I reattached the blood pressure cuff to Mrs. Nevelle. I really hoped her kids got there soon. She didn’t have much time left. I loved working as a nurse in the ICU because there was always something going on, but dealing with really sick people had its drawbacks. The worst was, of course, when they died. Mrs. Nevelle seemed ready. She was eighty-eight and, during the brief time she was coherent, she told me how excited she was to join her husband. I hoped that when my time came I’d have that attitude.
The unit was quiet that night. My shift had been easy. My second room was still empty, so Mrs. Nevelle had my undivided attention. I should have known it couldn’t stay that calm. I heard the phone ring so I went over to the nursing station—already confident it was going to be a report on a new patient.
I listened to the nurse down in the Emergency Room and took notes.
23 y/o male. Motor vehicle accident—BAL 0.3—arrived in respiratory distress—collapsed lung –intubated on arrival—scans negative for internal bleeding and vitals stable.
Great, a DUI. I couldn’t help it. I never had the same kind of sympathy for those patients. Anyone reckless enough to drive with a 0.3 blood alcohol level was most likely a certain type. It didn’t matter though. He still deserved the same care as anyone else. I got ready for the transport and waited.
As expected, it took a while. I wrapped my cardigan sweater around my shoulders. The worst part about summer was that they blasted the air conditioning in the hospital.
Transport wheeled the bed in, and I got my first look at the patient. He had brown hair, and was obviously tall, but I got pretty distracted by all the bruising. By the looks of him, he was lucky to be alive.
I went through the motions of getting him set up in the new bed, and connecting him to the monitors. I already knew he’d be intubated, but it was still hard to watch someone so young with a tube down their throat. I did everything carefully and methodically. I was a perfectionist when it came to my work.
Transport and the respiratory therapist left, leaving me alone in the room with the patient.
I picked up his chart. Jake Mathews. I guess he looked enough like a Jake. He wasn’t from Wilmington, but one of those tiny towns north of the city—Clayton Falls. I’d never been there, but I knew it was where my best friend, Mel, from nursing school grew up.
Mel was a few years younger than him, but considering how small she made her town sound, she might have known him.
I set aside the chart and turned back to him. “What in the world possessed you to drink and drive like that?”
Of course, he wasn’t going to answer. He was unconscious, letting a machine breathe for him. Even with his eyes closed and tons of bruising, I could tell he was handsome. It was a classical kind of handsome—with those chiseled features he probably could have been a model if he wanted to. From what I’d seen of his body, he was my type there too. I didn’t know too many men with a chest like that. I shouldn’t have been having those thoughts—the poor guy wasn’t even conscious. Maybe Mel was right, I needed to get out more.
I didn’t have an excuse to stay in his room any longer. He was stable, but he wasn’t going to come around anytime soon—not while he was on the ventilator with sedation. My shift was almost over, and I needed to get some sleep so I could turn around and come back the next night.
I took one last glance at sleeping handsome before I walked out of his room.
He should have been in bed. I couldn’t imagine how he could be walking around already, but there he was walking down the hall by the hospital cafeteria. He stopped right in front of me. “Excuse me, but I don’t think I’ve had the chance to introduce myself.”
“Jake.” His name left my lips without meaning it to. His eyes were brown. Not dark brown, light brown. It was such a pretty shade, and one I’d never seen before. The bruises were gone, and I could really see his face.
“What’s your name?” His voice was so deep, it almost didn’t fit him.
“Emily.”
“Emily, I’m going to kiss you now.”
I nodded, watching him with anticipation as he leaned in.
Beep. Beep. Beep. My alarm blared. Darn it. That always happened at the good part of a dream. The good part? I covered my eyes with my arm. I’d just been dreaming about a patient. Could I get more pathetic?
I dragged myself out of bed and into a hot shower. I followed it up with my usual few seconds of cold water. It was the only surefire way to wake myself up. I’d never been a morning person, and it wasn’t any different getting up at night instead. Satisfied I was awake, I switched the water back to warm and reveled in the steam it created. I stayed under the spray for as long as possible, but as the water started to cool, I knew it was time to get out.
Dressed in my blue scrubs, I made myself a cup of coffee. I had one small cup before pouring more into an extra-large travel mug. I usually finished the whole thing on the twenty minute commute to work.
I got in a little before my shift started at seven p.m. After twenty minutes of sign out from the day nurse, I checked on Mrs. Nevelle first. She’d made it through another day. I walked toward Jake’s room, but hesitated for a moment when I saw his family sitting with him. There were four people there—a couple in their fifties or sixties, probably his parents, a guy around his age that had such a striking resemblance to him that it had to be his brother, and a stunning blonde. The blonde gripped the brother’s hand—she wasn’t Jake’s girlfriend. Why did that thought even go through my head?
I waited a second longer and then entered the room.
“Good evening.” Dealing with the family was always complicated. They wanted to talk to the doctor, but more often than not, you were the only one there.
“Hi.” The mom turned to look at me, never letting go of her son’s hand. “Do you have any updates? Do you know how he’s doing?”
“He’s doing what he should be doing. The doctors want to keep him sedated on the ventilator for at least another day.”
“Another day? Is that safe?” She sounded panicked. Her husband placed a hand on her shoulder.
“Absolutely. Keeping him under is the safest option while intubated, until his lung injury has improved and he can be weaned from the vent.”
“Is he going to remember anything when he wakes up?” The blonde crossed her arms over her chest. She looked cold even though she was wearing a sweatshirt. I couldn’t blame her.
“He’ll probably remember everything up until the accident. But every situation is different. He won’t remember much from the ICU due to the sedation.” I was answering the blonde, but I looked at the mother. Her brown hair was in a messy ponytail. If it weren’t for the worry all over her face, I’d have thought she were younger.
The blonde and the brother exchanged a look. I was positive there was a story there.
“Nothing’s going to change tonight. Why don’t you all go home and get some rest.”
“I can’t leave him.” The mom squeezed his hand again.
“Maybe she’s right,” the brother said softly. “He’s going to need us alert when he wakes up.”
The mom looked conflicted. “Maybe for a few hours…you’ll call us if anything changes, right?”
I nodded. “Absolutely.” The brother was right. He would need them fully functional when he woke up. If they didn’t take care of themselves now, they wouldn’t have the strength when he needed them most.
I left the room, giving them some more time alone. I made sure to poke my head in again fifteen minutes later. There was no way they’d leave unless I was in the room.
“You’ll be with him?” the dad asked.
“Yes, or just at the nurse’s station.” I gestured out the door. “I only have one other patient.”
“Okay.” He nodded.
I smiled politely as they filed out. I understood they were going through a lot. In fact, they were handling it better than most families I saw.
I checked Jake’s vitals, recording everything. I took a seat next to the bed. “I’ll say it again, what were you thinking? Don’t you realize how much pain you’ve caused your family?” I sighed. “Okay, maybe that’s not fair. Maybe you had a reason. Just don’t ever do something that dumb again. You won’t get lucky twice.”
Without consciously thinking about it, I reached out and touched his hand. It was cool, and I picked it up in my own. His hand was large, and I could tell it was strong. He had some faint blisters, so he must have done some work with his hands. My initial assumption was that he was a rich boy—maybe I’d misjudged that. By the faint sunburn on his neck and arms, he probably worked outdoors. Maybe he fished or something. I’d always loved the idea of boats. I just didn’t have much experience with them. Growing up in the mountains can make that kind of experience hard to come by.
I stalled a while longer before going to check on Mrs. Nevelle. There was just something about that guy that got me. I really needed to get out more.
I spent much longer than necessary with Jake the next night too. Maybe it was his age. I was only two years younger, but I was drawn to him. I wanted to know his story. I wanted to know if his voice matched that ridiculously deep one from my dream. My dream. I still couldn’t believe I’d dreamed about him. At least it was only once. Any more than that and I would have been seriously worried.
The third night I had to do the daily awakening to see if he was ready to come off the vent. Unfortunately, I didn’t know in time to tell his family to stay. I waited for the medication to wear off, and I was alone in his room when he squeezed my hand. It was a gentle squeeze, but it affected me in a way it shouldn’t have. It warmed me. I kept my hand in his to see if he would do it again. He did. His eyes flickered open and struggled to focus on me. I waited to see if he’d wake up more, but he didn’t. After the doctor came by, we restarted his sedation.
The next night they started to wean the medication before I came in. His family was on pins and needles as we all waited in his room to see what happened, and whether he was ready. I’d told them about the hand squeeze and that his eyes opened. The relief on his mother’s face was incredible.
“Is it always like this?” the mother, who I now knew was named Mary, asked me quietly.
I wasn’t exactly sure what she was asking, but I didn’t think it really mattered. She just wanted to talk. “It’s always hard.”
“He’s a good kid. He’s made some bad decisions, but underneath it all he’s got a real great heart.” She started to tear up, and her other son, Ben, walked over to put an arm around her. They looked like such a tight-knit family. I vaguely remembered when mine used to feel that way. I brushed that thought aside.
“I’m sure he is.”
“He’s handsome, isn’t he?” Then she probably remembered who currently had his arm around her. “Both my sons are.”
I smiled. “Yes. They both are.”
The blonde, Molly, left her chair and came to join us a few feet from the bed. “How long does the medication take to wear off?”
“A few hours, so it should be anytime now.”
Mary was the one holding Jake’s hand when he woke up that night. He managed to keep his eyes open longer, and I could have sworn they searched our faces until they landed on mine. It shouldn’t have sent a thrill through me—but it did.