“Come back to bed,” he repeated.
“Really, I’m…” I trailed off because I saw the covers get thrown back, then I saw his naked chest in the city lights coming in from the window and the sight put me into a deeper mesmerization than the TV had. So deep, I didn’t know what he was doing until I was in his arms and he was walking back to the bed. He dumped me there somewhat unceremoniously (as in he dropped me and I bounced) and then he effectively shoved me deeper into the bed because I scooted away from his knee as he got in with me.
He was settling the covers over us when he repeated, “Like I said, come to bed.”
“You don’t want me here,” I advised.
He ignored my comment and asked, “What woke you up?”
“Sorry?”
“Why do you wake up?”
“Stuff drifts through my brain, wakes me up.”
“What?”
“Lots of stuff.”
“What was it tonight?”
Good God, I couldn’t tell him that.
“Just… I want Dad to be okay. I was pretty incommunicado while I was roaming, sorting through my head, needing to be alone and find what I was looking for. I knew Mom and him and Caroline were worried. Really worried. I’d reconnected lately but the last time I talked to Dad was via e-mail,” I lied. “I want to hear his voice.” This was not a lie He honed into exactly what most concerned me.
“You aren’t responsible for your father’s heart attack, babe.”
“And you aren’t responsible for Tonia’s death, babe.”
That shut him up.
We were face to face but his face was shadowed, only his shoulder and arm that was on top of the covers were visible in the lights coming from windows.
“Go back to sleep, Tate, I’ll be okay,” I whispered.
He ignored me again. “What keeps you up?”
“What keeps me up?”
“Yeah, if shit sifts through your brain waking you up, what keeps you up?”
“It keeps sifting through my brain.”
“You can’t shut it down?”
“No.”
He fell silent.
“Tate,” I said, “I’ve tried everything. Sleep aids. Counting sheep. Relaxation techniques. Nothing works but I’m used to it.”
“The mind’s a powerful thing.”
“Yes,” I said softly.
“Your Dad’s gonna be okay, Ace.”
“I hope so,” I whispered.
We both fell silent and this lasted awhile.
Then, quietly, just in case he fell back to sleep, I said, “Everything you did today was nice.”
“Babe,” he muttered.
“Did I wake you again?”
“No.”
Well thank goodness for that.
I kept talking. “Thank you for coming all the way out here with me.”
“It’s just a day.”
“Still,” I said, “you didn’t have to do it.”
“State you were in, you’d end up in Alaska.”
That startled a giggle out of me.
Then I protested, “I would not.”
“Babe, seriously, you were a robot without any programming.”
I had to admit I kind of was.
“Told you Dad was the strong one,” I reminded him.
He had no response.
“I’ll pay you back for the tickets,” I whispered.
“We’ll talk about it later.”
I ignored him this time. “Yours too.”
“Lauren, we’ll talk about it later.”
“They had to cost a whack.”
“You speak English, you just don’t hear it,” he stated.
“All right, we’ll talk about it later,” I yielded.
We fell silent again. This lasted a long time, so long, I heard Tate’s breathing go even and I knew from experience with listening to Brad sleep he was out.
I rolled to my other side and the instant I did, Tate’s arm came out and hooked me at the waist, pulling me back into his body.
“Tate?” I called, super quiet.
“Mm?” he replied.
“You asleep?” I was still being quiet.
“No,” he replied.
If he wasn’t asleep then why did he pull me into him?
“Um…” I mumbled.
“Your hair smells good.”
“It does?”
“Yeah.”
Wow. He thought my hair smelled good. That was nice.
I decided to ignore that and how nice it was.
“Why aren’t you asleep?” I asked.
“’Cause I got a woman in bed with me who won’t shut up,” he answered.
“Oh,” I whispered then pointed out, “I was quiet awhile ago.”
“This is true,” he murmured.
“So why aren’t you asleep?”
He was silent.
“Tate?”
He sighed then he said, “You smell good, babe.”
“I do?”
“You feel good too.”
Uh-oh.
“Tate –”
“Just be quiet, Lauren.”
I decided to go with that.
“Okay,” I whispered.
We were both quiet a long time and I was about to fall back asleep in the curve of his arm with his warm body at my back when he called my name.
“Laurie?”
“Yes,” I muttered, my voice sleepy.
“I was pissed last night.”
“I know.”
“You look good.”
“Sorry?”
“No way you can look like all the rest.”
My eyes shot open.