“Not brave. Just necessary.”
He tipped her chin up to face him. “Sometimes, that’s the same thing, Emma.”
“I wasn’t always there for her and she turned wild. I wanted to be free, so I didn’t see the trouble she was in until it was too late.”
Greedy Emma had resented the motherhood thrust upon her by absent relatives and negligent foster parents. She wanted to be a crazy, irresponsible teen and Daisy had paid the price. Run with the wrong crowd, flirted with catastrophe.
“You’re not your sister’s keeper. Time to start thinking of yourself, about what you need.” Her eyes met his, stark vulnerability and undeserved affection shining from them.
“That’s what got us into trouble in the first place.”
“This pride of yours, it’s admirable as all get-out, but there has to come a point in your life where you admit you need a hand. Pain might be necessary, but suffering is optional. Are you going to let me be the f*ck
ing man here and help my woman?”
My woman. Those words seized her heart with a fierce joy. But he didn’t get it. If she accepted that money, it would always be between them. This leaden lump chaining them to her shame and debt. And Ray would want more.
“I’m not a good person, Brody. You don’t know the things I’ve done, the life I’ve led. I thought if I wore a baggy suit and styled my hair differently I could be someone else. Hide her away. But in that club, when you came in, she came back with a vengeance.” The words gushed out of her, taking every last breath of hope with them. “When you walked out of that shower, my name still fresh on your lips, this greedy bitch came out to play. I’m selfish and—”
He swallowed her protest with a kiss. “I never want to hear you speak like that about yourself. You had a tough time as a kid and you made the best of it. Before you diagnose yourself with low self-esteem, first make sure that you’re not, in fact, just surrounded by ass*ole
s. You need better-quality people in your life.”
He applied another soothing kiss to her temple. It turned her on more than if he’d made some glorious, dirty-talking demand.
“You might have screwed up, but that doesn’t make you a screwup. That résumé you just recited? Be proud. Be proud of every step you’ve taken to make your life better and stop blaming yourself for what happened in that club. You drove me crazy with desire in your unfashionable suit and your terrible hairstyle and your sensible shoes. And when I saw you with that banging body calling my name before I even knew who you were, I was already on the hook. Had been for months while I fantasized about taking you a million different ways. My body knew the score. What we did was hot and sexy, and I refuse to be ashamed of feeling that damn good. Tell me you don’t regret it.”
She deserved censure for inciting him to lose his mind, yet here he was shouldering the blame. Her whole life, she had never once thought she should be cherished this way. That she deserved to be a participant in life instead of merely an observer.
“Say it, Emma,” he whispered, the words loaded with longing. With dangerous promise. “Say you don’t regret it. You don’t regret us.”
The words stalled in her throat, refused to go the distance. She drew him to the lounger, coasted a hand over his hip, and cupped his ass, pulling him over her. Wild for the weight of him on her, needing to feel its solidity anchoring her in place. The pleasure she felt at being open to him and being seen whipped through her.
He made short work of her clothes. Already wet and hot for him, she parted her legs, accepting him into her body, stealing his strength for her own. She scratched at his ass, dug her nails, trying to draw out his beast. But instead, he gave her something else. Not Brody unleashed, but an aching honesty that matched hers. Each thrust brought her closer to release and sealed their connection.
“You won’t say it, then I’ll say it for you.” He slammed into her. “Me inside you. This is the truth, your truth. Not what you were before.” He withdrew and stroked again. Long, thick, consuming. His mouth, set to torture, claimed hers and destroyed every last barrier. “It’s this honesty you show me when I’m inside you. Nothing else matters. Just this.”
On his face was a look of such tenderness it gave her no place to hide. Love for him bloomed in her chest, and with each pump of his powerful hips, she recited an internal mantra.
No regrets. No regrets.
Because no matter how it ended, she would never forget that he loved her with his body and his acceptance, even if he’d never said the words.
Chapter Nineteen
Brody stood outside the door of his bathroom like a creeper listening to Emma butcher “Love Is a Battlefield.” He smiled down at his new socks, courtesy of Snoopy on the left, Woodstock on the right, then spared a glance for Kevin, who was eying the yellow bird with interest.