I allowed that smile to escape; my face lit up on hearing this news. Leaning my head to rest on his arm, I confirmed, “Of course not. They love you too.” Flame’s arm tensed, then gradually relaxed.
As we broke through the line of trees, AK and Viking were waiting by their bikes, both smoking. When we reached them, Viking sat up and withdrew the cigarette from his mouth. “Fuck me, Little One…” he trailed off as he pointed his finger at me from head to foot with his cigarette. “You, and fucking leather, are a match made in cowhide heaven.”
Flame’s muscles went rigid at the comment, but before he could move forward, AK grabbed Viking’s arm and reminded him, “Just because the brother ain’t cutting shit outta himself no more, don’t mean he can’t fucking cut you. Now ante up, dumb ass. We’re outta here.”
Flame attached my bag to his bike, then climbed on. I climbed on behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist. Flame started his engine. Just before we set off, he turned his head and pressed his lips to mine in the briefest of kisses.
As he pulled out onto the dirt road, I placed my chin on his shoulder and whispered, “I love you too.”
*****
We rode for two days. We camped out last night, and would do so again tonight. My body ached with the unfamiliarity of riding on a bike. Every time I wanted to stop, every time I wanted to return home, I reminded myself that this was all for Flame. It was his best hope for the peace he had afforded me. He too deserved peace. And every time I repeated this mantra to myself, I could rise above the aches, the numbness, and the pain.
The fear of what lay ahead.
Night had fallen, the stars were bright and glittering against the backdrop of an ink black sky. Flame veered left onto a secluded and dark country road. I held him tighter as the bike jiggled over the graveled path. Then my tiring eyes widened as they landed on a wide lake. The full moon hung in the sky and cast bright beams of light, which shimmered on the still water.
Flame drove us a little bit further into the coverage of the trees, then slowly drew the bike to a halt. My thighs throbbed with the long hours of sitting in the same position. Flame moved off the bike first, then turning round, he lifted me off the saddle. His strong arms held me in the air, and as he placed me down on the crisp ground, he pulled me to his lips. When he broke away from my mouth, my cheeks filled with heat.
Flame’s leather-gloved hands lifted and his finger brushed over the apple of my cheek. “You liked that I did that,” he rasped. It was a statement he now knew to be true.
Turning my head to greet his hand, I replied, “I like it more every time you do it.”
Flame leaned down and kissed me again. My hands lifted to wrap around his neck. This time when he pulled back, he said, “Then I’ll do it more.”
“Yo, Flame! I got a fire going, and I’m grilling. Let’s eat, then get some shuteye. We got to hit the address Tanner got us for your old man by early morning. We all know it’s gonna be some fucking day,” Viking called from near the water.
We ate in near silence by the fire. Afterwards, Flame laid out a pallet for us to sleep upon. He pulled me into his arms as soon as our exhausted bodies hit the makeshift bed. In a matter of minutes I could hear the heavy breathing of AK and Viking, sleeping at the other side of the fire. But Flame’s tense body, and his quick inhales and exhales, betrayed that he was awake.
Feeling his heart race, I raised my head and lay over his chest to meet his eyes. Flame had been staring at the cloudless sky, but when he felt me move, he looked to me. He was troubled.
Lifting my finger to run across the worry lines on his forehead, I asked, “What is wrong?”
Flame’s lips parted and a slow controlled breath poured out. His arms threaded around my back and held me impossibly close. At first I did not think he was going to speak then, unexpectedly, he confessed, “I’ve killed before.”