When Hearts Collide

chapter 13

That night, Molly slept in Gracie’s room again. She decided she might actually get more rest if she lay beside the child and the rising heat in her body woke her than if she had to keep coming in and checking on her.

She’d been in a light sleep with visions of blond-haired children and a dark-haired men dancing around her when something woke her. Her first concern was Gracie. Had her fever come back? But the child’s skin felt cool. What had roused her? She lay in the shadowed room and listened.

A loud crash sounded close by. Molly leapt out of the bed, her, fear depositing a foul taste in her mouth. She swallowed it and glanced at Gracie. Thankfully the noise hadn’t woken her. Was that a groan? She hurried to the door. Had a burglar broken into the house? She looked at Trooper. Why wasn’t he barking? He raised his head, looked at Gracie, then as if assured his charge was safe, he wagged his tail and put his head back down.

Great watchdog you are,” Molly growled.

She glanced around the room for a weapon. Gracie’s red baseball bat stuck out of her toy box. It was plastic but large enough to pack a significant wallop. Her hand shook as she eased it out of the out of the toy box. Raising it over her shoulder, Molly eased the door open. Trooper rose and reluctantly followed her into the dimly lit hallway.

Molly peeked toward the stairway. A form crouched by the top of the stairs—something large and dark, veiled in the shadows.

Where was the closest phone? She thought of the one in Pearce’s bedroom. It was the first doorway before the stairs, just feet from the crouching form. She wouldn’t be able to make it. If she tried for it, all the person had to do was reach out and grab her ankle, and he would have her.

Maybe she could knock him out, rush past him, get the phone. No. If she weren’t successful, he could get to Gracie. An intense need to protect the child overwhelmed her. Whatever it took, she wouldn’t let him get Gracie.

Raising the bat above her head, Molly took a cautious step into the hall. She heard a groan, then a muffled curse. She froze. There was something familiar about that groan. She’d heard it before. A groan of pain.

The figure moved and Molly saw the glow of two eyes in the dimness. The line from an old Western movie came to her, “Don’t shoot until you see the whites of their eyes.” Her grip tightened on the bat. She heard another muffled curse.

Pearce?

If you’re planning to put me out of my misery, now would be a good time,” Pearce said.

Molly’s grip on the baseball bat loosened. “What are you doing up here? How...?”

I was crawling. But then I tripped. I would appreciate a hand if you could dispose of that menacing weapon. You look like you’re auditioning for the Dodgers.”

Molly was relieved the dimness of the hallway hid her flaming cheeks. Relinquishing her hold on the bat, she rushed forward. “I’m sorry. I heard the crash. I didn’t know what caused it.” She laughed. “I thought you were a burglar.”

Great burglar I’d make. A one-legged cripple.”

Kneeling beside him, Molly slid her arm under his. Together they got him to his feet. Then, doing a three-legged hobble, they made it to the door of Gracie’s room. Molly settled him in the rocking chair. Trooper was relieved to return to his position on the rug beside Gracie’s bed.

It was in the early morning hours that Molly was wakened by the heat of Gracie’s body. Pearce, refusing to leave, had fallen asleep in the rocking chair. He must have heard her moving about.

How is she?”

Her fever’s back,” Molly said.

Can you give her more Tylenol?”

It’s too soon. I just gave her some less than two hours ago. I’ll give her some Advil, then I’ll give her a bath and see if that helps.”

I thought that was one of those myth remedies,” Pearce said.

Molly smiled. “The ice water bath is too cold. It makes the person shiver and actually increases the temperature. A tepid sponge bath can help.”

Are you going to do that now?”

I’ll check her temperature to see how high it is.”

His voice laced with emotion, he asked, “Can you help me? I want to sit beside her.”

Let me give the Advil first.”

He stood while Molly positioned the rocker beside the bed. She assisted him to the chair, feeling his weight sag against her. She saw the worry in his drawn cheeks.

After settling him, she took the thermometer and slid it under Gracie’s armpit. She held her breath while she waited for a beep that seemed to take forever. She removed the thermometer and looked at the digital readout.

What is it?” Pearce asked.

103.3.”

He leaned forward. “What does that mean?”

It’s high. I’m going give her the sponge bath. Maybe by the time I’m done, the Advil will start working.”

Pearce hovered until she was finished giving Gracie the sponge bath. Adjusting the thin blanket over the feverish child, Molly cradled her in her lap. When she shivered, Molly wanted to put a warmer blanket over her, but it would increase the fever. She would just have to wait for the medication to start working.

She thought of some of the old wives’ tales used to get rid of a fever—putting a child in ice water, putting scorching coins on their back, giving them Aspirin, giving them an alcohol rub. How many times as a nurse had she shaken her head at the methods parents had tried? Now she could understand their desperation for anything that might work, and Gracie wasn’t even her child.

Molly’s arms ached from holding the sleeping child in one position for the past hour, but she couldn’t put her down. She’d tried twice, and as soon as her arms loosened, Gracie had woken and began crying. Molly shifted slightly and was relieved when the child merely sighed loudly before snuggling back into the cradle of her arms.

Eventually the combination worked. The fever came down to 99.5. Molly prayed it would stay down. Gracie’s breathing became easier, less labored. The fever-bright circles on her cheeks faded to a dull salmon. Molly caressed the damp blond head. Looking up, she caught Pearce’s gaze and their eyes locked. He tipped his head and smiled.

A penny for your thoughts,” Molly said.

I was just thinking what a great mother you make,” Pearce said. “I’m so glad you were there when we needed you.” His smile looked wistful. “And still need you.”

Molly felt as if she too were feverish. She looked away in case Pearce saw the fire in her cheeks. Did he know how she longed to be a mother, longed for a family to call her own? Though she longed for a child of her own, Gracie had captured her heart. How was she ever going to be able to leave her? Or this man who, like his child, had ensnared her heart. How could she leave him?

In the stillness of the room, Molly kept vigil over her now sleeping charges. It was just before sunrise when Molly shook his shoulder. “Pearce, Pearce. Her fever’s broken. I think she’ll be okay now. You need to go to bed. You can’t sleep in that chair all night.”

His head jerked up, and Molly found herself caught in the dark blue pools of his eyes. His lips curved into a gentle smile, and his hand reached up and caressed her cheek. “Oh, Molly, how can I ever thank you?” His hand branded into her flesh. “You have done so much for us.”

She looked away from the intensity in his eyes. She couldn’t reveal to him how much it meant to her to be here, to feel part of his family. That it wasn’t work when you looked after people you cared about. How could she tell him how fond she’d become of both of them? Her mouth felt like she’d been walking in the desert for days. How could she tell him that she no longer did it for the money? That she stayed because she’d fallen in love with him, fallen in love with both of them.

Let me help you back to bed.”

Pearce used the arms of the chair to get himself upright. Molly slid her arm around his back and helped him hobble to his room. He was worn out by the time he reached the bed and flopped down on the mattress.

Before Molly could move away, his face turned toward her. His lips were so close, the heat of his breath tickled her cheek. Then his lips were brushing her skin. Her breath caught in her throat. An uneven sigh escaped his lips, tickling hers just before they met. She felt the soft touch of his mouth and returned the pressure.

He groaned as her lips parted and his tongue teased hers, intensifying the kiss, intensifying her response. She leaned into him. His fingertips caressed the tender hollow of her neck. Her heart raced and tiny electric shocks sprinted along her shoulders.

Then his hand traced downward, a whisper touch to her soft curves. A shudder ran through her. His hand cupped her breast, and she felt her nipples react through the thin cotton of her nightie. She leaned into him.

What was she doing?

No. We can’t.” Molly pulled away so quickly she almost lost her balance. Turning so he couldn’t see the tears trickling down her face, she ran out of the room.

Molly woke the next morning to the sound of Gracie laughing. She glanced at the clock on the dresser. 9:15. She’d overslept. Where was Gracie? The laugh sounded like it was coming from outside. She scrambled out of bed. How did she get outside? Was anyone with her? Molly raced to the window.

Below, on the patio, she saw Gracie, fully dressed and throwing a ball for Trooper. Pearce sat in his wheelchair at the patio table drinking a cup of coffee. He also was fully dressed.

She threw on a pair of slacks and a T-shirt and raced down the stairs. Her heart sank into her chest as she realized her time here would soon be ending. Soon neither of them would need her. Pearce looked up as she slid open the patio door.

Hello, sleepy head.”

Pearce, I’m sorry. I overslept.”

He was grinning, and the twinkle in his eyes made him look ten years younger. Molly felt the blush coloring her cheeks. Overdue for a haircut, his black hair curled down the nape of his neck, and she resisted the urge to reach out and run her fingers through the waves. He’d been going outside every day, and now a bronze gleam replaced his hospital pallor. Molly stopped in her tracks. He was so attractive she had to swallow the lump in her throat before she could breathe, or speak.

How did Gracie get dressed? Has she eaten yet?”

I told her to bring her clothes down here and let you sleep. You’ve been overdoing it lately, what with looking after me, and Gracie, especially when she got sick. Now she’s better, we need to take care of our nurse so she doesn’t get sick. I know I get cranky and don’t show it sometimes, but Molly, I really appreciate what you’re doing for us.”

Molly turned away so he couldn’t see the hurt in her eyes. I don’t want your appreciation. I want your love. I want to be part of your family, your life. But instead, she held those thoughts and merely said, “Gracie is such an adorable child, it’s been a pleasure looking after her.”

Molly Mommy.” Gracie ran toward her, Trooper trotting at her side. “I thought you were going to sleep all day. Daddy wouldn’t let me wake you.”

Molly lifted Gracie and swung her around. “Well, I’m up now, Missy.” Molly laughed. “What would you like to do today?”

Go to the beach. That’s what I want.”

You don’t feel sick any more.”

Nope. Feel my head.” Gracie lifted her forehead for Molly to check her temperature.

No fever,” Molly announced. She raised an eyebrow at Peace. “You don’t mind if I take her to the beach? We won’t overdo it.”

Of course I do. I want to come, too.”

Are you sure you feel up to it?”

If we go to Grand Bend, we can park the car right on the beach. I think I can crutch it a few feet. You’ll have to handle the beach gear.”

Molly made a show of flexing her biceps. His resounding chuckle cut any tension between them, and Molly couldn’t help but join in.

Gracie, the beach is a great idea. Maybe you can help me make a picnic lunch.”

Can I?” Gracie asked.

Let’s see what we can find.” Gracie grabbed Molly’s hand and followed her into the kitchen. Together they pulled out bread, peanut butter, tuna, salmon, cookies, and boxed drinks. Molly set the loaf of bread and jar of peanut butter on the table as Pearce made it into the room. “One picnic lunch coming up,” she said, then asked, “Do you want tuna, salmon, or egg?”

What choices.” A twinkle danced in his eyes, and Molly felt butterflies take flight in her stomach.

I’ll have one of each,” he said. Leaning his crutches against the table, he sat across from her. “Would you like some help?”

Well, if you’re going to be greedy...”

Hand me the bread, lady. And the butter.”

There was that grin again, the one that sent her senses reeling. Molly took a quick breath. It didn’t help, so she took another. She felt as if someone had her chest in a vice. Pearce wasn’t even close enough to touch her. Lately, just being in the room with him seemed to be all it took for her to have trouble breathing. And this wasn’t the type of trouble that a couple of puffs of an inhaler would help. She felt him watching her and the vice tightened.

Are you okay?” Pearce asked.

The concern in the rich velvet of his voice sent her heart fluttering. She nodded to find her voice. She didn’t want him coming closer. That would just make it worse. She swallowed, then blurted out. “It must be the dog.”

Maybe we have to find him a new home?”

Oh no!” Molly wanted to kick herself. She’d said the first thing she could think of for an excuse. She wasn’t allergic to dogs. “I probably just need to give him another bath. He hasn’t been looked after for a while.”

Are you sure?”

She raised her head to prove she was fine. “Yes, I’m okay now.” That is unless I need to speak a long sentence, or you get any closer.

That’s good, ‘cause we’ve all got pretty used to having him around, especially Gracie.”

He leaned closer. Not only did she feel her lungs tighten, but her heart was pounding so hard she thought Pearce might hear it. Molly rose quickly and crossed to counter. Rummaging through the cutlery drawer, she gave herself a few seconds to gain control before going back to making their lunch.

It wasn’t long before they had a towering stack of sandwiches and were on their way. The beach was quiet and they were able to park near the shore. With his crutches, and Molly supporting him, Pearce made it across the uneven sand. They found a spot near the water, and Molly spread out a blanket for Gracie, and folding lawn chairs for herself and Pearce.

Molly slid an arm around Pearce’s back and held the chair while he lowered himself into it. As if her internal furnace had switched on by his closeness, searing waves swept through her body. She remembered the sensation of his lips on hers, and the heat increased ten-fold, as if her own lips had been left to sear on an open flame. The internal heat made her dizzy and Molly was relieved to flop into her own chair.

Gracie pointed toward some children building a sandcastle ten feet away. “Can I play with them?”

Yes, as long as you don’t go anywhere else,” Pearce said.

Bobbing her head in agreement, Gracie raced off.

The silence in her absence was comfortable. Neither had spoken about the incident of the previous night. While Molly laid out the picnic supplies, she felt Pearce’s eyes on her. He stared intently, searching, but for what? She felt heat rise up from her toes, inching up until it reached her hairline. She kept her eyes averted. Did this man have any idea of the effect he had on her?

Gracie ran back. “Molly Mommy, can we go swimming?”

A good cold dousing was just what she needed. Maybe that would put a damper on her out-of-control emotions. “I’ll race you to the water.”

Molly discarded the terrycloth cover-up on the lawn chair. Usually she wore casual clothes, loose fitting, prim, only hinting at the sensual shape beneath. Today she wore a bikini that was the same shade of emerald as her eyes. No longer hidden, her body gleamed with the golden tan she developed. She felt Pearce’s eyes examining her. She grabbed Gracie’s hand and ran with her to the cover of the water.

Coming back to the blanket, Molly was conscious of the swell of her breasts showing above the triangular scraps of emerald Lycra. She felt Pearce’s glance running slowly from her face, down her torso, pausing at her hips, then traveling down the length of her tanned legs. The ember of a long subdued flame began to flicker and spark as Pearce stared at the expanse of her bare skin.

Molly grabbed the cover up and swathed it around her but saw the gleam in Pearce’s eyes and it didn’t take much imagination to know what he was thinking. Thankfully, Gracie provided a needed distraction.

Molly Mommy, can we eat now? I’m starving.”

They devoured the mountain of sandwiches in no time, and then Gracie was off to build another sandcastle. Molly leaned back on the beach chair and listened to the rhythmic slapping of the waves on the white sand.

She tried to relax, but her thoughts were as turbulent as the lake was calm. One part of her wanted to stay with Pearce and Gracie forever; the other part wanted to get away before her heart was lost with no chance of rescue. As if mocking her, seagulls circled and swooped above, their shrieks shattering the silence.

Gracie ran back, and throwing her arms around Molly’s neck, she planted a sloppy kiss on her cheek, then skipped around the blanket. “We’re just like a real family, Daddy, Molly Mommy, and me.”

You and I are a real family,” Pearce told Gracie.

And now we have Molly Mommy,” the child said.

Yes, but Molly is not your real mother.”

She’s our Molly Mommy.”

When I’m better, she’ll go back to her own life.”

No!” Gracie ran to Molly and clenched her chubby arms around her neck. “My Molly Mommy.”

The child clung to Molly for several minutes before calming down and wanting to play with her new friends again. When she was gone, Pearce spoke, “Gracie is getting too attached to you.”

Molly’s body went rigid at his words and harsh tone. What could she say? The child had become dependent on her.

I can’t let her get hurt.”

Molly turned to him. “Get hurt?”

It will be hard on her when you leave.”

Molly was stunned. She’d gotten so used to being part of their family that the reality of having to leave hit her as hard as if she’d been punched in the gut. Suddenly she felt frozen, as if she was walking barefoot in a snowstorm. She drew the terrycloth robe closed and turned her head away. Could he know how much he’d hurt her?

I thought Rachel would be the loving, caring wife and mother I’d never had. I can’t make that mistake again,” Pearce said, his tone razor-edged with bitterness.

Despite how he sounded, Pearce found it hard to keep pretending he had no feelings for her. Every time she came close, he wanted to reach out and pull her into his arms. Every time she smiled at him and he saw the way her lips turned up like an impish elf, he wanted to capture those lips and devour them.

Right now, she was so close, as close as a person could be without touching, it was driving him crazy. He wanted to kiss her. One little kiss. He lied to himself that one would be enough. But he knew she was like a drug to him and that one little kiss would be disastrous. He would want more—more kisses, longer, deeper, and that would still not be enough. He had to cut himself off, like an addict who knew the consequences.

If she stayed, she might want to get married. He wanted her to stay. He cared about her, needed her, but love? That was a big word, and a bigger concept. He wasn’t ready to say that word again. His luck was not in love.

But when he looked at Molly, and the way she cared for Gracie, it put a chink in his armor. It had almost broken through, almost. But he couldn’t let that happen. He couldn’t deny the overwhelming urge to be near her, smell her, touch her, every waking moment, but deny himself, he must. It was better for all of them. Better to hurt her now than to let it continue and the hurt to become more intense.

Molly, you know how much I appreciate what you have done for me, staying here and looking after us.”

She was afraid to look him in eye, afraid he would see the love for them reflected in her own eyes. Instead, she kept her gaze lowered and nodded her response.

You have to realize, I can’t love someone else. I loved Rachel. I won’t let myself get hurt like that again, or let Gracie get hurt.” He reached out his hand to her. “I care about you, but we can’t be more than friends.”

But what about me? Their attraction might be mutual, but he didn’t want another wife. He’d been crystal-clear in letting her know that. He didn’t want to risk losing his heart again. Yet, more than that, he wouldn’t risk Gracie becoming attached to a mother figure and have her heart broken.

She’d known her time with Pearce was limited, but she hadn’t expected to feel so deeply for him. Her heart was being ripped out of her chest, like a tree uprooted in a hurricane.

It was as if a stake had been driven into her heart. He still had feelings for his dead wife. He couldn’t let those feelings go, even if they were filled with bitterness and pain. The thought of him pining for another woman was more than she could bear. Molly might be attractive, but his wife had been an international model. She could never compete with Rachel.

The pleasure of the day had vanished as suddenly as a summer storm. A conversation that had started so innocuously. An innocent comment that turned and ignited like the fuse on a stick of dynamite, dispersing lightning sparks, and she was the collateral damage.

The drive home was silent. Luckily, Gracie had worn herself out and slept, unaware of the tension hovering over the two adults. As soon as the car pulled into the driveway, Molly jumped out, grabbed Gracie, and rushed through the door before Pearce was out of the car. She just wanted to get Gracie into bed and escape to the sanctity of her own room.

She slammed the car door behind her and hurried up the stairs. Her body shook with rage. How could he be so arrogant, so selfish, so cruel? And she’d thought she might be falling in love with him.

Fortunately she had found out what she meant to him. But was it too late?