Chapter Five
"Tomorrow's Elvis night down at the club, do you want to come?" I looked at her casually, starting to feel annoyed that she didn't seem to want to hang out me. I hadn’t seen her all week since the night she’d gone on her date and I was beginning to feel frustrated and rejected. The only reason I was seeing her now was because I’d showed up at her apartment.
"Nah." She shook her light brown hair and didn't look up from her desk and books.
"What do you mean ‘nah’? You love Elvis and you love Elvis night!" I frowned. The only reason I had gotten two tickets was because I thought she wanted to go. We always went together. Since we were ten years old.
"I've got other plans." She looked up at me then and shrugged.
"What other plans?" I stared at her, not believing my ears. Clementine never had plans. I could always count on her to be there for me when I needed her. And if she said she had plans with Elliott, I was going to be mad.
“I have a date.” She smiled then and her eyes twinkled. “That’s why I need to study hard now. I can’t afford to get anything but an A on my finals next week.”
“So bring your date to the club.” I muttered, not even believing I was actually telling her to bring someone else to our night.
“You sure you wouldn’t mind?” She nibbled her lower lip and I smiled inwardly. So she did know that it wasn’t really cool to ditch me and then bring someone else to Elvis night.
“I mean, Elvis night has always been a night we celebrate together.” I shrugged. “And I always take you. I’ve never taken a date, but if you want to bring some guy you just meant online, feel free.”
“Rhett.” She frowned at me. “Does it really mean that much to you that we go together?”
“It’s kinda like a tradition.” I shrugged. “But fine, bring whoever and I’ll just find someone else to go with.”
“Fine, I’ll go.” She rolled her eyes. “Heaven forbid, you take one of your many girls with you.”
“I don’t want to go with anyone else; unlike you.” I paused and gave her a look. “I mean, we’ve been going as friends for years.”
“I know, I know.” She groaned. “Fine. We’ll go together. I’ll tell Elliott I can’t make it.”
“Elliott?” I made a face. “You’re still seeing bad kisser?”
“He’s not a bad kisser.” She made a face. “Anyway, it might have been nerves.”
“Uh huh.” I rolled my eyes.
“This is the start of something beautiful.” Her eyes lit up as she spoke excitedly. “Aren’t you excited for me, Rhett?”
“Of course.” I lied as I stared into her wide brown eyes. “I mean, if you’re sure this is what you want to do. Who am I to be a Debbie Downer?” I shrugged and looked away. How could I tell her that the start of her something beautiful was the start of my nightmare? I wasn’t sure what was going on and why things seemed to be changing so quickly, but I did know that all I wanted was for everything to stay the same.
“This is what I want.” She nodded. “I think I’m ready for my first proper boyfriend.”
“Whatever.” I pulled out my phone. “Anyway, I just popped over to make sure we’re still on for tonight. I’ve gotta go. I got a date tonight.”
“Oh okay.” She nodded and looked disappointed. “Maybe we can watch a movie later.”
“You mean you won’t be with Elliott?”
“He might have to study.” She shrugged and I rolled my eyes. “But, all three of us can watch one if he doesn’t.”
“I’ll see what happens tonight. I might be getting laid.” I shrugged my shoulders and turned away, feeling angry. All three of us, my ass. “I’ll text you and see what’s going on.”
“Okay, sounds good.” She smiled. “See you later, Rhett.”
“Yeah, see ya.” I walked out of the room and sent a mass text to about fifteen different girls. “What you doing tonight? Wanna get a drink?” There was no way that I was going to spend another night alone thinking about any bullshit.
***
“So I told Monica that there was no way that I was going to go on a date with Aiden.” Veronica spoke rapidly as she told me another story about her best friend and all the guys that supposedly wanted to date both of them.
“His loss, my gain.” I leaned in towards her and pretended to be interested, before taking another long chug of beer.
“I was so glad when I got your text message this morning.” She grinned. “I was wondering if you were ever going to call.”
“I texted.” I corrected her. “I didn’t call.”
“Well, I was glad when I got your text.” She grinned.
“Why?” I studied her face for a second. “Why were you glad?”
“Because you’re hot.” She didn’t hesitate in her response.
“What are you going is going to happen tonight?”
“I don’t know?” She shook her head as her face went red. “I just wanted to see you.”
“You wanted to go out for a drink?”
“Yeah, sure.” She played with her glass.
“Anything else?”
“No.” She looked down and I went in for the kill.
“Are you hoping to ride me tonight?”
“What?” She looked shocked, but her eyes lit up at my words.
“I guess you’re not saving yourself for marriage.” I commented and took another chug. “No worries that you’re not. Only fools save themselves for marriage.”
“Uhm. Okay.” She paused and looked at me in confusion. I knew she was trying to figure out whether I had just called her a fool.
“Don’t worry. I’m down for some fun tonight. You’re a beautiful girl.” I said smoothly and watched her start smiling again. I could have patted myself on the back. It was so easy with women. Give them a few compliments and smiles and they were like putty in my hand. Everyone asides from Clementine. It was like she was immune to my charm. It had never bothered me before, but now it was f*cking annoying me. Why wasn’t she more into me and hanging out? Why had she never been into me? I frowned as I thought back to high school and the moment when I’d turned into the boy all the girls wanted. Clementine had never started acting all girly on me. I’d never seen her writing my name. Or drawing hearts or even giving me looks of love. I didn’t get it. Was she immune to my blue eyes? I paused as I remembered one night in eleventh grade when I’d thought something was going to happen.
“Did you hear me? Veronica interrupted my thoughts and I frowned.
“Sorry what?”
“I said we can go back to my place after this, if you want. My roommate’s staying over at her boyfriends.”
“Oh, yeah. Sure.” I shrugged and my mind went back to eleventh grade. We’d been at Nanna’s house and Jake was watching wrestling on TV. I’d grabbed a cookie from her hand and stuffed it in my mouth and eaten it quickly. She had jumped on my back and we’d rolled around on the ground play fighting. Everything was all fun and games until she’d ended up sitting on top of me, her hair falling in my face as we’d laughed. Then she paused and for one second, it was just me on my back and her on top of me and we weren’t best friends playing around. There’d been a look in both of our eyes and I’d seen her face going red as we just stared at each other. I’m not sure what would have happened if Jake hadn’t jumped down and joined in the fun.
“I said I’m ready.” Veronica touched my hand.
“Ready for what?” I frowned and looked at her.
“To go back to my place.” She looked taken aback. “I was just saying that I got a new nightie from Victoria’s Secret.” She smiled sexily. “For a special occasion like this.”
“I see.” I gave her a small smile, but I knew there was no way I wanted to go back to her place.
“And I got some toys as well.” She leaned forward and licked her lips suggestively. “Some very naughty toys.”
“Oh?” I feigned interest and she grabbed my hand and stroked my palm. I grabbed her fingers and was about to push her away when I got a text message. I grabbed my phone and read the message. It was from Clementine and read, “Elliott just got here, want to come over and watch a movie? We were thinking about Love Actually. We can wait on you if you want.” I read the text message and I could feel my lips curling in disgust. Was she f*cking high? Did she really think I wanted to come and watch some sappy movie with her and her loser friend? I didn’t consider him her boyfriend at all. I put my phone back in my pocket without texting her back. Love Actually, I thought to myself again. What a fool Elliott was for agreeing to watch that piece of shit.
“You ready?” I jumped up and grabbed Veronica’s arm. “Let’s go.”
“Oh okay, sure.” She almost purred as we walked to my car.
“So what are these toys you got?” I asked her as we got into the car.
“Well, I got handcuffs.” She grinned. “And I also got a rabbit. I think you can help me with it if you want.”
“Sounds good.” I pulled out of the parking lot quickly. Boring.
“I just want you to know this isn’t something I normally do.” She said softly. “Normally, I wait until I’m in an official relationship…” She paused and I could feel her eyes on me.
I wanted to laugh at the absurdity of the situation. She wasn’t seriously trying to hint that we should be in a relationship? Didn’t she realize I couldn’t give two shits about her? I was going to f*ck her just to f*ck her, not because I actually wanted to be with her.
“I was waiting for marriage.” She started again and I froze.
“You’re not a virgin are you?” I looked at her quickly. There was no way this girl was a virgin, was there?
“Well, not anymore.” She giggled. “But I had hoped to wait for marriage.”
“My best friend is a virgin.” I muttered. “Trust me, I don’t think she’s having as much fun tonight as we’re going to have.”
“Unless she meets the right guy.” Veronica laughed. “It’s funny how quickly the right guy can talk any girl out of their panties.”
“What?” My voice was hoarse and I slowed down a bit.
“I mean, I don’t know her, but there are plenty of guys who can touch and talk real smooth and before you know what hit you, you’re in bed with your legs spread and his tongue in places, you never thought could feel so good.” She giggled again. “Just saying is all.”
“Yeah.” I felt my skin growing cold as I thought about her words. Maybe it wasn’t such a smart idea to let Clementine spend the night alone with Elliott at her apartment. She was too trusting and I didn’t know what sort of punk he was. He might try and make a move on her and she might not have a clue what to do or say. I thumped the steering wheel as I realized that I needed to go to Clementine’s apartment to make sure that Elliott didn’t try to take advantage of her.
“Take a right here.” Veronica exclaimed as I kept driving.
“Hey, we have to make a pitstop.” I didn’t look at her.
“Oh?” She sounded surprised. “Where are we going?”
“I need to make sure a friend of mine is okay, I won’t be long.” I muttered and frowned as we hit a red light. Of course, I was going to hit every red light now that I was on the way to Clementine’s. I was angry that Clementine had put me in this position. What smart girl had a guy she just met over to her apartment? What was she thinking? Now I had to interrupt my date to go and make sure she was okay. She really owed me, big time.
“What?” Veronica sounded put out. “How long is that going to take?”
I ignored her and concentrated on the road. There was an uncomfortable silence in the car as we drove to Clemmie’s apartment. “Look, I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” I gave Veronica a big smile as I parked and got out of the car.
“Shall I come in as well?” She looked confused and annoyed.
“No.” I shook my head and then paused. I was going to look like a loser showing up by myself, while Clementine sat there with her new man. “Actually, yeah, come on in.”
“Okay.” She got out of the car slowly and closed the door. “We’re not going to be here long, are we?”
“No.” I locked the doors and walked to Clementine’s front door purposefully, leaving Veronica to follow behind me.
Bang, Bang. I knocked on the front door loudly. Bang, Bang. I knocked again impatiently.
“I’m coming,” I heard Clementine’s voice as she walked to the door and I could feel myself growing angry. How could she sound so nonchalant while putting herself in danger for a possible rape?
Bang, Bang. I knocked on the door again angrily. I heard Veronica approach behind me. I turned to look at her and I could see that she was visibly upset at having to walk across the parking lot in her heels without my assistance. I looked at her for a second and knew that I was going to have to make it up to her, but right now I needed to make sure that Clementine knew I wasn’t impressed with her online dating safety measures.
“I said I’m coming.” Clementine opened the door with a perplexed expression on her face that changed to surprise when she saw me. “Oh hey, Rhett, what’s going on?” She looked at me curiously and then looked behind me at Veronica. “And hi,” She smiled weakly. “I’m Clementine, nice to meet you.”
“Okay.” Veronica nodded and spoke in a pissed tone.
“Your name is okay?” Clementine asked softly and I looked her in the eyes. She raised an eyebrow at me as if to say, another bimbo and I frowned at her.
“My name is Veronica.” Veronica spoke stiffly. “Who exactly are you? And why are we here, Rhett?” She touched my shoulder.
“Clementine, can we come in?” I stepped into her apartment without waiting for an answer. “Where’s Elliott?”
“He’s watching the movie.” She frowned at me. “We just paused it.”
“Tell me you’re not watching it in the bedroom.” I strode down the corridor and into the living room, feeling furious. “Oh, hi.” I stopped as I saw Elliott on the couch eating popcorn. He looked up and gave me a small smile.
“Hi,” His expression was friendly, but surprised. I looked him over and wanted to laugh. Elliott looked like a nerd. He couldn’t have been taller than 5”10 and he looked like he had a pretty small frame. I knew that he didn’t compare to my 6”2 stature and 200lbs of solid muscle. He had blond hair and doeful looking brown eyes. He was cute, I’d give him that, but he certainly wasn’t a hunk. Not saying that I’m a hunk or anything, but I knew that if we both walked into a bar, there would be way more girls over me.
“I’m Rhett.” I walked over to him and reached my hand out. “I’m Clementine’s best friend and Knight in shining armor.”
“Elliott.” He jumped up and shook my hand firmly. “It’s nice to meet a friend of Clementine’s.”
“Best friend.” I gave him a deceptively innocent smile.
“Does that really matter now we’re in our twenties?” His eyes narrowed as he continued smiling back at me.
“Does what matter?” Clementine walked into the room with Veronica following behind, looking out of place.
“The distinction of best when talking about friends.” Elliott walked over to her and put his arm around her shoulder. “I just thought that was a pretty grade school thing, to classify friends as best.” He shrugged and smiled at me. “I’ve never been one to have to stress how close I was to someone.”
“Oh,” Clementine laughed. “I guess Rhett and I still refer to each other as best friends.” She gave me a winning smile, but I didn’t smile back. What did she see in this douche?
“This is your best friend?” Veronica looked at me and then at Clementine, her eyes narrowed. I looked at Clementine through her eyes and I understood why she looked pissed. Clementine looked hot in her black skinny jeans and midriff top. Since when did she own a midriff top? Her long hair was flowing around her shoulders and her brown eyes were sparkling. I looked closer and I could see that she had eye shadow covering her eyes. When did she start wearing eye shadow?
“You look like a raccoon.” I muttered at Clementine and she frowned at me.
“What?”
“We need to talk.” I walked over to her and grabbed her hand and pulled her to her bedroom with me. “We’ll be right back.” I muttered to Veronica and Elliott as we left the room.
“What’s going on Rhett?” Clementine exclaimed as we walked into her bedroom.
“Do you know how irresponsible you’re being?” I growled at her and leaned against the door so no one could get in.
“Huh?” She looked confused.
“You just met this guy online. He could be a psycho or a stalker.” I shouted, furiously. “And after one date you already have him in your apartment, alone. How stupid are you?” I glared at her. “I had to leave my date to come and check up on you to make sure you’re okay.”
“Are you crazy?” She glared at me. “Elliott is not a psycho and you didn’t need to come and check up on me.” She shook her head. “What the f*ck is your problem? You chose to bring that bimbo here.”
“She’s not a bimbo.” I glared at her.
“Sure, okay is not a bimbo.” She glared back at me.
“What?” I frowned, confused by her words. Then I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. “Her name isn’t okay. Her name is Veronica.”
“Same difference.” She grinned at me, reluctantly.
“She’s hot.” I shrugged. “Her name means nothing to me.”
“That’s so wrong.” She sighed. “Poor girl.”
“You don’t care.”
“I care about you.” She bit her lower lip. “I want more for you than nameless encounters.”
“This is about you, don’t change the subject.”
“Don’t go all Papa Bear on me Rhett.” She sighed. “I can take care of myself.”
“What if he makes a move on you?” I frowned. “What are you going to do?”
“I can take care of myself and I can make my own decisions.”
“You’ve never been in this situation before.” I stiffened. “You don’t know what guys are like.”
“I know you.” She smiled gently. “I know what you do with girls, I’m not some sheltered little princess.” She sighed. “And I want to start dating. I want to get out there. I want a boyfriend. I want a life.”
“I thought you were concentrating on your studies.” I could feel my heart beating fast.
“My studies aren’t going anywhere.” She looked at the ground. “I’ve wasted so much time already. I feel like I’ve wasted so many years.”
“You’re 21, Clementine.” I rolled my eyes.
“Yeah, but most girls my age have had a boyfriend before.” She sighed. “Most girls went to Prom.”
“You went to Prom.” I protested.
“I went with Jake.” She shook her head. “Going to prom with your little brother is no fun.”
“You went with me too.”
“Rhett, you had a date.” She rolled her eyes. “You went with a date and I went with Jake. Yeah, we shared the same limo ride, but it wasn’t fun.”
“I thought you had a good time.” My heart thudded. “I tried to include you, you know that.”
“I know.” She stepped forward and grabbed my hands. “You’ve always been here for me, Rhett. You’re the best friend a girl could ask for, but I need more than that. I want a boyfriend. I want romance. I want a man to sweep me off of my feet. I want to be the only date of some guy. I want him to wake up and think of me. I want him to fall asleep dreaming of me. I want him to text me in the middle of the day just to say hello. I want him to love me with all his heart. I want his heart to be so full of love for me, that he can’t believe he’s so lucky.” She gave me a short smile. “I know I sound sappy, but I’m ready for my true love.”
“Clementine,” I shook my head at her. “That shit doesn’t exist. That’s Hallmark cards and those crappy romance movies and books you watch and read. I don’t know one guy that tells me his heart is so full of love for anyone.” I reached over and stroked her hair. “I’m not trying to be a jerk, but I don’t want you to spend your life searching for something that doesn’t exist.”
“I think it does exist.” She bit her lower lip.
“I’m telling you it doesn’t.”
“Well, you live your life that way.” She stepped back from me. “But I’m going to live my life this way.”
“So you want to live in a day dream?”
“I want to live with hopes and dreams, yes.” She nodded. “And I’m going to search for my true love, but I can’t do that, if I don’t date or put myself out there.”
“So you think that Elliott is your Prince Charming? Even though he’s a crappy kisser?”
“Rhett,” Her eyes widened and she pushed her hand against my mouth. “Shhh.”
“What? I’m just saying?” I smiled at her innocently.
“I don’t know what’s going to happen with Elliott, but I like him and I’d like to see where it goes.” She spoke softly. “Thank you for being concerned, Rhett, but I think I can handle this by myself. I don’t need you to play bodyguard.”
“Uh huh.” I frowned and looked at her bed. “Fine.”
“Veronica seems nice enough.” She looked at me curiously. “Do you like her a lot?”
“She’s fine.” I snapped and stepped forward. “I guess we can go back in the living room.”
“Rhett.” She touched my arm. “Are you okay?”
“I’m fine.” I pulled away from her and walked back into the living room. “You ready?” I walked over to Veronica and ignored Elliott. She looked up at me with an annoyed expression.
“I’ve been ready.” She replied with a sour look on her face.
“Let’s go.” I looked back at Clementine and raised an eyebrow at her. “Gimme a call, if you need me.” I stared at her for a few seconds and I could see from her expression that she was upset. Good, I thought. Let her think about what she’s doing. I walked out of the living room and through the front door without looking back. I could hear Veronica running behind me, but I didn’t slow my pace down.
“Are we going to my place now?” Veronica asked softly as she got into the car.
“I’m taking you back to your place, but I’m afraid I can’t stay the night.” I muttered as I pulled out of the parking lot.
“What?” Her voice was high. “What do you mean?”
“I mean you’ll have to use that rabbit on yourself.” I shrugged. “Or I have a friend you can call, if you really need to have some help. Tomas would be down I’m sure.”
“You’re a jerk.” She exclaimed pissed and I laughed.
“Trust me, you’re not the first girl to say that and I’m sure you won’t be the last.”
I pulled up to her apartment and dropped her off, not even bothering to make sure she made it to the door before pulling away. I was so pissed that I could barely think straight. I didn’t know where to go or what to do. I didn’t want to go home. I couldn’t go to Clementine’s. I didn’t want to see any of my guy friends. I didn’t wanna hook-up with any of the girls I had in my phone. I just wanted to be by myself in nature somewhere. I just needed to switch my brain off. I drove and drove for about an hour, before I decided to go to an old park that I used to go to as a kid. It was one of the only positive memories I had of my childhood and my mother.
I parked my car and got out and walked to a bench that was a couple of yards away from the children’s playground. The night air was warm, but there was a cool breeze. I closed my eyes for a second and sat back. The earth seemed to be moving beneath me and I was finding it hard to breathe. I took a couple of deep breaths and then opened my eyes and looked at the sky. The stars were shining brightly and I looked around at the playground as if seeing it for the first time. I could picture my mothers’ face as she watched me from the bench, her face looking like an angel as she stared at me with pride and love. Her hair had been long and blonde and her big blue eyes were always warm. Or they’d always been warm, until everything changed. I’d loved coming to the park. We’d always pack a picnic lunch and my mom would swing me around and around until both of us felt slightly dizzy.
I gripped the seat beneath me as I remembered my mothers’ laughing face and her loving eyes. Her loving eyes had lied to me though. She didn’t love me. She’d never loved me. If she had, she wouldn’t have left. She wouldn’t have loved the alcohol more than me. It had been ten years since I’d seen my mother. Ten long years of wondering why she’d stopped loving me. Ten years of wondering what I could have done differently. I could feel my eyes growing heavy and my heart aching as I sat there.
I hated that she could still do this to me. I hated that there was never a day that went by that I didn’t feel that slight ache inside. The ache I couldn’t reach. I hated that sometimes late at night, I woke up and all I could think about was her. I didn’t understand it. I didn’t want to feel this way. I wasn’t that guy. I didn’t get emotional. I didn’t care. I didn’t let anyone get too close or affect me. The only person I loved was Clementine. And she was my best friend. I knew that she was the only one I could count on to always be there for me. I couldn’t risk that friendship. Not for anything. I frowned as I realized my thoughts had changed from my mother to Clementine. I sighed as I sat there, feeling so tired and confused. I sat there in the silence, enjoying being by myself. This was what my life was now. It was just me. Clementine would find someone and leave me. It was inevitable.
Beep Beep. My phone vibrated as I received a text message and I pulled the phone out of my pocket.
“Hey.” It was Clementine. I was about to put my phone back in my pocket, but decided to text her back.
“Hey.” I didn’t have anything else left to say.
“Movie was good.”
“That’s nice.”
“Elliott left.”
“Okay.”
“Don’t be mad.”
I didn’t respond.
“Veronica and you having a good time?”
“I dropped her home.”
“Oh.”
I didn’t respond again.
“I thought about it and you were right.” She texted me again after two minutes.
“About what?” I texted back.
“It wasn’t smart to invite Elliott back to my apartment after one meeting.”
“Told ya.” I smiled to myself.
“He’s not a psycho though.”
“We’ll see.”
“What you doing?”
“Relaxing.”
“At home?”
“No.”
“Oh.”
“I came to relax.”
“Oh. I see.”
I didn’t respond again. Instead, I stood up and walked over to the playground and looked around.
“Can I come?” She texted back again.
“If you want.” I responded slowly. There was no response from Clementine after that and I walked back to the bench and sat down again. About ten minutes later, I saw a car pulling into the parking lot. I watched as Clementine got out of the car and walked towards me with something in her arms.
“Hi.” She smiled at me softly.
“Hi.” I nodded and tried not to stare at her beautiful face.
“I brought this for you.” She handed me a sweater. “I knew it was pretty cool out and I knew you just had on your t-shirt.”
“Thanks.” I took it from her gratefully and pulled it on. “How’d you know where I was?”
“How could I not know?” She smiled and sat down next to me.
“Yeah.” I sighed and leaned back, my shoulders rubbing hers.
“That’s what best friends are for.” She rested her head down on my shoulder and we both sat there in silence just watching the stars. These were the times that I loved. These were the times I craved. Sitting in silence with someone. With her. It reminded me that while I felt alone, I always had her. Even in my darkest hours. Even when I didn’t want to talk. Even when I felt like the world was caving in on me. Clementine was always there. She was the light at the end of the tunnel. I closed my eyes and thought about my mom. There was a point in my life that I had thought she’d always be there as well. There was a point when I thought that I was her world. But I’d been wrong. I felt my body tensing as Clementine rested next to me. What if Clementine left me as well? What if her forever was temporary as well? Would I ever be able to get over losing my best friend?