The change in her mental processes bewildered her.
“That was a big sigh.” TJ examined her closely, his dark eyes peering into her soul. “What deep thoughts are making you so sad?”
Shit. The relaxed peace faded a little. There was such a short time left before their ride appeared to return them to civilization, and she still didn’t know what to do. “Thinking about everything you’ve shown me. You know, the mating list and all.”
He strummed softly for a minute, the light melody from the finger-picked strings floating around them. He meant to soothe her, she was sure of it, but as the now-familiar tune he played filled her ears and her heart, tears threatened. It was the same song he’d sung to her at the wedding, with eternal love and new hope all tied up in it.
She wanted more and more to believe.
TJ leaned back on the upper porch railing. “There’s this older couple who run the Chilkat Bakery in town. Both human. I think they said they’ve been married for fifty-five years.”
Pam glanced at him with suspicion. Where was this going? “So?”
He placed the guitar aside and joined her on the swing. “You ever seen a couple like that? Married for so long, they seem to read each other’s minds?” He wrapped a hand around her neck to massage the tight muscles. “They seem to know exactly what the other person needs at any time.”
“Are you saying humans can have a mating connection? I’ve never heard that before in my life.”
“Okay, maybe it’s not exactly the same thing, but it must be fairly close. I’ve seen it. They know each other so deeply they anticipate each other’s thoughts, and needs. That’s what it’s like for wolves—the only thing that seems to be different is how quickly it happens. For wolves, it’s instant. In humans, I’ve seen it in couples who have been together for a long time.”
Pam bit her lip. Frick. Again, him with the logic. She couldn’t fight logic, and yet the ball of fear in her belly didn’t want to disappear.
“What are your parents like?”
She turned toward him. Yeah, he knew all the right buttons to push, far better than any person she’d met before. Not even Maggie had asked about her family that quickly. “We’re divorced.”
TJ’s face fell. “Shit.”
“Yeah.”
“Okay, so I guess they’re not a great example.” He stopped and stared at her for second. “Hang on, what do you mean ‘we’re divorced’?”
Pam dragged a hand through her hair. “They got divorced when I was about ten, and proceeded to make my life miserable. They both screwed up holiday plans to get revenge on the other. They fought over me like a dog with a bone, but when they had time with me they ignored me, or seemed to begrudge the fact they had to expend energy on my stuff.”
“By the time I was sixteen I’d had enough. I divorced them and went to live with my gramma who was completely disgusted with them both. She passed away when I was nineteen. I’ve been on my own ever since.”
She said it simply, a statement of fact. Taking control of her life ten years ago at such a young age had been hard, but she’d had to do it. It had been the right thing, she was sure.
TJ kissed her temple softly, then nestled her under his arm. He linked their fingers together and rested their joined hands in his lap. “Do you ever see your parents?”
She shook her head. “And it’s not because I’m hiding from them. Honestly, I’m not bitter or wishing them ill anymore. I cut the ties and decided I was responsible for my own happiness. They just don’t seem to give a damn. I think I remind them of each other or something, and they hate each other with a vengeance.” She shrugged.
He grimaced. “So telling you stories about human happily-ever-afters…”
Pam leaned back on him and sighed. “Sheer fantasy. Werewolves are a whole lot more believable.” A whole lot more desirable as well, from what she could tell. TJ appeared to know exactly who he was and where he stood. Had he gained that confidence from being a wolf?
TJ stroked her fingers gently with his thumb. “I’ve had the pack around me all my life. While I get razzed a great deal for being clumsy, they’ve always supported me. My brother, my friends, heck…everyone.”
“You’re not clumsy.”
He laughed out loud. “Okay, there’s another topic for discussion. Umm, yes, I am. For some reason I’m not nearly as bad when I’m around you.” He nuzzled her neck. “That ‘you complete me’ thing.”
She slapped him lightly. “Get out. I think you’re like a puppy coming into his growth. You should have seen the trouble my first dog had—”
He groaned. “Can we make a deal now that you don’t compare me to your previous dogs. Please?”
A snort slipped out. “We’ll see.”
She twisted to stare at him. His earnest expression stole her heart.