Taste of Love

chapter Six




Madison was released from the hospital the next day under strict orders from her doctor to take it easy. Austin walked by her side as a nurse pushed her wheelchair to the front doors, where a taxi was waiting for them. Madison had a moment of wondering what it would have been like to be pushed to those doors with a baby in her arms. Neither one said a word, both feeling the solemnity of the moment.

Once back at her apartment, Madison went straight for her bedroom and let the tears fall as soon as she lay down. The guilt was immeasurable. If only she hadn't regretted the pregnancy, maybe she wouldn't have lost the baby. Or, if she had slowed down a little, her body would have been able to accommodate the pregnancy. Maybe she worked too hard. Maybe she didn't get enough sleep. Maybe it happened because she had been so drunk the night the baby was conceived. Maybe she just wasn't meant to be a mother.

All sorts of thoughts flew through her mind, but in the end, none of them mattered. She had still lost her baby.

She heard a soft knock on her door, and wiped her eyes before calling him in. She knew Austin was only trying to help, but there was nothing he could do. There was nothing anyone could do.

"Did you want me to make you anything to eat?" he asked, as he slowly approached the bed. Madison shook her head, so he tried something else. "Draw you a bath?" Again, a negative response.

Austin stood uncertainly by the bed. "You just want me to leave you alone?" It nearly broke his heart to see the look of defeat in her eyes as she nodded.

"Ok, I'll leave you alone, but I'm going to hang around for a little while in case you change your mind and need something." He caressed her cheek and kissed her forehead. "Besides, my cable's out and I need to catch up on a few shows."

She didn't even crack a smile; the blank look remained unchanged. Austin backed out of the room and quietly shut the door behind him. She was so broken, and he didn't know what to do to put her back together again.

By five that evening, Madison still hadn't emerged from her room, and Austin needed to get to the restaurant. As much as he hated to leave her alone, he knew she would be pissed if there was no one there to run her establishment.

Just as he was getting up to tell her he was leaving, he heard a knock on the door. He was surprised to see Cameron on the other side. "Sorry, she's not up to company right now," Austin told him with an edge to his voice, before he let Cameron say anything.

"I'm not exactly company," Cameron protested.

Austin snorted with disdain.

"Can you please just tell her I'm here?" Cameron asked, trying to keep the irritation out of his voice.

Austin sighed and moved aside to let Cameron in. "Wait right here, and I'll see if she wants to see you."

He walked down the hall and knocked lightly on her door. He could hear her sobbing in there, and it made him want to go out and kill Cameron for getting her pregnant in the first place.

He slowly peeked in when he heard her trying to calm herself. "Hey, I just wanted to let you know that I'm heading to the restaurant. Do you want me to stop by after we close?"

"No, I'm alright. I don't need a babysitter." She was starting to get irritated with him, even though she knew he was only trying to help. Then she realized what she had said...babysitter. Her eyes welled up with tears again.

"Okay, I understand. I'll tell Cameron to go too," he said, and turned to leave her bedroom, hoping he could get out quickly before she even noticed what he had said. "I'll talk to you soon, Madison."

"Wait!" she called, and sat up. Austin stopped and cringed before he turned around. "Cameron's here?"

"Yeah, he just got here. I'll show him out, so you can be alone."

"No, tell him to come in." Madison sat upright in bed, straightened her messy hair, and wiped the tears from her cheeks. She knew she still looked horrible, but it would have to do. "Call me later, and let me know how everything is at the restaurant."

Austin nodded and left her room. He glared at Cameron as he walked down the hallway. "Don't do anything to upset her, Music Man." He tried to stare Cameron down for a moment more before he grabbed his coat and walked out the apartment door, slamming it behind him.

Cameron shook his head, then picked up the bags that he had brought with him. He cautiously walked down the hall and entered Madison's bedroom.

"Hey," Madison said. Seeing the hesitant look on his face, she put her hand up, effectively stopping him from saying what she knew he was thinking. "Don't ask how I'm doing, that's pretty obvious. And don't look so scared, it's not like it's the first time you've been in here."

Cameron smiled, thankful for her breaking the ice. "I brought some dinner and a few movies. I know it's not the cuisine that The TigerLily makes, but greasy cheeseburgers, fries, and action movies always make me feel better."

"I thought guys were supposed to bring chick flicks to make the damsel in distress feel better." Madison smiled for the first time that day.

"Well, that's what I've heard, too. I tried to meet somewhere in the middle." He offered the bag of movies to her.

"Let me see how you did," she said, looking inside to see Mission Impossible 2 and Thelma & Louise . She had to admit they were two of her favorites.

"I thought maybe we could have a theme; Mission Impossible 2 for second chances, and Thelma & Louise for friendship, rather than romance," he said, purposely busying himself by taking out the containers of food so that he didn't have to look at her while explaining.

Madison laid a hand on his arm, stopping him. He looked at her. Their eyes met, and she gave him a genuine smile. "I think it's a great idea, Cameron. Thank you."

The tension between them instantly melted. Cameron finished unpacking the food. Madison thought she wouldn't be able to eat anything, but one whiff of the French fries and she was starving. He put in the first movie, and Madison moved over to make room for him on the bed.

And so it was that Madison and Cameron - once bitter enemies -- had a pleasant time watching movies, eating, and getting to know each other.

"You know, for a wild rock star, you're a pretty decent guy," she told him, as they lay side by side on her bed talking after the movies were over.

"Yeah, my mom and my nanny raised me right," he said with a laugh. "Actually, I'll let you in on a little secret."

"Yeah?"

"I'm not all that wild," he whispered.

"Yeah, right. I Googled you, I know your deal."

"No, really. I may be a pain in the ass sometimes and want to get my way, but for the most part, I'm a pretty normal guy. I get a little crazy out on tour, but mostly because it's what fans expect of me, rather than how I really am. Yes, I like to drink and have a good time, but the tabloids make it out to be far worse than it really is."

Madison gave it some thought. "You know...I can almost buy that."

He laughed. "I so rarely get to be myself that sometimes I forget who that is. My mother expects me to be a 'proper young man'; speak properly, walk properly, behave properly. Then my fans expect me to raise hell all the time, but really, I'm just a guy somewhere in between."

Madison nodded. "I can see that," she said. "Think the tabloids would imagine you would show up at a woman's bedside with cheeseburgers and movies and be so nice to her?"

"It's easy to be nice to you," he said.

"Thank you for coming tonight and taking my mind off everything. It means more to me than you could imagine."

Cameron met her eyes. "It meant a lot to me too. I know that I wasn't exactly on board the whole time that you were pregnant, but in my own way, I was beginning to like the idea of being a father."

Madison's eyes began to water at Cameron's admission. He took her chin in his hands. "You're going to get through this. We're going to get through this, together. I am truly sorry for being such a dick before."

She shook her head. "You must hate me. It's my fault," she said, before the waterworks came on full force. "I should have been happier about the baby. I should have slowed down at work. It's my fault that I lost our baby."

Cameron shook his head vehemently and made her look up at him. "No!" he insisted. "It's not your fault in any way. The doctor said that these things happen, and you did nothing wrong. You've got to stop thinking that way. Do you hear me?"

Madison looked up at him.

"I don't blame you," he said with such certainty that there was no choice but to believe him. "I would never, ever blame you."

Seeing that he wasn't lying, and that he didn't blame her, she felt a little weight lifted off her shoulders. "I'm so sorry."

"I know." He pulled her close to him and wrapped his arms around her. He rocked her body with his as the tears kept coming. "I'm sorry too."

The shrill ringing of the phone woke them both from their slumber a few hours later. They both looked at each other and jumped apart as if they'd been pricked. Madison picked up the phone that was next to her bed, and Cameron stood and began collecting the movies that he had brought over.

"Oh, hi, Austin. No, it's alright, we'd...I'd just fallen asleep." After listening to the earpiece for a moment, her face grew rigid. "Yes, he's still here. He came over to help me through a difficult night, not that it's any of your business."

Cameron looked back at her and raised an eyebrow. She rolled her eyes. She listened for a moment, then sighed. "I'm not going to fight with you about this. If I want Cameron here, then he'll be here. End of subject." She rubbed her forehead. "How did business go tonight?"

After Cameron had gathered his things, he motioned to her that he was leaving. Madison held up her hand, stopping him, and told Austin to hold on for a moment. She covered the phone with her hand. "You're leaving?"

"Yeah, I have an early interview in the morning. Besides, I don't want to overstay my welcome. I remember what happened the last time." They smiled at each other. "I'll give you a call, though."

She put the phone down and crawled out of bed, then shyly walked over to him and put her hand on his cheek. She looked into his eyes before kissing him on the cheek. "Thank you, for everything tonight."

Cameron pulled her in for a tight hug, better than any other hug she had ever received. "My pleasure."

He kissed the top of her head before letting her go. Only when she heard the door to the apartment close did she go back and pick up the phone again.



A few days later, Madison felt better after the D&C, and she was ready to get back to work. She was tired of laying around in bed with nothing to do but think about her disappointment.

As she approached her restaurant, she was surprised to see none of her workers milling around in front, waiting for her to open the doors. She was sure that she had told Austin that she'd be back today.

The front door was still locked when she pulled on it, making her wonder if everyone was late. She dug her keys out, then opened the door, muttering to herself about slackers as she turned on the lights. To her surprise, her staff jumped out, laughing and cheering at her shocked expression. A big banner hung behind them, 'Welcome Back Boss' painted with chocolate syrup, made her smile.

"I knew you guys wouldn't let me down while I was gone."

"Not a chance boss. Austin kept us all in line," one of the waiters yelled, sparking even more cheers.

Madison looked around, past all the smiling faces coming to hug her. She took in the ambiance of her restaurant; the cream-colored walls with Tiger Lily orange trimmed wainscot, the Tiger Lily orange tablecloths, with brown cloth napkins, and the fresh Tiger Lily bouquet centerpieces at every table. Everything within these walls made her smile. This was where she needed to be; with her staff, with her customers, inside her restaurant - her source of inspiration and happiness. She could feel her zest for life returning.