Rock and a Hard Place

chapter 19

Julie Orman flipped through paperwork in her office when the secretary popped her head in. “Hey Julie, I’ve got another cal about Libby Sawyer, can you take it?”

“Sure, send it over. It’s probably from the state.” Julie stil stressed over the way everything had gone down for Libby. The poor kid couldn’t catch a break and there was no way for her to help. Her phone buzzed with the new cal.

“Helo, this is Julie Orman.”

“Hi, Miss Orman, I was hoping you could help me. I’m trying to find a girl who recently went to your school. Her name is Libby.

Libby Sawyer.”

Julie sat back, a bit startled. The voice on the other end sounded like a teenage boy, certainly not a social worker from the state.

“Excuse me, who’s caling?”

“I’m a friend of Libby’s.” The voice tinged with hope. “She and I had a misunderstanding and then I heard she left town. I’ve been trying everything I can think of to track her down, but no one wil help me.”

Julie warmed to the boy, wondering who he was, perhaps a friend from Libby’s old school or a cousin?

“I’m sorry, the school isn’t alowed to give out student information, particularly in a situation like hers.”

“Please, you have to help me. I’ve talked to people in Milwaukee, at the Department of Family Services, Child Welfare and the foster system. No one wil tel me anything. I didn’t know where else to cal.”

His desperation touched her. He was obviously distraught and had exhausted al his options.

“I’d like to help you, I truly would. Libby was a special student to me, but you seem to already know as much as I do. The only people they’l release information to are her parents or guardians.”

She heard his defeated exhale. “You aren’t family, are you?” she asked.

“No,” his weary voice answered. “I’m her boyfriend.” Julie sat up and leaned closer to the phone.

“What is your name?” she asked, stunned to learn that Libby truly did have a boyfriend.

“Peter. Peter Jamieson.”

Julie nearly dropped the phone. “Oh God.”

“Excuse me?” He asked politely.

“Libby told me about you.” Guilt overwhelmed her. “You wouldn’t happen to be . . .”

“In a band? Yeah.”

“Oh shit.” She dropped her head forward, while grasping the phone against her ear.

He laughed. “Is that a bad thing?”

“No, I’m so sorry.” Julie couldn’t believe this. “Libby told me about you a few times, but I didn’t believe her. Her situation is . . .

unusual. I was convinced she dreamt you up.”

“Yeah, we aren’t the most obvious couple. Listen, I realy need to know if she’s okay. Do you know where her dad is? Did they find him? Is she with him?”

“No, they haven’t been able to locate him. I wish they had, I’m sure he’d be worried sick. Since you know she’s been put in the system already, I’m not breaking any rules. But that’s al I know. I’m sure she’s doing fine. It’s got to be better than where she was at.” Julie hoped she spoke the truth. “I wish I could help, I realy do. I have no authority to locate her. My hands are tied.

There’s just no way I can to get access to her records.” A heavy silence weighed between them, his despair palpable.

“Listen, sometimes we get information, or a student comes back. Libby and I had a bit of connection. It’s possible she might contact me some time. If she does, I can have her get a hold of you.

Or if I hear any news, I can let you know.” She hoped this would at least lessen his pain.

“That would be awesome. Thank you. You don’t know how great that is to hear.”

“Wel, it’s a long shot, I may never hear from her.”

“But you might, and it’s the best news I’ve heard in weeks.” He gave her his cel number and their manager’s office number too.

“We’re on our European tour, so I might not get your cal. But leave a message, it’l catch up to me. Miss Orman, I can’t thank you enough.”

His spirits seemed much improved and that cheered her as wel. At least one other person out there supported Libby.

“No problem, I’m happy to do anything I can to help her.” The school bel rang ending the class period.

“I’ve got go, but Peter, thanks for caling and good luck on your tour.”

“Thanks.”

Julie gently placed the phone back in the cradle and walked into the main office. “You aren’t going to believe this,” she said to the secretary.



# # #

The sound check dragged on. Peter sat on a stool mid-stage waiting as the engineers made adjustments. Each minute felt like an hour. He glanced up and noticed Adam and Garrett gesturing back and forth. When they noticed him watching, both froze.

“What?” Peter asked irritated.

“Nothing,” Garrett said.

“We have something to show you,” Adam confessed. “But we don’t want to upset you.”

“What are you talking about?” he asked.

“You’ve been about to rip our heads off the past week,” Adam answered.

“Yeah, wel. Sorry,” Peter said, not meaning it. “Can we do it later?”

“No, we can’t,” Garrett stated, impatient. He spoke into his mic, “Hey Brian, play that video now, wil ya?” Peter saw concern in both his brothers eyes, as they watched him. Each held an acoustic guitar.

The lights in the arena dimmed. Garrett and Adam started to play.

An image of Libby, larger than life, filed the giant screens on each side of the stage. A smile lit her beautiful face, her blue eyes sparkled. Next came a picture of them talking, heads close as if sharing a secret. At first confused, as he’d never seen the pictures before, Peter realized Adam’s voyeuristic ways with his camera finaly paid off. A few seconds later another image appeared, this time of him and Libby sitting on the large boulder at Parfrey’s Glen.

Her long blonde hair blew in the breeze. Light freckles sprinkled her cheeks and a look of utter contentment shown on her face.

Transfixed, Peter moved across the stage for a direct view, never taking his eyes off the screen. Photo after photo appeared before him. Many showed the two of them together laughing, al with the beautiful backdrop of Parfrey’s Glen.

As the images continued to materialize across the screen, his brothers played an achingly familiar tune. The song he wrote for Libby. “Angel Kisses.”

Peter released a breath. He must have been holding it for days. This was their tribute to her, for him. Garrett and Adam never understood how much he cared about her until she was torn away.

When the song ended, a final photo filed the screen of the two of them walking through a field at the nature preserve. Her hand held firmly in his, she looked up at him with total trust and admiration. Every emotion was revealed on her face. She gazed adoringly, her love pouring out.

He missed her with every ounce of his soul, but now he had a bit of her back. Her image remained on the screen after the music ended.

Adam stepped next to him. “I thought you might like this. We could play your song with this video playing in the background.” Garrett stepped beside him and placed a firm hand on his shoulder. “I’ve been a jerk and I realize I was wrong. I didn’t realize how much she meant to you. I guess I was a jealous of how close you two were. I took her away from you and that was wrong.

Here’s a little bit of her back. It might give you a reason to want to sing again.” Garrett’s eyes searched Peter’s. Peter saw the heartfelt remorse from his brother, he nodded his forgiveness.

Peter folded his arms across his chest, one hand covering his face. He hoped he could hold the emotions in, but failed.

“Yeah, I’d like that,” his voice cracked. Maybe his brothers weren’t so bad after al.



# # #

Libby tried to cry for help, but didn’t get a chance. Juanita grabbed her by the hair and slammed her face against the wal. Then she grabbed her arm and twisted it behind her back, causing a piercing pain to shoot up Libby’s arm and shoulder. Juanita shoved her against the sandy textured paint, scraping her face raw.

“Listen bitch, don’t you ever cross me again. If you say one more word to Scott about me, I’l break your f*ckin’ arm.” Libby didn’t doubt it for a moment. Paralyzed with pain she tried not to breathe. She prayed for Juanita to release her. The girl was crazy. She bit back her tears.

“And when I say something’s mine, you just shut your whiny little trap and mind your own business.”

Thankfuly, Libby saw Scott, their twenty-three year old

‘adult in charge,’ walk around the corner, surprised. He rushed over.

“Juanita, what are you doing? Let go of her.”

“Just having a little chat here. Libby had a crick in her back and I’m trying to straighten her out.” Her vise-like grip tightened.

“Let her go. Right now!” His raised voice brought Darnel and BJ from the kitchen.

“Shit girl, whad ya do to piss off the Latina lunatic?” Darnel chewed on a Pop Tart as he spoke.

BJ looked on, a satisfied smirk on his big dumb face.

“Feeling better now?” Juanita asked getting up in Libby’s face.

“Yeah.” She responded through clenched teeth. “Great.”

“Juanita, I said now!” Scott yeled.

Juanita stuck her elbow in Libby’s back before releasing her.

“Anytime you need a little adjustment, let me know.” Libby leaned against the wal for support, unable to bear the pain of straightening her arm. Slowly she relaxed enough for the limb to fal useless at her side. With her other hand she pushed away from the wal, her cheek aching and bruised, the wal marred with streaks of blood.

“Juanita, you’re kiling me here. I thought you weren’t going to alow your temper to get out of control,” Scott said, this situation beyond his limited skil set.

“Yeah, wel, it sneaks out once in a while. I’m sorry, it’l never happen again.”

“You’re right about that.” Scott said, shaking his head at her.

“Damn chica! You goin back to juvie. It’s three strikes and you’re out. Wel you’re out baby.” Darnel taunted, happy as a clam.

“I’m afraid he’s right,” Scott wrung his hands. “I’ve got to cal this in.”

“Yeah, what the f*ck?” Juanita spat at Scott. “You’re such a p-ssy. You need to grow some.”

“Juanita go sit in the kitchen while I handle this. BJ please stay with her while I talk to Libby.”

Scott checked Libby for injuries and congratulated her for trying to get a peaceful resolution. Apparently not fighting back or defending yourself qualified as good behavior. He told her to shower and clean off the sand and paint ground into her face.

Today she could go in to school late. Yippee. She was sick and tired of being pushed around.

After her shower, she gave a report to the police about Juanita stealing her Jamieson CD. Narking seemed like a lame reason to be pummeled against a wal, but the CD was one of the few belongings she had left that tied her to Peter. She refused to put up with Juanita’s constant bulying anymore.

In fact, she was done taking everybody’s crap. She’d spent nearly two years doing what everyone else told her to. She’d been the model orphan child. No more! She’d been lied to, misled, and manipulated. There was no one left who cared about her; they’d al left or been taken away. Feeling sorry for herself wouldn’t help either. It was time to stand up for herself and move forward, not cower in submission as other people made bad decisions for her.

Today this madness stopped. She refused to sit in this crappy house and get bulied and beat up. She’d been afraid for so long.

That ended today. She decided to take back her life. Sink or swim, she’d do it on her own. She knew she could.

The decision made, Libby moved through her room with purpose. She dumped the schoolbooks and papers out of her backpack and kicked them under the bed. She went to the dresser and surveyed the contents. She grabbed a pair of jeans, three warm tops, a couple pair of socks and underwear, an extra bra. Then she puled a thick sweatshirt over the one she already wore. She dropped her makeup bag into the backpack, then puled it back out. It took up too much space. She opened the bag, grabbed blush and mascara, dropped them into the pack and left the rest on the dresser.

She cushioned the picture of her family by wrapping it inside a t-shirt and then placed it in the middle of the pack. She moved around the room, scanning each item for something she might need in her future life. Nothing.

Her eyes settled on her narrow bed. Without pause, she went to the far side and reached deep between the mattress and box spring. She puled out a bank envelope ful of money she stashed from her job. She counted one hundred and fifty-three dolars, not nearly enough. She stuffed the cash in her back pocket. She opened the closet and examined the contents, a few shirts, several pair of shoes and the dress from homecoming that Miss Orman refused to take back. She left it al. She needed nothing from this place.

She looked at Juanita’s side of the room. Clothes littered the floor and the bed was unmade. She hesitated only a moment, then moved to the dresser and worked her way, drawer by drawer.

Bingo!

Inside the second drawer, lay her Jamieson CD in its cracked case; she tucked it in her bag. In the next drawer she found an empty cigarette container, inside of which she discovered a thick wad of bils and a couple of joints. She dumped the filthy drugs into the drawer and scanned the bils, a couple hundred dolars. She thought twice about taking the loot, but figured Juanita probably stole it to begin with, or earned it seling drugs. It made sense that dirty money would help her now.

Satisfied, she checked the hal. She heard Scott on the phone in the kitchen. Libby stepped quietly to the front door and grabbed his warm gloves off the table. She needed these more than he did.

She exited the front door, puling it quietly shut. She stood on the front porch and took one long deep breath. Libby Sawyer was finished, dead to her. She walked away from the house and never looked back.

My life begins, today.