I’m removing my top when he approaches me, and I expect him to turn the couch so it’s facing inward, but instead he helps me out of my underwear, slowly, and wrestles with my body until I find my bare bottom resting on the back of the squidgy piece of furniture with my feet on the seat. My naked back is exposed to the room, and I’m looking out across London’s beautiful skyline, only the lights of the buildings illuminating the wonderful architecture. ‘It would be far better to do this in the daytime,’ I say, flicking my hair over my shoulders and placing my hands on the back of the couch, on either side of my hips. ‘You’ll see the buildings far clearer.’
I shiver when the heat of his breath meets my skin, and soon after that, his lips. He kisses his way across my back, up the centre of my spine, and to the hollow beneath my ear. ‘If it was light, you wouldn’t be the main subject.’ He takes my head and turns it until I’m gazing into sharp blues. ‘You are all I see.’ He kisses me tenderly, humming as he does, and I relax under the soft motions of his attentive lips. ‘Day or night, I see only you.’
I say nothing. I let him shower my face with kisses before he turns my face back towards the window and leaves me sitting on the back of the sofa, naked and completely unbothered by it. I try to admire the glowing landscape of London, something that I can usually lose myself in with ease, but hearing Miller busy behind me is far too distracting. So I take a little peek over my shoulder, finding him collecting an array of brushes and paints, his tall body slightly bent, his disobedient curl tickling his forehead. I smile when he blows it away, unable to brush it with a hand because they’re full of artist’s tools. He positions everything he needs and removes his suit jacket before rolling up the sleeves of his shirt, but everything else is in place – his waistcoat, his tie.
‘You’re going to paint in your new suit?’ I ask, watching as he pauses mid-arranging of pots and paints. That really would be a huge leap for Miller.
‘Let’s not make a big deal of it.’ He doesn’t look at me and quickly resumes readying himself for a painting session. ‘Look down at your left shoulder.’
I frown. ‘Look at my shoulder?’
‘Yes.’ He strolls over, dipping a paintbrush in red paint. My eyes follow him until he’s standing at my back. Then he takes the thin-tipped brush and brings it to my shoulder. I watch as he writes three words on my flesh.
I LOVE YOU
‘I haven’t written it on your left shoulder yet. Don’t take your eyes off those words.’ He kisses my smiling face and leaves me again. But I don’t watch him take up position behind his easel. I keep my eyes on those three words. They beat admiring the skyline of London any day of the week.
I only move when I blink. Everything else I find easy to keep deathly still. The direction of my gaze to my shoulder allows me to see his movements, but not his face, which only mildly irritates me. What he’s doing now is relaxing him, and I’m more than happy to help. The seconds melt into minutes, and the minutes into hours. I’m a statuette for him, taking the quiet time to allow my settled mind to reflect on everything we’ve endured and plan ahead for what the future holds.
A future that includes our baby, my mother, and my father. I have no more room for resentment. Our new life will be starting problem-free. Clean and unspoiled. My mind is cleansed and so will our life be. I couldn’t feel anything other than totally at peace right now. I inhale on a serene breath and smile to myself.
‘Earth to Olivia.’ His liquid tone creeps past my contentment and rouses me. Then I feel the prickles of his closeness all over my naked skin. I look over my shoulder and find him standing close behind me, but he looks as pristine as the last time I saw him. There’s no evidence of paint on any part of him. ‘Were you thinking of me?’ His clean hands rest on my hips and his chest pushes to my back, coating me in expensive material.
‘I was.’ I remove my hands from the back of the couch and place them on his, feeling a little stiff, now I’ve finally moved. ‘How long have I been here?’
‘A few hours.’
‘My bum’s numb.’ It’s completely dead, and I expect my legs will be, too, if I try to stand.
‘Here.’ He lifts me over to him and lets me find my feet, keeping hold of me until I’m sure I’m not going to fold to the floor. ‘Are you hurting?’ His hand slips to my bum and starts massaging life back into my bottom.
‘Just a little stiff.’ I hold on to his shoulders while he spends time working his firm hands all over me, finishing at my tummy. He pauses circling motions and gazes down, but he doesn’t say anything for a long, long time. I let him have his moment, happy to watch him watching me.
‘Do you think he’ll be perfect?’ he asks, genuinely concerned. It makes me smile fondly.
‘In every way,’ I say, because I know he will be . . . just like Miller. ‘He?’
He looks up at me, and I find his eyes gushing with happiness. ‘I sense it. It’s a boy.’
‘How can you be so sure?’
He shakes his head a little, shying away from my curiously amused stare. ‘I just sense it.’
He’s lying. I take his dark stubbled chin and pull his face up. ‘Elaborate.’