“I know what you didn’t,” she snapped in a mother-talking-to-idiot-daughter voice, “you didn’t want me to get sick again. Jet, for goodness sake, I’m not made of glass.
You can’t handle me for the rest of my life like I’m going to shatter.”
“Easy for you to say,” I whispered and stared at her.
She didn’t see herself in the hospital bed after it had happened; her whole left side limp and slack, even her face, her voice slurred and her eyes unfocused. It was horrible.
I wasn’t going to say it but I didn’t have to.
Her hand went to my cheek.
“Thank you, dol face,” she said quietly and I pressed my cheek into her hand as tears fil ed my throat.
Then she said, “But from this point on, you’re off duty.” My eyes flew to hers but she was looking at Eddie.
“I’m moving in with Trixie,” she announced.
I gasped.
Eddie spoke.
“You’re stayin’ with my mother tonight. Tomorrow you’re movin’ in with a friend who can keep you safe. I don’t know what’s gonna go down next and I’m not takin’ any chances.
When it’s over, you can move in with Trixie,” Eddie said in a voice not to be trifled with.
“Okay,” Mom said immediately, deciding not to trifle.
“But…” I started, feeling the somewhat desperate need to trifle.
Eddie pul ed me up by my arm and talked over me.
“Trixie, you come back with us, pack a bag for Nancy, enough for a week.” He turned to me, “You pack a bag too.” I opened my mouth to speak but Eddie kept on issuing orders, looking at Trixie.
“You can bring Nancy’s bag back, but I don’t want you two to go anywhere unless you arrange to have someone with you. Do you understand what I’m sayin’?” Trixie nodded, eyes wide as saucers.
“Indy, stop by to see Tex. Tel him he’s gonna have company.”
Indy nodded too.
Eddie started to drag me toward the door.
“Let’s go,” he said.
I looked at Blanca.
“I’m so sorry,” I said to her, on the trot because Eddie was stil dragging me.
“I’l take care of tu mama,” she promised.
*
We took off in our mini-convoy and went back to my apartment; Ada riding with Trixie. Before going into her apartment, Ada gave me tight hug. “You’re a good girl,” she said, her eyes glistening. She nodded to Eddie, probably too scared of him at that juncture to give him a hug, and went through her door.
I told myself not to cry and luckily, my self listened.
Trixie packed for Mom and gave me another tight hug.
She looked at Eddie then looked at me. “It’l al be okay,” she said.
she said.
I wished I could believe her.
Trixie took off, I packed and Eddie and I went to his place.
We didn’t talk. Eddie was in a mood.
Truth be told, I was in a mood too but I was keeping my mood to myself.
And my mood revolved around my fucking father.
Where was he?
It didn’t matter, I was going to find him and tel him exactly what I thought.
Something else. I was never again going to be as scared as I was that night.
Never.
I didn’t know how I was going to get control of my life but I was going to do it, one way or another.
No one made my Mom say the f-word.
Eddie carried my bag into his house and dropped it on the floor in the bedroom. Then he went around the house, closing al the blinds and making sure al the doors were secure. I stood in the middle of the living room, turning in slow circles, watching him move.
His face was hard and I could tel he was barely hanging onto his control.
Once he was done closing us away from prying eyes and locking us in tight, he grabbed my hand and dragged me to the bedroom. There, he dropped my hand and turned away, pul ing off his sweater.
“Eddie,” I said.
He glanced at me as he sat on the side of the bed, tugging off his boots.
“I have something to tel you and you have to promise not to get mad.”
Or, more like, more mad.
His eyes flickered and something fluttered in my bel y.
He dropped his second boot, stood and moved in close.
“What?” His voice was as tight as his face.
I took a breath.
“I saw Vince last night, at Smithie’s, right before I saw the guy with the gun. He made his threat then. I didn’t tel you ‘cause, wel , the guy with the gun kinda took precedence.”
Okay, so I was being semi-honest. It wasn’t the time to tel Eddie that I never intended to tel Eddie. It was the time to make sure Eddie had every piece of information Eddie needed to do… whatever Eddie had to do.
“He said if he fucked with me, Marcus would give him a bonus because of you. He said you and Marcus hate each other. He said Marcus would even go to war with Lee to get at you. Whatever that means.”
Eddie’s jaw worked.
Then he asked, “He say anything else?”
I shook my head but looked away and said, “Just stuff about what he was gonna do to me.”
“Yeah,” Eddie said and my eyes moved back to him, “he told me that too.”
It was clear that none of this did anything for Eddie’s mood.