After one last nipple check was done, an assistant grabbed Kellan’s hand and placed it on Sienna’s ass. Then they took his other one and placed it on the low ridge of her back—one of Kellan’s favorite spots. Sienna smiled and whispered something to him. Kellan looked down at her face and gave her a tight smile in return. Everything about him seemed tense, like he couldn’t relax . . . or he was afraid to.
Diedrich yelled action again, and Sienna leaned down to kiss him again. My heart instantly started beating harder, and I had to practice deep cleansing breaths. Kellan mildly kissed her back, his rigid hands glued into position on her body. It went on for a seemingly endless amount of time—Sienna trying her damnedest to turn him on, Kellan barely responding. He was so different than the passionate man I knew him to be.
Just when I thought Diedrich was going to yell cut again and Nick was going to evict me from the premises, Kellan sucked in a deep breath, closed his eyes, and started coming to life. It began with his hands, traveling over her skin, playing with the indent of her low spine. Then he started kissing her with genuine fervor. Before I knew it, there were flashes of their tongues meeting on the mega-sized screen right in front of my face. Lip smacking had been clear in the air for a while, but now that Sienna was getting a response from him, her light moans punctuated the silence. I felt warmth trickle down my palms as my fingernails finally cut through the skin.
Oh. My. God. What did I agree to let him do?
Now that his “actors” were getting into their roles, Diedrich started barking out commands—feel this, touch that, lift your head, kiss her there, roll her over. By the time Kellan had her on her back, he was completely and totally immersed in what he was doing. Tears stung my eyes, but I made myself continue to watch.
There was a camera at the foot of the bed as well as one beside the bed. The one at the foot was getting an impressive view of Kellan’s defined back. The thin bed sheet was strategically placed low on Kellan’s hips, just enough to cover his underwear, giving the viewer the illusion that he was naked. The sheet was so thin that it outlined his body, and every thrust he gave Sienna was completely obvious, and disturbingly graphic.
The camera beside the bed was the one getting a close-up of their faces. That one almost disturbed me more, because the expression on Kellan’s face was one I’d seen before . . . when he was with me. Eyes closed, he was breathing hard in between frantic kisses. Sienna was squirming and groaning beneath him; it wouldn’t surprise me in the least if she wasn’t acting, if he actually was pleasing her. Was she pleasing him? Was he aroused? I had no idea, and it drove me crazy not to know. I think knowing would have driven me crazy too, though.
Kellan’s lips played over hers. His tongue ducked into her mouth, then slid over to trace the outline of her ear. Upon request of the director, Kellan’s fingers trailed up her side, stopping right over the breast closest to the camera, cupping it. I thought I’d seen enough to give me nightmares for a month, but then Kellan ran his nose up her throat, his tongue stretching out to lightly taste her skin.
An irrational jealousy swept through me. That was my favorite move! And he was using it on this . . . bitch! True, we hadn’t set any boundaries on what he could and couldn’t do today, but, out of respect for me, couldn’t he stay away from moves that were used in our bedroom?
Words that my mother had spoken to me last Christmas leapt to life in my brain. It takes a special person to be able to handle all of the attention he’ll receive. Are you sure you’re that woman? I’m sure my mom hadn’t anticipated this level of attention, but her point was suddenly a valid one. Could I handle this?
I started to turn away from him, disgusted, but then I remembered the look on his face when this all started. And I remembered the pressure he was under to do this—by his band, by the label, even by me. And then I remembered what I’d told him when I first talked him into this, when he said he couldn’t do it. Just pretend she’s me. My eyes snapped back to him on the monitor. Was that what he was doing? Pretending she was me?
The director yelled cut, and Kellan froze and immediately rolled off of her. He kept his eyes closed as he laid his head back on the pillows. I could see his chest heaving, and as he swallowed, I swear I saw his jaw tremble. My concern for him instantly shot past my brief moment of jealousy. God, was he okay with this?
Sienna sure was. She was fanning herself like Kellan was the greatest thing since sliced bread. How could she be so oblivious to his turmoil? Was I the only one that noticed how tightly he kept his eyes closed, like he was afraid to open them? I wanted to run over to him, to tell him that I wasn’t mad, but after some quick adjustments, Diedrich yelled action again, and the making out continued.