Squirming uncomfortably from her accusation, I change the subject. “Even if I did make the promise, how are we supposed to get her to recite whatever I say? There’s no way. Not when she’s under the control of the mark.”
She ponders over this for a while, as if the thought hasn’t even crossed her mind until then. The longer it goes on, the more puzzled she appears. My hope in finding an easy way out of this is dwindling. Nothing’s ever easy, though. I should know that by now.
“I have a better idea,” I tell her, loosely using the word better. Because my idea isn’t better at all, but it’s doable.
“And what’s that?” she asks, confused.
I shrug, like what I’m about to say isn’t a big deal. “An emotional exorcism.”
She’s already shaking her head. “No way in hell. It’s too risky.”
“Well, it’s a good thing I like risks.” I try to force a cocky smile, but I miss the mark. I can act tough all I want, but what I’m proposing that we do to handle the situation is sort of terrifying.
“It’s not even the risk, though,” she says. “The last time someone did it, they died.”
“Well, death’s a risk I’m willing to take to save her.” As soon as I say it, I know it’s the truth, and the truth is more terrifying than I ever could have imagined.
I care enough for Gemma that I’m willing to risk my own life to free hers.
Chapter 6
(Alex)
“No. There’s no way we’re going to do that.” Aislin paces the length of the room, shaking her head as she stares at the floor. She’s been doing it since I divulged my plan of almost killing myself while Gemma’s awake in the hopes that it’ll bring her back.
“It can’t hurt to try,” I say, watching her from the bed, more stressed than I have ever been.
She stops in the middle of the room and puts her hands on her hips. “Can’t hurt to try? You could freaking die, Alex. And besides,” she starts pacing again, folding her arms, “she already tried to kill you and it didn’t bring her back.”
“It did something,” I argue, drawing a line up and down Gemma’s leg, missing her so much that it’s driving me crazy. It’s amazing how even when we’re close, I want to be closer. All those years apart and I never stopped thinking about her. Then we ran into each other at her grandparent’s house, and even though I thought it was forbidden, I also knew right then and then that I had to have her in my life again. “She’s been unconscious ever since.”
“Yeah, but—” she begins to protest again, but I interrupt her.
“Aislin, this isn’t up for debate,” I tell her, getting to my feet and cutting her off her pacing in the center of the room. “I’m doing this with or without your help.”
She huffs in aggravation, yet I already know she’ll help me. Aislin’s just that way; when it all comes down to it, she gives in.
“Fine.” She surrenders, throwing her hands in the air exasperatedly. “We’ll try it, but I really hope you know what you’re doing.”
the her heart. “One shot of it right here and your dead.”
Dead. As soon as she says it, reality crashes over me. I’m really going to do this, and if it all comes down to it—if it takes me actually jabbing a needle full of death into my heart to bring her back—I’ll do it. I’ll do whatever it takes, and it’s startling how okay I am with it; sacrificing my life to save hers.
“I might be able to bring you back if you use it,” Aislin says quietly, lowering her hand to her side. “As long as I don’t wait too long, but I can’t promise anything.”
“Let’s just hope I don’t have to use it,” I say. “That she’ll come back to me before it gets that far.”
She looks as doubtful as I feel but nods anyway and then leaves the room. And all I can do is wait with thoughts of death haunting my mind.
***
I wait with Gemma while Aislin goes to make her potion. My head is in a really fucked-up, weird place right now, swarming with emotions that I barely understand. She means so much to me—I don’t get it. How can I go from not caring about anything to caring about one person so much?
I’m stroking Gemma’s hair, lost in my thoughts, when her eyelids lift open. The sunlight from outside hits them, and for the briefest moment she looks like my Gemma, but as quickly as the look appears, it fades.
“What the hell?” She jerks back from my hand, swinging her free arm at me. “What are you doing?” She starts bucking her body up and down and I seriously about loose it,
Now is not the time to get a fucking hard on, I think to myself as I lean over and grab her arm, attempting to restrain her. She tries to bite me as I wrap the tie around her wrist and tie it securely.
“Alex, what are you doing?” she says, panic in her voice. I pause because she almost looks and sounds like her old self. “Please untie me. This hurts.”