It was my turn to stare at him.
“Are you on the pil ?” he asked.
I shook my head again.
His hand came away, his eyes went to it then he moved to the bottom of the bed and dropped over the edge silently. I stared at him while he did this, stunned immobile then his hands wrapped around my ankles and he dragged me down the bed, caught me when I came over the side and put me on my feet.
“What are you doing?” I asked, unable to keep up.
He grabbed my hand and pul ed me into the bathroom.
“Am I bleeding?”
“No.”
“Then, why –?”
He stopped in the bathroom and nabbed a rol ed washcloth (mint green, Egyptian cotton, my towels were lush) out of a basket on the back of the toilet. He threw it into the sink and turned on the tap.
“Vance, for God’s sake, what are you doing?” I snapped, my patience spent.
He came at me, face clouded.
I took one look at his face and retreated. Without far to go in the smal room, my back hit the bathroom wal and his body came up against mine.
“You were a virgin,” he said.
I opened and shut my mouth three times not knowing what to say.
“Don’t deny it.”
“How did you know?” I whispered.
“No one’s that fuckin’ tight. Jesus, Jules, why didn’t you say anything?”
“Turn off the faucet,” I said in an effort to stal . I did not want to have this particular conversation.
“Answer me,” he demanded. Vance was apparently intent on having this particular conversation.
I gave in to get it over with. “I tried, last night but things got…” I started then stopped, “and this morning things were advanced –”
“I didn’t use protection,” he interrupted me.
I blinked at him then my eyes got wide.
“Fuck. ” The word was a gentle explosion under his breath and then he got further into my space, his face close to mine. “I didn’t expect it to go that far.” This was not good.
“What did you expect to happen?” I asked.
“I expected to make you come with my hand and have time to get protection before I fucked you. But Christ, your face when you came…”
He stopped speaking and I stopped breathing.
Then he went on. “I also expected you to be the kind of woman with enough experience and brains to keep herself protected.”
My mouth dropped open then I snapped it shut then I said, “You make it sound like my fault.”
“You didn’t tel me you were a virgin. Things would have gone differently if you had.”
I didn’t know what that meant and I didn’t get the chance to ask.
He kept talking. “How in the fuck does someone who looks like you remain a virgin until you’re twenty-six fuckin’
years old?”
Okay, so, I was getting the impression that my virginal status was a turn off. Instead of this making me angry, it hurt me someplace private, someplace there was no way in hel I’d ever let show.
I pretended his words didn’t affect me and looked for an excuse.
“I’ve been kinda busy,” I told him.
“That’s not it.”
“I’m a lesbian?” I tried.
He stared at me like he thought it might be a good idea to cal a certain kind of doctor.
Then he twisted his torso around, turned off the faucet, came back and put his hands on the wal on either side of me.
“No one has ever touched you?” he asked, his voice stil sounding angry, intense and I didn’t know how to react.
I mean, this wasn’t exactly the end of the world, was it?
Was I that bad?
“No one’s ever touched me,” I answered softly.
“No one?”
I shook my head.
“Put their mouth on you?” he went on.
“Vance!” I exclaimed.
“Answer me, god dammit!” he clipped, his eyes flashing, the intensity escalating and my heart began to race.
“No!” I yel ed, confused and beginning to get freaked right the hel out.
When I said no he moved quickly, yanking my body to him and his arms went around me tight, his mouth came down on mine in a hot and heavy, ful -on-tongue-action kiss.
It took my breath away.
He pul ed away but only to yank my nightgown over my head and throw it aside. I noticed his nakedness then, forgetting my own, and stared in amazement at his body for the second he gave me before it was against mine, pressing me to the wal , hands everywhere, mouth on mine.
My bel y was fluttering again, wildly, and I went with it, exploring his skin with my hands.
Okay, so, maybe I was wrong about my virginal status being a turn off.
It was out of control, even though we’d just finished, we started again and it was not like before. I thought that had been intense but this was. It was violent, unrestrained, we were al over each other and it was fucking amazing.
Within minutes I was alternately panting, kissing him, tasting his neck, his col arbone, his shoulders and my hands were running over his ass when he bent, lifted my leg, swung it around his hip and slammed into me.