15
PATTI OROSCO LIVED alone in a small but beautifully appointed two-bedroom condominium on the semi-private road running parallel to Polk Street, at the bottom of the escarpment where Chestnut ended at the steps that climbed steeply up to Hyde. From her living room’s picture window, San Francisco’s western vista extended past the Palace of the Legion of Honor out to the low green hills of the Presidio, over to the Golden Gate Bridge, the bay, and Marin County on the right, Pacific Heights on the left.
After Sheriff Cushing had excused him from work for the foreseeable future, Hal Chase knew that his first duty was to go home and spell Ruth and Warren, who had certainly put in enough time watching his children. Instead, he’d called Patti and driven straight to her place.
Hal hadn’t seen her for the past three weeks, ever since he’d ended their five-month affair. And now, when she opened the door, her beauty brought an involuntary catch to his breath. She was barefoot in running shorts and a 49ers sweatshirt that was unsuccessful in camouflaging the assertive curve of her breasts. Her blond hair touched her shoulders and framed a face that Hal considered perfect. No. Beyond perfect.
They embraced, holding each other tightly for nearly a minute.
“I shouldn’t let you in here,” she said, but with a sigh, she took a step backward and pulled the door all the way open. When he came in, she closed it behind him, then led the way up the stairs and into the kitchen, where he pulled his familiar stool over to the bar and sat. She boosted herself onto the counter, feet crossed at the ankles, and gave him a searching look. “I . . .” she began. “I am so, so sorry.”
He nodded. “It’s the worst.”
“How are the kids?”
“Ruth’s with them for the time being. Will doesn’t have any idea, but Ellen . . . I think she’s starting to get it.”
“She’s a smart kid.”
“Yeah. Not always the advantage you think it might be.”
“No. Probably not.” She lowered her eyes, then raised them and met his gaze. “How are you holding up?”
“Pretty much not. It’s all so surreal.” He touched her cheek. “Thank you for saying you’d see me.”
“How could I not?”
“I could come up with lots of reasons, all of them good.”
“None would be good enough.”
He hesitated. “You know that the cops think she’s dead and that I killed her.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
He shrugged. “They don’t think so.”
“Well, I do.”
“That’s good. Because I didn’t.”
“Of course you didn’t.”
Hal blew out heavily. “I can’t tell you how good it is to hear you say that. When I didn’t hear from you . . .”
“I didn’t think, under the circumstances, that my calling you would be the best idea.”
He held up a hand. “I get it. I really shouldn’t have expected you to call. Not after the way it ended with us. But—”
“But it didn’t end,” she said. “It’s nowhere near over.” She slid off the counter and put her arms around him. “You don’t have to say anything, babe. You don’t have to make any decisions about me. I’m always going to be there for you, if that’s what you want. You know that, I hope.”
He leaned in to her. “I do know that. But right now . . .”
“Of course,” she said. “No pressure.” She gave him a quick kiss on the lips. “I still love you, you know.”
He nodded. “I’m in bad shape. I don’t know what’s happening. And I don’t know when I’m going to start knowing.”
“In your situation, that would be normal, wouldn’t you say?”
“Normal? I can’t imagine normal ever again.”
“That’s normal, too,” she said.
“Okay.” He took a breath. “I’m going to believe you.” After hesitating, he said, “You know, it’s not impossible that some Homicide inspectors are going to want to talk to you. About you and me.”
“How would they ever have heard about you and me?”
“They’ll be talking to Katie’s friends. Her brother, Daniel. You’ll probably get mentioned by somebody.” He shifted on his stool, and his eyes met hers. “It would probably be better if they didn’t know anything that happened with us.”
“You want me to lie to the police?”
“Not necessarily lie. Maybe omit. They’re going to be looking for a motive, and if they knew that you and I had a thing going on . . .”
Patti flared. “It wasn’t a thing, Hal. I was in love with you. I’m still in love with you. And you still love me.”
Hal’s eyes bored in on a spot on the wall over her shoulder. He let out another breath. “All right.”
“All right, what? Yes? No? What?”
He held up a hand. “The fact is, I was getting back with Katie. I’d made that commitment. I wasn’t planning to leave Katie to be with you. Maybe I should have been, but I wasn’t. That is the real fundamental truth. And if these inspectors come to realize what we had, you and me, they’re going to see a reason why I might have wanted Katie out of the way. So it would be better if they didn’t know.”
Patti sat for a moment in silence. “You know,” she said, “if they really decide they’re going to look, there’s no way they won’t find out.”
“Maybe, but not if—”
She shook her head. “Hal. Think about it. Phone records, restaurant receipts, snoopy neighbors. Things like this always come out, and then everybody looks worse for lying about it to start with. We should tell them what we had and tell them when it ended and stand firm together.”
Hal brought his hands up to his temples, over his forehead, back down to the bar. “The minute I become the unfaithful husband, to the cops and to the world, I’m done. Nothing else is going to matter. Don’t you see that?”
“The unfaithful husband is what you are, Hal. That’s also a fundamental truth. And if I deny it, then when it comes out, and it will, we’re both liars, aren’t we? And that makes both of us look guilty, too. Like I was in with you somehow. Like we planned something. It’s better to tell them up front and just live with it.”