Chapter Thirty-Three
“GO!” Quinn yells, pushing me out the door, her face half full of laughter while the other half is attempting to look scary fierce. It’s not working. I can only take someone so seriously when they’re donning pink flannel pajama pants with their feet clad in big bunny slippers, the ears flopping all over the place with their movements.
“Quinn! Let me in! I want to change!” I yell back, trying to charge my way through the front door.
“NO! No changing! GO!” she adds, with another shove. Stepping back, I cross my arms over my chest and breathe in deeply.
“Quinn, Kaeleb just left like half an hour ago. I would look like an idiot if I went charging over there right now.”
She shakes her head and happily closes the door behind her. “No, you wouldn’t. You would look like you’re going to get the man you love.” She steps forward and sets her hand on my shoulder. “You told me you were finally to the point where you are living. I can’t imagine a better way to start that life than with that man by your side.” She laughs when I give her a conceding shrug, then gently pushes my body away from her. “Go.”
“What about you?” I ask.
She huffs. “I’ll be fine. You already showed me the bedroom. That’s all I need to know. Lord knows I’m stuffed with all the casseroles flying around this place tonight. I’m going to call Tommy, then head to bed.”
I tighten my gaze at her. “You sure?”
“Positive,” she responds. “Now get that hot ass of yours into that car and GO!”
Releasing a long, contemplative exhale, I finally relent. “Fiiiiiiine.”
She giggles and claps the entire way as she follows me to the car. Once I’m inside, I roll my window down, the uncertainty about this whole situation settling into my stomach with a thud. “What if —”
“Nope. Not gonna happen.” She heads back to the door, gesturing excitedly for me to call her afterwards. I nod as I watch her disappear into Linda’s house.
After the funeral, we had a lot of people come by for the repast. There were tears, there were hugs, there were laughs, and there were definitely A LOT of casseroles. Quinn wasn’t lying about that. Palmer came and went, giving me his condolences and surprising me with a tender embrace before he left. When the number of visitors began to trickle down, Kaeleb also headed out, explaining he was getting a hotel room in order for Quinn and me to catch up, which I had planned on doing until she forced me out the door.
I’m still shaking my head as I pull out of the driveway. She could have at least let me change into something more comfortable.
As I drive down the highway, I briefly glance down at my attire, feeling a little overdressed and underprepared to deliver my speech of a lifetime. My nerves are at an all-time high and my brain is in overdrive, listing every single reason that Kaeleb might not take me back. Sudden doubt replaces my earlier confidence with each passing thought.
I left him when he needed me.
I hurt him on purpose.
I lost my virginity to someone else. And I don’t even remember it.
That last one almost causes me to turn around. I am in no way looking forward to that conversation.
That being said, I know what I want. And I want him.
I’m just hoping he still feels the same way.
Once I finally arrive, I make my way inside and bypass the front desk as I head to his room. Quinn announced his room number at least fifty times before my departure, so I know where I’m heading. After smoothing my dress, I take in a long, deep breath and press the elevator button. My heart is bouncing all over the place, ricocheting around like a speeding bullet as I ascend to the second floor. All I can seem to think about is that my life will soon be drastically changed.
For better or for worse.
I run my fingers through my hair as the door opens. An older couple greets me and I shyly smile in response to the laughter in their eyes.
My feet carry me on their own as my mind continues to fill with apprehension and nervous anxiety. My tortuous journey comes to an end after two right turns and an extremely long hallway.
The number 256 stares me in the face for about thirty seconds before I reprimand myself for being ridiculous and finally knock on the door. Heavy footsteps approach, and as the handle turns, I close my eyes and take in another deep breath. When I open them, I’m met with a sexy half-smile and beautiful hazel eyes. Eyes that don’t look at all stunned to see me. They actually look…relieved.
“Come on in.”
Slowly I step inside the room. The candlelight catches my eyes as the flames flicker and dance all around me. I stand there in shock, watching the glow that lines almost every inch of the room. Kaeleb clears his throat from behind me and I turn to face him. I eye him suspiciously before finally take notice of his appearance. A white undershirt clings snugly to his chest and around his biceps, and he’s still dressed in the pants and shoes from the funeral. The silver buckle on his belt catches my attention before my sight works its back up to his face.
And then it dawns on me.
They had this planned the whole time.
No wonder Quinn threw me out of the house.
The corner of my mouth jerks upward when the revelation hits me, prompting Kaeleb’s half-smile to turn into a full one.
“Damn it. I had a really good speech planned too,” I remark with feigned disappointment.
He cocks his brow and gestures for me to have a seat on the bed. My own eyebrows lift at his presumptuousness, sending a rumble of laughter through his chest. “Well, don’t let my wooing, as you like to call it, stop you. I’m suddenly very interested to hear this speech you have prepared.”
He takes a seat on the bed as I remain standing. Still smiling, he leans back against the pillows, locking his arms behind his head. He stretches his long legs out along the bed as he kicks off his shoes and crosses his feet at the ankles. His face is full of amusement as he widens his eyes, signaling me to begin. “Come on, Sunshine. Don’t go getting all shy on me now. Let’s hear it.”
My face pinches tightly as my eyes narrow in his direction. “Really?”
“Really.”
We stare at each other in some sort of unnecessary stand-off for a couple of minutes before a long conceding exhale passes through my lips. “Fine. I need some water though.”
Nothing like some preemptive stalling.
I make my way to the sink while running through my epic speech one more time in my head. Once I’ve downed the glass, I kick off my shoes and stride to the bed, displaying false confidence as I take a seat beside his legs.
Clearing my throat, I begin. “So, I’ve been thinking a lot about this,” I gesture between the two of us, “About us.”
Kaeleb responds with an encouraging nod but remains silent. “In the time we were apart, I changed. I mourned. I lost. I accepted. I grew. But the most important thing I did was survive. I survived all the things that frightened me the most. And do you want to know how I did that? What I focused on?”
His eyes hold mine as he unlocks his arms and brings them forward to reach for my hand. “Of course.”
Interlacing our fingers, I answer, “Balance.”
“Balance?”
“Yes, balance.” I tighten my grip on his hand. “You call me your sun, well you’re my moon, Kaeleb. I know it’s not the most romantic thing I could say right now, but it’s true. You’re my balance. You’re the ebb to my flow. You’re the day to my night. The light to my dark. With all the bad that I’ve experienced, you are the good that balances my life.”
Happy tears rise in my eyes and a smile crosses my face. “This brand new, beautiful life that I’ve just begun living doesn’t work without you in it. I need you, Kaeleb, like the sun needs the moon.”
A familiar, smart-aleck grin breaks across Kaeleb’s face. “You know, technically the sun doesn’t need the moon.” A chuckle escapes his throat and his shoulders bob with laughter as I pull my hand out of his and narrow my gaze at his statement.
“Really? You’re going to discount my entire extraordinary speech with your stupid-ass, know-it-all tendencies?”
His face falls serious as he leans forward into my line of sight. “Will you let me finish before you get all huffy?”
I cross my arms over my chest and indeed, huff.
He fights a smile. “But I do understand what you’re saying.”
His grin fades and his tone loses its humor. “I think some people are just inexplicably bonded. Drawn by forces beyond their own comprehension, they have no choice but to gravitate toward one another. Destined by fate to keep crossing paths until they finally get it right.”
He reaches to stroke my cheek with his fingertip. “So, yeah. I understand completely. Because the way I see it, we’re two people, so hopelessly intertwined, that without one, the other ceases to fully exist. You call me your moon, well, I call you my soul mate.”
My breath stalls and my heart hammers in my chest. Before I can say anything, he leans forward, hooking his hand around the back of my neck as he draws me into him, brushing his lips softly against mine. The taste of him as his tongue gently parts my lips…the scent of him as I breathe him in…the feel of him as I run my fingers along his chest…it flares every single one of my senses, bringing them to life with the need to absorb him. For our bodies to become one, to join, to immerse so deeply in one another so that there is no possible recognition of where one begins and the other ends.
I rise to my knees as he does the same, our mouths insatiable, growing with frenzy. My fingers work their way to his nape, pulling him as close as I can just to savor his taste. His teeth nibble along my bottom lip and his tongue tangles with mine as he releases his hold on my neck, to grasp my waist.
Slowly, he trails his fingertips along the curve of my hips…the tops of my arms…the elastic of my cap sleeves. He tugs them over the crest of my shoulders, and his mouth disengages from mine as his hands find their way to my jawline. I release a moan when he presses upward with his thumbs, forcing my head back and exposing my neck as he licks and nips his way to the hollow of my throat.
With his lips no longer on mine, a moment of clarity passes, and before this goes where I’m pretty sure it’s headed, I need to tell him about my indiscretion. The one mistake that could end all of this before it starts.
“Kaeleb.” My voice is throaty as my fingers find his face, splaying along his cheeks, trying to force him away from away from my neck. “Kaeleb, I need to tell you something.”
His body stiffens against mine before his head rises, bringing his face in line with mine. As he peers into my eyes, a moment of realization flashes across his face. He lowers himself and whispers in my ear, “I don’t want to know. I just need to know if you were safe.”
A relieved sob forces its way through my constricted throat as I nod my head, his scruff grating against my cheek as his warmth breath hits my ear with his own exhale.
“I’m sorry, Kaeleb.” The words become lodged as I swallow. “I was so lost. Searching for…something. Anything to take away the pain.”
He leans back and his thumbs stroke my cheeks as he shakes his head. “I’ve made mistakes too, Bree. You know that better than anyone. If you think I have any right to judge you for what you’ve done, you’re mistaken. This moment, right now. This is what matters. Not the f*cked up shit we’ve done in the past.”
He swipes another rolling tear. “This is our moment. A beginning and an end. Are you with me?”
My lips break into a comforted smile. “I never want to be without you. I love you, Kaeleb.”
“I love you too, Bree. Always have. Always will.” After another pass of his thumb alongside my cheeks, he fastens his fingers around my nape and crushes his lips to mine.
My arms circle around his neck and a moan escapes into his mouth, prompting his own guttural groan to pass into mine. Our bodies mesh together as I sink into his hold, his hands releasing me to find the zipper on the back of my dress. He unzips it slowly, sending shivers down my body with a rush of cool air and anticipation as he slides it methodically along my arms and over my hips. My knees lift, allowing him to free me of my constraints, and his eyes darken as they roam over my naked skin. My panties are removed as well, leaving me on my knees in front of him, completely stripped, free of clothing and inhibition.
My fingers find the hem of his undershirt and I lift it just as deliberately along his arms and over his head, fully appreciating every little bit of this moment that I can. My virginity may be lost, but I know this isn’t about sex. This is about two people who are about to give the ultimate gift to one another. Sex is one thing, but the act of making love, of joining together as you give your heart, your mind, your soul to another person, that’s something that I never want to forget.
When my hands slowly rise to his belt, my teeth find my bottom lip and I glance upward at his beautiful face. His eyes find mine, half-open and hooded, darkening another shade once my fingers make contact. We stare at each other, never breaking our connection as I unbuckle his belt, slide his pants over his lean hips, or when I pull them off and throw them to the floor. Our gazes remain locked as we take in the meaning of what’s about to happen. My entire body hums with desire, causing the air to become electric between us as his heavy-lidded eyes hold mine. Full of anticipation, need, longing, passion.
His arm hooks me around the waist as he flips me onto my back, his body settling snugly between my legs. The weight of his elbows dips the bed beside my head as he presses his hardness right where I need it the most. Pressing up on my heels, I grind against him hungrily, the feeling euphoric as he lowers his head to my neck; our slick, sweat-covered chests sliding with our movements. My nipples pebble with the friction as my legs find their way around his waist, locking around his back, pulling him closer. A hiss escapes his mouth, only to be silenced as his lips seal over my breast. The warmth of his mouth and the teasing of his tongue send my back flying off the bed as my hands find his hair. Tugging and pulling it, I allow him to work my other breast.
“Kaeleb, please.”
His mouth releases me, but his tongue doesn’t. With one long stroke, he trails his way from between my breasts, along the center of my neck and over my jaw, ending with his teeth grazing my chin. A surprised gasp parts my lips and Kaeleb takes full advantage as he dips his tongue into my mouth, sweeping over mine, sending my body into a heated frenzy. I release my hold on his hair and swiftly pull his boxers over his waist, only to let my feet do the rest of the work. My fingers dig into his flesh as he presses against my core, releasing another deep groan into my mouth. He soon positions himself at my entrance, but suddenly pulls back, sending my body into panic as his warmth vanishes.
“Bree, I need to—”
“No, you don’t,” I cut him off breathily. “I’ve been on the pill since I was twelve.”
A satisfied laugh fills the room. I open my eyes to see a cocky grin on his lips. “Eager are we?”
I don’t smile.
I don’t laugh.
I don’t respond.
I don’t do anything but reach up and grab his neck to heave him back down and devour his mouth with mine. He kisses me back, our lips working with equal fervor before he breaks away, looking me directly in the eyes as he positions himself for entry. My entire body quakes with his approach as he whispers in my ear, “You know, if the sun and the moon were to actually collide, it would set off a cataclysmic reaction of epic proportions. Are you ready to have your world completely obliterated?”
Laughter bubbles up and through my throat before I press my lips to his, mumbling against them, “Oh my God. Please, stop talking.”
His chuckle fills my mouth as he slowly presses forward, filling my body with his length. All humor is lost as our bodies become one. My insides take every bit of him as he settles in, claiming what’s his. What’s always belonged to him.
He withdraws, unhurried, and reenters slowly, as though memorizing me inch-by-inch. I can feel myself clenching around him, my body tightening as he hits an area that I never knew existed. “Damn.” I suck in a deep breath through my teeth. “Don’t stop.”
“I won’t, Sunshine. Not until you’re seeing stars.” His waist begins to circle, stroking me from the inside as his pelvis grinds against my throbbing bundle of nerves, aching for release.
I tighten.
I clench.
I build.
Until finally my body explodes and, as God is my witness, I actually see stars.
“Bree, God, that feels so…”
Kaeleb forms no more words as he becomes lost in me, driven by his own need. He curls his arm around my waist, hoisting my lower body upward as he pumps his entire length into me without reserve. I absorb each thrust, screaming for more, until he drives forward one last time. His body goes rigid as I feel his own explosion warming me on the inside. He continues pushing forward as I come off the tides, hungrily draining his release.
His chest falls onto mine and his forehead nestles into the crook of my neck, our sweat-laden bodies gliding smoothly with our heavy breaths.
“Jesus. I think I saw stars,” Kaeleb mumbles against my skin, his lips sending tingles shooting all over my sensitive body.
I laugh under my breath, sweeping my hand through his soaked hair. “Definitely a life-altering experience.”
His head rises, meeting my gaze as his hand finds my face and presses the hair out of my eyes, his lips curving into a lazy smile.
“You are a life-altering experience.” Leaning forward, he presses his lips against mine, sweetly yet without chaste.
As he ends the kiss, I giggle against his mouth. “Well, I am the sun.”
Backing away, he surveys my face as his mouth stretches into a beaming smile.
“And oh, how brightly you do shine.”
The Resurrection of Aubrey Mill
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