Leah has been staying with me. I can’t stay here alone, without them. I hear her on her cell talking to Brent. He’s been great through all of this. Sacrificing time with his fiancée so that she can be here with me. Leah and Brent, they’re all I have left. Bringing my knees to my chest, I rest my head, letting my mind wonder.
The day after the accident, I had to go to the police station to hear the results of the investigation. Leah had to work, so I went alone. My mind developed a constant string of images from the details the investigator shared with me. I keep seeing their accident play out, and it’s tearing me up inside. Officer Morgan assured me that they didn’t suffer, and died on impact. How in the f*ck is that supposed to make me feel better? Leah has tried to get me to talk to her, but I can’t. It’s bad enough that I see the accident play out in my mind and in my sleep. Every time I close my eyes, the details are on instant replay. Every loud noise causes me to cringe. It consumes me. I can’t talk about it. I refuse to talk about it. She hasn’t pushed me, just hugs me and tells me that she is here for me. I have heard that so many times in the last five days, but Leah is the only one I believe.
Josh showed up that first night, banging on the door, causing all kinds of commotion. Luckily, Brent was here. I’m not sure exactly what he told him. I know he told him about my parents, but I have a feeling he also threated some type of bodily harm. Brent is a big guy, tall about 6’2 and broad shoulders. At first sight, you wouldn’t think of him as a pediatrician. The man is great with kids, and he loves my best friend fiercely. When I asked Leah about his interaction with Josh, she said I need not worry about it. Brent loves her and she loves me, therefore, Brent would never let anything happen to me. I’m not sure what I did to have these two amazing people in my life, but I am, and will be, eternally grateful.
The couch dips; I raise my head to see Leah sitting beside me. She places her hand on my knee. “Can I get you anything?”
“No, thanks.” I haven’t had much of an appetite. “How’s Brent?”
She smiles. “Good. He wanted me to apologize again for rushing out after the service. When you’re a resident, you don’t have much to say about your schedule. Especially since the loss was not immediate family,” she says softly.
“I understand. I don’t know that I would have done this past week without the two of you,” I tell her.
“Well, you don’t ever have to find out,” she says as my cell rings.
I reach for it and look at the screen. “It’s Josh.” This is the first time he has called since the night Brent warned him away. Leah said she saw him in the back of the church during the funeral. I didn’t see him. I didn’t see a lot of people. My mom was an only child and my dad had an older brother who passed away from a heart attack a few years ago. My gran, who just passed a few months earlier, Dad’s mom, was my only living grandparent. I have two cousins and my aunt Brenda who is now re-married. Our family was small, but loving. I grew up always feeling loved and wanted. Now…well, now all I feel is pain in my chest.
“Hey, why don’t you go pack a bag and we’ll head over to my place? We can curl up on the couch and watch movies. Girls night,” she says hopefully.
She seems to always know how I’m feeling. She’s moving away in less than a month. What will I do without her? I need to soak up as much girl time as I can, as it will be a rarity once she moves to Tennessee.
“That actually sounds great. I need to get out of here for a while. Give me five to pack a bag and change.”
“Yay! Okay, I will go finish cleaning up the kitchen and we’ll be all set. I’m thinking take out, pizza maybe?” she asks.
Again, she knows me so well. The kitchen is filled with casseroles, meat trays, vegetable trays, and I don’t even know what else. The thought of consuming any of it makes me ill.
I quickly change and pack a bag. “I’m ready,” I yell to Leah as I make my way down the hall, back to the living room.
“Great, I called and ordered us a pizza, pepperoni and banana pepper. They said forty minutes so we should be there in plenty of time.”
Leah and Brent live in a condo. It’s close to the hospital and only fifteen minutes from my parents’ house. Shit. My house. I fight against the tears that threaten to fall. I turn to gaze out the window, trying to get my emotions in check. Without saying a word, Leah reaches over and grabs my hand. She squeezes tight and continues to drive. She doesn’t make me talk. I love my best friend.
We arrive at the condo just in time. The pizza delivery guy pulls in right behind us. I insist on paying for the pizza, so Leah heads inside to get drinks.
“Marco,” I yell as I enter the condo.
I hear Leah laughing. “Polo,” she yells back through her laughter. When we were kids, we spent hours in the pool at both her house and mine playing that game.
“It’s good to see you smile,” Leah says as I place the pizza box on the coffee table.
“We wore that game out,” I reply. I avoid the fact that my smile has been missing. I don’t want to think about it, and I don’t want to talk about it. Not right now, anyway.
“Well, guess what’s on?” she asks cheerily.
“What?”
“Jeff Dunham.” She laughs just talking about it.
“Sounds good.” It actually sounds damn good. I don’t want a romance, not with my break up with Josh still lingering. I was honestly stressing over what movie we would watch and what emotions it might bring out in me. Kicking back with the comedy channel is just what the doctor ordered.
Leah smiles as she shakes her head and laughs, mimicking the character Peanut. He’s our favorite.
We both have our fill of pizza, which for me was one slice. Leah doesn’t push, but I can tell by the look on her face that she’s concerned. We settle in on the couch, both of us curled up in a throw. I feel myself begin to grow tired as the stress of the last five days catches up with me. It’s not long before sleep claims me.
I wake up with a jolt. I sit up on the couch and survey my surroundings. It takes me a minute to realize I’m on Leah and Brent’s couch. I place my hand over my racing heart, another nightmare.
“Hey, you, you okay?” I hear Leah’s voice. I turn and see that she and Brent are sitting together on the love seat. He’s eating leftover pizza.
“I’m so sorry; I dozed off. What time is it?” I ask.
Leah smiles softly. “Tate, it’s eleven thirty. You slept for four hours.”
“Wow,” is all I can say. Four hours seems like an eternity compared to what I have slept at one time in the last week.
“Tate, I’m glad you’re awake. We were actually just talking about you,” Brent says with a wink. Leah is damn lucky to have found such an amazing guy.
I scoot back on the couch and cross my legs. “Really, do tell,” I retort.
“Well, you see, my new job is going to require me to work a lot of hours. The practice that I’m joining takes on call shifts at the hospital as well as regular office hours.” He reaches for Leah’s hand and laces their fingers together. “My beautiful fiancée will not have to be in a rush to find work. I want her to focus on planning our wedding. She’s not going to know anyone, and I’m afraid she’s going to miss you terribly.”