“I hate to say it’s likely to get worse before it gets better.”
The thought of it getting any worse makes me sick. I lean against the wall, closing my eyes when they fill with tears. Hearing the details of what happened to Natalie shreds me. My emotions are all over the place. “I want to protect her, but I don’t know how.”
“The most important thing you can do is keep her off the Internet and away from TV. She knows what happened. She doesn’t need to see it playing out for all the world to see—again. I’ve spoken with Liza, and we’re on it. Just take care of her and try not to worry. It’ll blow over in a couple of days.”
That may be true, but would Natalie ever be the same joyful, sweet person she was before her life and painful past were exposed to the world?
When the bedroom door opens, I tell Emmett I have to go. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“Talk to you then.”
I stash Addie’s phone in my pocket. “How is she?”
“She gave me permission to tell you she’s definitely in shock and having a physical reaction to it, thus the trembling and crying. I gave her a very light sedative to help her get some rest.” She hands me her business card. “If she’s still feeling anxious or has trouble sleeping, call me tomorrow and I’ll call in a script.”
“Is she… Will she be okay?”
“Eventually, but it’s going to take some time for her to process what’s happened. You’ll need to be patient and let her work through it in her own way.”
Patience isn’t exactly my best quality, but I’ll become the most patient man on earth if that’s what Natalie needs from me.
“Please call me if I can be of any further assistance to either of you.”
“Thank you so much for coming.”
“Of course. Gabe speaks so fondly of you and the others at Quantum. I know how much you mean to him.”
“He’s one of the good ones for sure.”
“I’ll let myself out so you can get back to Natalie.”
“Thanks again.” I step into the bedroom, where the only light is coming from the bathroom. Natalie’s eyes are closed, but her cheeks are still wet with tears. As I get closer to the bed, her eyes open. Even in the midst of despair, I feel the connection that has drawn us together since the day we met. And now that connection has ruined her life.
“Can I get you anything?”
She shakes her head. “Will you… Can you…”
“What, honey? Anything.”
“Will you hold me?” Her voice breaks on a sob. “Please?”
“There’s nothing else in this world I’d rather do.” I’m thankful—and humbled—that she still wants me close to her after the mess I’ve made of things. I strip off my shirt and drop my jeans into a pile on the floor and crawl into bed with her.
Releasing an anguished moan, she turns into my embrace, pressing her face into my chest.
Tears fill my eyes and spill down my face. I can’t bear her pain. It’s as if someone is sticking a knife straight through my heart. “It’s okay, baby. I’m right here, and everything is going to be okay. I promise.”
I run my hand over her back, which is covered by my bulky robe. Her shoulders shake with the power of her sobs. “Everyone will know,” she says so softly I almost don’t hear her. “The whole world will know what happened to me.”
“And they’ll know you survived and thrived in spite of it. They’ll know that part, too.”
“I didn’t want anyone to know. I didn’t want you to know.”
“Baby, nothing could ever change the way I feel about you. If anything, I love you even more than I did this morning, and I wouldn’t have thought that was possible.”
“It’s humiliating.”
“Remember what you said to me once? That it took years of therapy to be able to realize this was done to you? It wasn’t your fault? Same thing now. You didn’t do this. Someone else did, and we’re going to make him pay. I promise you that.”
“What will it matter if he pays? Everyone will still know. You’ll know.”
“Natalie, sweetheart, it doesn’t change anything for me. I’d still choose you a thousand times. A million times.”
She burrows her face into the nook between my neck and shoulder, and I hold her as close as I possibly can. We stay that way, her sobs gentling, until we hear a telltale yip from the hallway.
“Fluff!”
The excitement I hear in her voice fills me with hope. “Stay right here. I’ll get her for you.” I kiss her forehead and get up from the bed, taking a minute to pull on my jeans before I open the door to Leah and Addie, who are about to knock.
Fluff sees me and shows me the ten teeth she has left in her fourteen-year-old mouth.
“Fluff,” Natalie says. “Come to Mama.”
The little white ball of fur bolts into my room and onto my bed, where she’s reunited with Natalie.
“Thanks, Leah.” Natalie’s roommate is trying not to stare at my bare chest.
“Um, sure. Could I see Nat? Just for a minute?”
“Of course. Go on in.” I step aside to let her enter the room.