You know why you keep her around.
Yeah. I guess I do. We’re alike in many ways. Not all, but we get each other.
Squeezing Lexi’s waist, I lead her down the hall until we stand in front of my room. Slowly, as to not spook her, I reach forward and open the door. Not saying a word, she allows me to walk her in and I shut the door behind us.
Letting go of her, I walk over to my bed and sit on the edge. But Lexi just stands there, by the dresser, staring into nothingness.
“Lexi, come over here.”
Nothing. She stands where she is. The light in her eyes has dimmed so much that I wonder if I’ve broken her so soon in our game.
“Come here, Lexi. Sit with me. We’ll talk.”
Relief and disappointment both pass through me as her brows furrow. “I-I don’t understand,” she says softly.
I state, “You wouldn’t.”
Taking a step back, she bumps into the dresser. “He was hurting her. He was—” Her eyes lose focus. “And she was… He hit her and she… I don’t understand.”
I hate the way she sounds so young right now. It takes me back to my childhood. A place I’d rather keep buried deep. Standing, I take her in a moment. My angel. She looks beautiful tonight. As always. But right now, she looks like a fallen angel.
Devastated. Rocked. And Distressed.
It’s sick, but I like it.
Begging my cock not to react is impossible. It jerks in my pants and I take a few steps towards her. I won’t beg. I don’t beg. But I will meet her halfway. For tonight. Holding out my hand to her, I order gently, “Take my hand.”
Finally looking up at me, her blue eyes looking much too pale, the gloom there actually starts to bother me.
Nope. I don’t like it.
Extending my hand a little further, she stares at it a long time before she whispers, “You knew. You-you knew.”
I nod. “Yeah. We can discuss it when you’re not so far away from me.”
Leaning even further back into the dresser, she asks, “What if I don’t want to discuss it?”
I don’t like being questioned. Gritting my teeth, I quash down my sudden annoyance and manage a gentle but calm voice as I tell her firmly, “We need to discuss it.”
Her eyes bore into mine. So much sadness there.
Reaching out slowly and uncertainly, she places her small hand into mine, and with a small tug, I pull her into my body, wrapping my arms around her and walking backwards towards the bed. Sitting, I bring her down to sit on my lap and play with the fingers on her left hand as I start. “You weren’t meant to see that.”
Nodding, she says dejectedly, “No. I suppose I wasn’t.” A short pause. “You knew she likes that stuff?”
I don’t reply. That being my reply.
Lexi stiffens. She whispers, “Have you…? I mean, how did you know?”
Once again, I let my silence speak for me.
She swallows hard. “I see.”
Suddenly, my chest pounds. It’s such an unfamiliar feeling that it rocks me. I realize the feeling is worry.
I’m losing her.
Quietly, I explain, “Ling is damaged. What she’s been through, I honestly don’t know how she made it out alive. I’m not saying her tastes are normal or natural, but I am saying to not judge her too harshly. She’s not all bad.”
Lexi tenses further. “How could you do that to her?”
Wrapping an arm around her waist as if to stop her from escaping, I remain honest. “Because she wanted it. It was consensual, even if it didn’t look like it. Ling is old enough to make her own decisions, and she isn’t dumb or impaired in any way.” Then, brutal honesty. “It was actually easy. It was hot. It turned me on. I enjoyed it, and I would do it again.”
Sad eyes meet mine. “You hit her?”
“Yes. More than once. Maybe even harder than he did.”
Nodding, her eyes turn frightened as she asks, “Will you hit me?”
Fighting to keep the anger under control, I ask, “You want me to hit you?”
And her answer is pure redemption. Her answer lets me know that I’ve far from lost her. “Not like that.”
Relief flows through me as I tug at a piece of her hair. “I’m good at reading people, Lexi. When we’re together, I know what you like and what you don’t. I know what you think you don’t like and are scared to try. I know how to push you further than you’re used to.” Allowing that to sink in a moment, I tell her, “I will spank you. I will be rough with you. I will push you to your limits. But I promise that if you give it a chance, you’ll enjoy taking it as much I like to deliver it.”
Her chest heaves with heavy breaths. “What if you read me wrong? What if it goes too far?”
Reaching up, my fingertips hold her chin firmly as I look into her eyes and ask seriously, “You like what we’ve done so far?”