“Okay.”
I leaned down and kissed her as I started moving my hips slowly. She was still tight, almost tight enough to cause me pain. I worked slowly, stretching her so that both of us were comfortable.
I worked her that way until I couldn’t handle it anymore. I needed to go faster. Instincts took over as I started thrusting harder and deeper, fighting my own body for control. She moaned as she wrapped her legs around my waist, allowing me to go deeper. I still held back, afraid that I would hurt her.
“Jesse, faster. I need it faster.”
I groaned as I started thrusting faster. I couldn’t keep this up much longer, but I didn’t want to come without her.
“I can’t hold back, baby. I have to go harder.”
“I’m okay. Go ahead.”
I let go, allowing pure instinct to take over, as I thrust hard and fast into her, over and over. She clung to me as she squeezed her legs tighter around me. Sweat dripped off of my nose and onto her, running down her cheek. Our bodies were both covered in sweat as we worked together. She screamed out my name as she came, and I let go. I gave one final thrust deep inside her as I came. Her muscles squeezed me until I wanted to scream in both pleasure and agony.
This girl was going to be the death of me.
I kept my weight on my elbows as my head dropped to her shoulder. I was exhausted, but I didn’t want to crush her.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
I raised my head to look at her. “I think that’s supposed to be my line.”
She smiled. “Whoops, sorry.”
“I’m fine. That was fun.” I pulled out and rolled to my side.
“It was. Thank you for being so gentle with me. I know that had to be hard for you.”
“Not at all. I didn’t want to hurt you. I feel like an asshole for hurting you as much as I did.”
“You were as easy as you could be.”
I kissed her nose before I stood up. “I’ll be right back.” “Where are you going?” she asked.
“I need to clean up.”
I walked to the bathroom and threw the condom away. I made sure to wrap it in toilet paper, so no one would notice it. I grabbed a washcloth and wet it with warm water before returning to her room. She was still on the bed in the exact same spot that I’d left her in. Her eyes were closed, but she opened them as I nudged her legs apart and started wiping away the small amount of blood that was there.
“Thank you,” she whispered.
I threw the washcloth in the hamper in her room before lying down on the bed beside her. “No thanks needed.”
“I think I’m falling for you,” she said as she laid her head on my chest.
“I kind of figured that after you let me do that to you a few minutes ago.”
She propped herself up on her elbow and smacked my bare chest with her free hand. “That’s not what I meant. The deeper I get in with you, the harder I fall. I think I’m falling in love with you.”
For once in my life, I was speechless. I had no idea how to respond to that. Do I care a lot about her? Damn straight. But do I love her? I have no idea. The thought of loving someone scared me.
“You don’t have to say it back or anything. I just wanted you to know,” she said quietly.
“I’m not sure what to say. I’ve never even considered the possibility of loving someone. I care a lot about you, but I’m not sure I’m ready to say that to you.”
“I understand. If you ever do feel that way, please don’t hide it from me.
I promise that I won’t ever hurt you.”
I kissed her forehead. “I know. I can’t say I love you yet, but I can tell you that you’re the closest I’ve ever let myself get to someone.”
“That means a lot, especially coming from someone like you.”
We were both silent as I held her close. I had no idea what was happening, but I did know that things were changing. I could see it happening right before my eyes. And for a split second, I wasn’t scared of it.
––––––––
Sometime later, I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing. Emma was still sound asleep beside me. I slid my arm out from under her and climbed from the bed. My phone was on the dresser, and I grabbed it just as it stopped ringing. I unlocked it to see three missed calls from my mom and one from Andy. I had several unread text messages, too—most of them from my mom and one from Andy, reminding me about the party tonight.
After sending him a quick reply to let him know that Emma and I were still planning on being there, I opened the ones from my mom. They had all been sent within the last two hours. I glanced at the time and cursed. It was almost noon, and Emma wasn’t at school.
Mom: Call me.
Another one had been sent only a few minutes after the first.
Mom: I need to talk to you about something. Please call me.
There were several others like this. The last one had been sent minutes ago.