I drew in a breath, lifted the covers, and slid into bed.
He returned momentarily with a glass of water. He handed it to me and I took it. I drank a long swallow, wondering if I should be sad that he’d manufactured this reason to leave the room while I undressed, or impressed that he was a gentleman at heart.
I landed on the side of gentleman. “Thank you,” I said.
“It’s just water,” he answered, but he smiled in what I thought was understanding. He nodded toward the bed. “Sleep now.”
“I—” I stumbled on my words. “I don’t want to be alone.”
He bent and gently stroked my forehead. “I’ll be right here.” I watched as he settled himself in the floral print armchair near the wall of windows, the dark expanse of the lake behind him with just a few scattered boat lights glittering like stars. “Sleep,” he repeated, and I nodded, suddenly aware of how heavy my eyelids felt.
I snuggled under the covers, then let myself drift off.
I felt warm. I felt safe. I felt protected.
At least until the shadows came.
The scream cut through the air, so loud and sharp and painful that it wrenched me awake.
Strong arms surrounded me, and I drew in a breath, terrified, and only then realizing that I’d been the one doing the screaming.
“Deep breaths, baby. I’ve got you. Just take some deep breaths. You’re safe. You’re with me and you’re safe.” Evan’s voice washed over me, warm and commanding, as if simply by saying that I was safe he could make it so. I was sitting upright, clutching tight to him. My arms were around him, my hands fisted in the back of his T-shirt.
The sheet had tumbled away to gather at my waist, and my breasts were pressed against him. His hands, big and warm and strong, gently stroked my bare back as I gulped in air, trying to shake free of the tendrils of fear that still clung to me, cold and menacing.
“You’re safe,” he repeated gently. “You’re okay.”
I nodded, realizing as I did that I was starting to believe it. I was awake. I was safe. I was warm in the security of Evan’s arms.
I’m not sure how long he held me like that. All I know is that by the time I finally did pull away, he’d given me enough of his strength to make it the rest of the way on my own.
“Better now?”
I nodded, then sat upright on the bed, one leg tucked under me. I took the tissue he handed me and blew my nose.
“Was it about Gracie?”
I closed my eyes in silent acknowledgement. “It was like I was there. The men. They were attacking her. They had knives. They were coming at her. But I couldn’t do anything. I couldn’t move. I wasn’t there—not really. But I had to watch. I had to watch, because it shouldn’t have been her at all. It should have been me.”
Once again, the tears burst forth, and he gathered me into his arms. I thought that I should pull away or curl up into a ball or tell him to leave me be for just a little while until I managed to get my act together. But I didn’t. I didn’t have the strength, but more than that, I didn’t have the desire.
For so long, I’d been fighting the nightmares by myself. To have Evan beside me now, giving me both strength and comfort was like opening the biggest present on Christmas morning.
He stroked my back slowly, but I could feel the tension in his touch. “I should have just walked away.”
I didn’t have a clue what he was talking about, and I pulled away only long enough to look at him with curiosity.
“In the alley,” he explained. “I should have taken you back inside the club. I should have walked away from those assholes. Gone inside. Called a bouncer. Just gotten clear. Anything to get you away from there.” He cupped my cheek with his palm. “I didn’t think. I wanted you—goddammit, I wanted you so fucking much—and I just didn’t think about what you’d see. What you’d think.”