“Wow,” I whispered, somehow moved by the experience, feeling for some strange reason it was the most intimate moment with another human being I’d had in my life.
I felt a movement of his lips at my neck and I was pretty certain he smiled. Then I snuggled my behind into him and I heard him groan again. I smiled to myself in the dark and believe it or not, wrapped tight in Luke’s arms, Luke still inside me, I immediately fell back to sleep.
*
I was in my usual morning position, tucked into Luke’s side, arm around his abs, leg thrown over his thighs when Luke woke me by tilting up my chin and kissing me.
Then he rolled me to my back. Then his mouth moved down my body. Then it was between my legs.
After he made me finish, he came up over me and he finished.
All of this was done without a word.
When it was over, Luke stayed where he was, his bodyweight pressing me into the bed. One of my legs was bent, foot on the bed, inside thigh pressed against his hip. The other leg wrapped around his thigh, my arms around him, hands idly sliding across his skin and muscle.
His face was buried in my neck, his mouth moving there with no purpose or intent, just a post doing the nasty affectionate touch, a sexy post doing the nasty affectionate touch.
My hands slid up his back. “I have to brush my teeth,” I whispered.
His head came up and he looked down at me, eyes ink, and he stared at me one beat, two then three then more. I didn’t know why he kept looking at me. What I did know was that his face looked less hard than normal, partly with satisfaction, partly with something else I couldn’t decipher.
Okay to be perfectly honest, I didn’t want to decipher.
Goddamn.
Finally I said softly, “Luke.”
He gave me a half-grin and even in a lying position I felt my knees wobble.
There I was, lying in bed, Luke on top of me, still inside me, my limbs wrapped around him.
Hell and damnation.
How did I let this happen?
What happened to my vow?
How was I ever going to go back to my vibrators now?
I took my arms from around him and shoved his shoulders. “Get off.”
The grin turned full-fledged, he bent his head, touched my lips with his and then rolled off.
I hightailed to the bathroom.
Crapity, crap, crap, crap.
Now how was I going to get out of this mess?
I couldn’t just get on a spaceship and float around the earth. That was too close. I needed to beam to another galaxy. Since Star Trek technology wasn’t possible in the non-TV realm, I decided I needed to find a plastic surgeon and have my face altered so I was unrecognizable and move to Guadalajara for good measure.
Then I realized I was naked in the bathroom and had nothing with me to put on.
I was such a dork.
A black, zip up sweatshirt was hanging on the back of the door and I fell on it like a starving man at a feast. I zipped it on and looked in the mirror.
I’m happy, Good Ava told me, grinning like a loon. This is what we’ve ALWAYS wanted.
Bad Ava had her arms crossed, was scowling and she was strangely silent. But I knew what she was thinking.
I did my morning business and walked out of the bathroom. Luke, naked (and looking fine by the way), was heading toward it as I walked out. He nabbed me at the waist, pulled me in for a quick, hard kiss then let me go and went into the bathroom.
I stared at the door in a mini-Luke Lip Fog for a few beats. Then I found my underwear, pulled them on and wondered what to do.
I needed to get out of there and soon. I needed to find a quiet place to let my head explode. I needed to shove all this down, bury it, forget it happened.
Bad Ava’s unspoken advice was the only thing I could think of. I needed to find a way out before this all turned to shit. Like it always turned to shit.
Always.
Instead of doing any of that, I went to the kitchen, nabbed a diet, tidied the cookies, put away the forgotten in the sex-a-thon last night groceries and started to make toast.
Luke came out when I slid down the lever on the slices of bread. I heard him moving around but I stared at the toaster as if I was certain it would animate and start dancing around like all the stuff in the Beast’s house in that Disney movie and I didn’t want to miss the show.
He came up behind me, wrapped his arms around me and touched his lips to my neck. This felt good. Sweet, nice, intimate and wonderful.
Ava, Bad Ava’s sharp voice was a warning.
What? Good Ava asked innocently, as far as I’m concerned, Luke could hold us all day.
Fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck.
“You want toast?” I asked, not moving my eyes from the toaster.
He moved closer. I pressed against the counter, he pressed against me.
“Yeah,” he said against my neck.
“Okay, I need to get the butter.”
He let me go. I got the butter and put it on the counter. I did all of this without looking at him.