“Shh,” Lauren said. “Here they come. Act natural.”
I tried not to snort—nothing in my life seemed natural right now. Was Mom right? Should I keep this a secret? I tried to imagine doing pedicures in a hospital room or watching scary movies with machines beeping around us. I couldn’t picture Ally reading Cosmo quizzes while I wore pajamas instead of a bikini. Hillary wouldn’t be able to sunbathe topless, and I doubted there would be space to recreate the dance numbers from her favorite musicals. Scenes we watched over and over until we had all the steps mastered or collapsed into giggles. Lauren might mind less—she wouldn’t have to worry about burning. Except she never could sit still. Being trapped in a room would drive her—and by extension us—crazy.
“Natural,” Lauren repeated in a whisper before amping up her smile.
Hil rolled her eyes and asked, “Mia, are we still going to the mall later?” When I gave her a blank look, she added, “Remember? To get you a bikini that fits?”
“I can’t.” I pulled my fork through my salad, poking at things but not eating much.
“I’ll go,” Lauren offered as Ryan Winters, Chris Matherson, and Bill Samuels reached us. “Hey.”
Chris and Bill sat by Hil, then commandeered Lauren’s fries. Ryan waited next to me, his face a display of amusement framed by dimples.
“Any room for me?” he asked when I didn’t get the hint. I blushed and moved down the bench.
Hil scoffed, “God, Mia, how much did you drink last night? I thought I was hungover, but you’re a total space case today.”
I forced a smile. “Too much.”
Ryan acknowledged the lie by squeezing my knee under the table. He’d spent last night offering to switch my water for “something more interesting,” and I’d declined each time. His blue eyes appraised me with a look that made me feel naked, both physically and emotionally. A dimple flickered onto his left cheek as he gave me his half grin—the one that made me want to find us a secluded corner.
“Where’d you go last night, anyway?” Chris asked.
“Yeah, and where have you been all week?” Lauren added. “You’ve been totally M.I.A. since that afternoon at your pool. Get it? M.I.A.? Mia?”
Ally laughed a little, the rest of us nodded and groaned. No matter how lame the joke, I was grateful it changed the focus of the conversation—no one seemed to remember I hadn’t answered either question. The first one was innocent enough, but Gyver and my friends ran in different circles; it never went well when I tried to combine them.
“I thought I heard someone say bikini shopping? Can I come?” Ryan teased. His smile settled on me like whiskey, making me feel warm and tipsy.
“I can’t. My mom wants to do something.”
“So? Cancel,” suggested Chris.
“Can’t. You don’t know how she gets if she feels ignored.” The girls nodded and Ally added, “Totally understand. It’s fine.”
Hil asked, “What time do you want us over tomorrow, Summer Girl? It’s perfect pool weather.”
I studied my salad, looking for clues among the lettuce and carrots, but the vegetables didn’t give me any signs. “Sorry, I’m busy.”
“It’s summer! What are you doing, and why aren’t we invited?” Lauren asked.
“What am I doing?” I couldn’t look at her, so I gazed over her shoulder at the elderly couple in the next booth. “My mom and I are going to Connecticut to visit my grandparents.”
“Lame,” said Bill.
“Yeah. Sorry I can’t play pool princess.”
“When will you be back?” asked Ally.
“I don’t know.”
“But I leave for the shore tomorrow,” Ryan protested.
“And you think you’d be Mia’s priority, because …?” Hil had hooked up with Ryan first, back in freshman year. She hated that we were together—well, not together—but she hated the idea of us. I couldn’t tell if she was protective of me or territorial of him. Probably protective; Hil had Mama Bear down to an art form. Even at her bitchiest, Hil was unfailingly loyal.
“Watch the claws, Hil.” Chris grinned across the table at Ryan. “This summer’s gonna be off the hook. Beaches full of bikinis? I’ll be practicing my mouth-to-mouth all day and all night.”
I tried not to imagine Ryan’s golden hair lightening in the sun as his abs and shoulders darkened, his blue eyes scoping bikinis, his oh-so-tempting lips pressed against someone else’s.
Hil spun toward Chris. “You’re disgusting. I can’t believe you two were hired as lifeguards. I would not feel safe swimming on your beaches.”
Ryan downed half my Diet Coke. “Then you don’t have to come visit.”
Chris added, “But there’s plenty of room at Beach Casa Matherson for lovely ladies who are ready to party and have fun.” He and Bill banged knuckles with self-satisfied nods.
“Be fair. You know Hil gets cranky when she’s hungover. And we’ll totally be there. Maybe we can drive down Friday,” said Lauren. “You’ll be back by then, right, Mia?”