Caroline gently took Natalie’s hands. “No, we’re on yours. Always. But if we’re being honest, we both like Blake. He loves you, and deep down, we know you still love him too.”
“Don’t tell me what I feel,” she said, her hackles rising, almost like her skin had popped out barbed wire to protect herself.
“Maybe you should listen to what he has to say,” Moira said, coming to stand beside Caroline. “He left football for you, after all.”
She shoved away from them, feeling ganged up on, and almost stepped on Touchdown in the process. “I cannot believe this! Tell me the truth. Have you been in touch with Blake since I left him, or did you just talk to him that once?”
When they both looked down rather than meeting her eyes, she wrapped her arms around herself, hoping to ward off the pain spreading through her gut.
“He was worried about you after Kim,” Caroline said. “We all were. So, yes, he would touch base every now and then to make sure you were okay.”
“You betrayed me.”
“No,” Moira said in an even voice. “We never once tried to interfere with you two.”
“But you just told me this is a blessing in disguise,” she said, acid coating the words. “Was anyone else in touch with Blake?”
Her sisters shared a glance.
“Tell me.”
“I know he talked to Mom and Dad and Matt after you left,” Caroline said. “It hurt him to learn what you’d told us about your split…that it was over him not wanting a baby.”
What was wrong with him? How could he still want her back? He had to be off kilter somehow. This…couldn’t be love. “Great. So everyone knows I’m in the wrong.”
“Natalie,” Moira said, taking a deep breath. “No one’s saying that. But Blake was a part of our family for a long time, and we all lost him when you left him. You never understood that.”
“Because he was my husband, and it was my right to leave.” Why couldn’t they understand that she’d had to?
“But he was my friend, and I had a right to talk to him after you dropped him,” Moira said. “He was grieving over Kim too.”
Her cheeks burned now. She knew he had been devastated over losing Kim. But she hadn’t been able to deal with her own feelings, let alone his. “Dropped him? Is that what you think I did?”
Caroline bustled in between them like a referee between two boxing opponents who’d just crossed the line.
“Yes!” Moira answered. “He’s a wonderful guy, and as far as he’s concerned, you hang the moon. Look at everything he’s done to get you back! Look at everything he’s done for you. There aren’t many guys like that. Tell me you’re happier without him, Nat, because I sure as hell haven’t seen evidence of it.”
“Enough!” Caroline shouted, causing Touchdown to whine in the corner. “That’s enough. Everyone obviously has strong feelings about this, so I suggest we take a time-out.”
Her skin felt raw and uncomfortable, as if it had been stripped bare by the ugliness of the past. Inside she was shaking, as much from seeing Blake as from hearing her sisters tell her what they really thought of the situation. “Tell Mom and the others I’m not feeling well today.”
“Natalie—”
“No, Caroline. I need some time to myself after hearing all this. Please go.”
They reached for each other’s hands as they turned to walk toward the door. That small sisterly touch made her chest hurt, and she had to fight the urge to rush over, embrace them, and tell them all was forgiven. That she was a horrible person for what she’d done. To them. To herself. But most of all, to Blake.
But she couldn’t.
If she did, they’d be right, and Blake would have succeeded in scaling her fortress again. She wasn’t about to allow that, whatever his reasons for coming back.
They said goodbye to Touchdown and gave her one last look before they left. Once again, she was alone and numb, unwilling to feel anything. Just like after Kim died.
It was no more than she deserved.
Chapter 4
Andy Hale didn’t always have Saturdays off from rounds at Dare Valley General Hospital, so he made the most of them when he did. Usually he would go on a hike or a bike ride up the canyon with his son, but today Danny was playing with his best friend, Martin, a couple of houses down.
The house wasn’t in the best condition, but then again it never was. Between his long hours as a doctor and his role as a single dad, he didn’t have much time to clean. Hanging out with Danny would always be his priority, and if his kid wanted to play a few video games or read four stories instead of the usual two, well, then that was what they did. Dishes and laundry eventually got done. The lady he’d hired to clean the house once a week kept it from becoming a total pigsty. Sure, he asked Danny to try and clean up after himself, but the kid was only five.