chapter 21
Z
After the block party, the weeks flew by. My family loved Izzy, as did Flynn’s parents and really the whole neighborhood, my mom told me. Izzy and I were having the best time. We started taking mini trips on the days the club was closed.
I finally found out she had an IUD, so we could scrap the condoms. Thank God, because that was pissing me off when we didn’t have one lying around – although she made up for those times with her sweet mouth. God she’s amazing and not just for that.
We’ve got this great connection and I couldn’t put my finger on it, but it was definitely different than all my other girlfriends I’ve ever had. We talked all the time about her past, not with her ex, she didn’t seem to want to go there just yet. But that’s okay, I’ve got time and all the patience in the world for her. I was really starting to fall hard for Izzy. To say I wanted to tell her I loved her every day was an understatement, but I didn’t want to scare her away by saying it too soon. Not to mention I’ve never said it to a girl, so I really wanted it to be special when I finally did say it.
Yep, everything was great until one night at the club – F*cking Whore came in. I was in the office on a busy Saturday night and she walked right in through the door and closed it. I looked up from the computer thinking it was Izzy, since every once in a while she would sneak in and we’d have an amazing quickie or a great make out session. No, it wasn’t Izzy, it was the F*cking Whore. But f*ck she looked amazing. Just like when I first met her. She was just a knockout and she was dressed really nice.
I stood up and tried my best not to look her over, but couldn’t help it. I cleared my throat and tried to gruffly ask, “What are you doing here? Why’d you close the door?”
She smiled sexy and walked up to me putting her hand on my chest. “You ignore all my calls and texts, I thought I needed to come in and just talk to you.” She purred as she rubbed her hand on my chest. F*ck, she needed to get her hand off me, I kept thinking. I didn’t want Izzy to walk in and see her in here. Things were awesome between us and this F*cking Whore cheated on me. I didn’t forget that as she continued to rub her hand on my chest.
“I ignore your texts and calls because you cheated on me. Now you need to get out. It’s over between us and I really don’t want to see you again.” I tried to sound convincing, which was tough because her lips were so close to mine and f*ck if she didn’t smell fantastic.
“Come on, it was so good in the beginning between us, don’t you remember? Remember the nights in my hot tub?” She purred. F*ck, I sure did. But I couldn’t let her think I remembered those.
“I remember you being bent over my couch by some a*shole! You need to leave. Like now. We’re done and over with. There’s no chance we’re ever getting back together, regardless if I was with Izzy or not.”
She pouted. “Oh come on, for old time’s sake...” she reached up and pressed her lips to mine. I forgot how great she kissed and I may have let her lips linger a bit longer than I should have, but nothing compared to how sweet Izzy tastes.
I started to pull back and that’s when my door opened up and Izzy walked in saying, “Hey, I was thinking….” She froze and saw F*cking Whore with her lips on me. I’ll never forget that sad, disappointed look in her eyes.
I pushed F*cking Whore away and explained, “It’s not what you think.” Izzy looked away quickly and left the room hastily. “F*ck!” I could have punched F*cking Whore…especially if she just f*cked up everything with Izzy. I ran after Izzy with F*cking Whore behind me, laughing as she walked out of my office.
I looked over and Izzy was right back behind the bar and started to talk to a guy taking his order. She looked flustered, but not terribly upset. I walked over to her as she was prepping the drink. “Izzy, it’s not what you think.” I tried to explain.
She looked at me with vacant eyes but calmly said, “No, it’s fine. Really. I understand,” and turned back around to prep the drinks.
What the f*ck is she thinking in her head? “No, I don’t think you understand. She kissed me and I was pushing her away,” I insisted, lowering my voice.
She swallowed hard and nodded her head, “Okay, I got it,” smiling sweetly. She was ‘okay’ with that? I wasn’t getting it nor buying it. What girl wouldn’t be jealous as f*ck walking in on her boyfriend and his ex – kissing. She looked up at me and whispered, “You’ve got lipstick on your lips.” I wiped it off with the back of my hand and looked over the bar area and saw F*cking Whore and her friends were all in a circle laughing while looking over at Izzy and me. Maybe Izzy didn’t want F*cking Whore to have the satisfaction of seeing her upset? I wasn’t sure, but that had to be it.
I stood there watching Izzy make drinks, serve and take the money for their drinks. Then I grabbed her by her arm and brought her back to my office. I closed the door and locked it. I didn’t want to be interrupted because I wanted to make sure she understood. I couldn’t lose Izzy for something stupid like this. I was falling madly in love with her.
Izzy leaned against my desk and was looking off into space. I tilted her head up to mine to make her look me in the eyes. “Izzy, I promise you that wasn’t what it looked like.”
She looked at me and smiled, “I know. I believe you. You said she kissed you and you told me you pushed her away. It’s okay. Really.”
Why wasn’t she jealous? “So….we’re all good?” I asked timidly. I wasn’t sure what to think at this point. If it was the other way around I’d be punching walls.
“Yes, we’re all good. Promise.” She was looking me in the eye, smiling, but she still had that vacant look in her eyes. She looked at the door, “I better get back out there. We’ve been slammed all night.”
I looked around the room then back to her eyes, “But we’re good, right? You’re not mad or anything, right? You understand she kissed me and I was pushing her off me, right?” I felt like she wasn’t really listening to me.
“Yes, promise. It’s all good.” She reached up to kiss me as I bent down to meet her lips with mine and wanted to kiss her deeply, but her kiss just felt …empty. Like she was just kissing to appease me.
“You sure?” I asked her again. She nodded and smiled. She turned and walked out back to the bar. I just stood there trying to think if she really was alright. I didn’t understand it. Why wouldn’t she be jealous?
I walked back out and Clark came over saying we had a VIP so I went to attend to them. I glanced back at the bar and Izzy was serving drinks as if nothing happened. Mark was on the other end serving F*cking Whore and her friends drinks. I hoped he’d make sure Izzy stayed at the other end away from them.
I came walking back down to where Izzy was serving. She looked up and smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. They still had that same vacant look. F*ck. Of course it’s not okay. Why did she keep trying to tell me that?
Several chicks came up to me to talk with me and flirt. I was trying not to talk to them, but they were customers too and I didn’t want to be rude. No wonder none of my relationships ever worked out. I always had girls coming up to me. I looked around and tried to find some guys to hook them up with. I found a couple of suckers and brought the ladies over to them. I caught Izzy’s eyes watching me and she smiled. Well, good, at least I didn’t f*ck that up. Maybe I scored some points to get me back to where I was before F*cking Whore’s kiss. Maybe.
Finally, it was closing time. Mark came over after F*cking Whore and her friends left, telling me they said a ton of shit about Izzy so he made sure she didn’t go near them. I thanked him and then I walked over to Clark and asked him not to let F*cking Whore or her friends in ever again. He nodded saying, “No problem.”
Just then, my phone chimed with a text from F*cking Whore. I loved kissing you and I think you missed it too. Call me. Let’s have fun like old times. I shook my head and clicked off my phone. What the f*ck was wrong with her? I looked up at Izzy and watched as she cleaned up. She was trying to force jokes out with Sandy and Mark. Or was that my imagination that she was forcing it. Was she really happy and making jokes? I wouldn’t have been if I were in her shoes. Shit. Maybe she really does understand and is alright.
Everyone was done cleaning and we were heading out. I grabbed Izzy’s hand as I locked up. We started walking toward her townhouse. Normally, we would discuss which house we were going to, but I wasn’t even going to give her an option that I wasn’t going to be with her tonight. I didn’t need her thinking I was going to be with F*cking Whore or something.
We walked in the door and we both started to laugh. Did I mention that Flynn and Mel finally hooked up? It was a couple days after the block party. Now they were f*cking like rabbits and that’s all we ever heard when we stayed there. Clark said it made him so horny, he had to keep giving Tina booty calls.
Izzy walked over to the fridge and grabbed a beer. I sat at the kitchen island and watched her carefully, trying to gauge if she was upset. She chugged the whole thing down. I watched in awe realizing that I didn’t think she even took a breath. Normally, I would chalk her chugging that beer down just because she really likes beer, but tonight, I was pretty sure it was to calm her nerves. She finished and took a deep breath and put the bottle in the recycling bin. She looked at me a bit sadly. “I’m tired, I’m going to head up.”
“Yeah, me too, let’s go.” I stood up, trying not to appear nervous as I still had no idea what was going on in her head.
“You’re staying?” She looked surprised.
“Do you not want me to?” Not that I was going to give her that option.
“Yeah, that’s fine.” She nodded her head and went upstairs. I felt like I was waiting for her to burst at some point. I just wanted her to say something about the f*cking kiss. Scream at me. Something. But she didn’t. She grabbed her PJs and went to the bathroom, changed and came back. She pulled the covers back and got into bed. She didn’t say a word. I stood there just watching and waiting.
“Are you going to sleep here? Or just stand there watching me sleep?” she asked with a half-smile.
“Yeah, no, I’m...we’re going to sleep.” I pulled my shoes, shirt and jeans off and slid into bed next to her.
I pulled her close to my chest and kissed her hair. I was afraid to make a move because I wasn’t sure if she wanted that. She looked up and kissed me forcefully. God she has an amazing mouth. I pushed my tongue past her lips and she let me in. We kissed for a while and I wasn’t going to make love to her, but we were getting so heated up. Our kissing became deeper and I felt like I wanted to prove to her that I choose her and not what’s her name.
I rolled on top of her and she did that thing with her arms, where she puts them immediately over her head. God I loved that. It was like she gave me full control over her entire body. It was the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. No one I’ve ever been with did that. I was consumed with desire for her. I wanted to make sure she understood it was her I was with and not thinking about any other woman.
“You are the most incredible, sexiest woman,” I whispered in her ear. I moved myself so my hard cock was right at her warm wet opening just waiting for me. I entered her slowly, feeling her every movement. I bent down and kissed her passionately as she moaned into my mouth. My thrusts were slow and intense and our breaths were steady and fast. It was the most erotic lovemaking we’ve ever had. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore and knew I was going to have the most intense release. “Come with me baby, I’m going to come so f*cking hard.” She came immediately and she clenched me tight, pulsing while moaning so loudly. As I came down from my orgasm, she continued to shudder with the after effects of hers.
I kissed her over and over again. It was the type of lovemaking that made you want to cry, but since I’m a guy, I wouldn’t do that. Instead I whispered, “God, Izzy, you’re everything I’ve ever wanted and more.” I looked her in the eyes and she was tearing up. I was still inside of her, kissing her deeply again. I collapsed my body on top of her letting her feel every ounce of my weight. I buried my head in her neck and hair, kissing her ear. I pulled myself out of her, lay on my side and pulled her close into me. I closed my eyes and fell asleep.
I wasn’t sure how long I had been asleep but my phone chimed a text. I was pretty sure I knew whom it was from. I glanced over at Izzy and she was fast asleep. She looked like an angel. Her head was turned and her hair was fanned out underneath her. I wanted to kiss her sweet lips, but was afraid of waking her. I pressed my lips to her forehead instead. She stirred briefly and curled onto her side. “God, I think I’m in love with you.” I whispered, kissing her cheek and settled in next to her holding her tightly as I fell back asleep.
I woke the next morning to an empty bed. I sat up wondering where she went. I looked over and my phone was on the nightstand. F*ck. I hope she didn’t read the texts. I checked and there was a text from Izzy, Went for a run. Be right back. X. Well that doesn’t seem like she’s mad at me.
I checked the text from F*cking Whore...sure enough, that’s what woke me during the night. Seemed more like a drunk text saying, You were the best f*ck I’ve ever had. Too bad she didn’t think that before she f*cked some other douche. Not that I really care anymore. All I wanted and needed is Izzy. I remembered what I said to her before falling back asleep. “I think.” I don’t ‘think’ that anymore. I know it. I know I’m in love with Izzy. I am head over heels completely and totally in love with Izzy. I stood up smiling at my realization and pulled my jeans and shirt on and walked downstairs.
Mel and Flynn were already down there drinking their coffee. They were smiling at each other whispering about something, touching hands. I smiled. It was good to see my buddy so happy. I grabbed a mug. “Morning.” They smiled happily at me.
“Hey, Z!” Mel exclaimed.
Clark walked in through the front door just then. I looked up at him, “Tina?”
He laughed. “Nah, a brunette who really wanted to get in last night!” I laughed at his intended pun. “Hey, by the way, I’m really sorry about letting Sheila in last night. I didn’t think she’d be stupid enough to try anything. What happened?” Clark asked.
Mel and Flynn looked at me with huge eyes. I took a deep breath looking at the door to make sure Izzy wasn’t walking in. I lowered my voice, “F*cking Whore walked into my office while I was working on the books and closed the door. I got up to get her out of there and she kissed me. Izzy walked in right then.” I told them, shaking my head.
“Holy f*ck!” Clark exclaimed.
“Oh my God! What did Izzy say?” Mel asked, looking worried.
I swallowed hard. “That’s where I’m totally confused. I explained it to her and she said ‘it’s okay.’ Like it’s no big deal.” I looked at Mel, “that’s not normal, is it? I would have thought she’d been jealous or screamed at me or something!”
Mel looked as shocked as I was last night. She glanced over at the door again and asked, “Nothing? Like, she didn’t flip out?” I shook my head no. “Shit. I pulled her off a girl one time just for flirting with a guy she was dating in college. That is so not like her.” Mel said shaking her head, her eyes were huge and she looked very worried about her friend.
“That’s what I thought. I mean, not that I wanted all that jealousy or anything, but she just fluffed it off as nothing.”
I took a sip of coffee and heard the front door open. Izzy came back in looking like she ran a marathon. Her face was all red and she was sweating way more than she usually did when she came back from her runs. She went to the fridge and took out a water bottle and drank just about all of it. We were all watching her and she stopped and looked at us. “What?” she asked with huge eyes.
I laughed, “Nothing, umm, you just look like you ran to the state line and back.”
She chuckled. “Yeah well, I had a REALLY great run.” She kissed me and said, “I’m going to grab a much needed shower.” Smiling and gesturing to her sweaty body and she ran up the stairs.
We all just sat there looking after her. Mel took a deep breath and shook her head. “It’s got to be something with her ex. She never used to act like that. Old Izzy would have had your balls on a platter.” Uh, yeah, suddenly I was glad I wasn’t dating old Izzy.
Flynn piped up. “Hmm. That’s odd.” His brows were pulled together as if he were trying to remember something.
Mel asked, “What is?”
“Well, that night we were drunk...” We all started laughing because wasn’t that pretty much how most of our stories began? “No, hear me out. The night you first kissed Izzy that you don’t really remember, we were talking about jealousy and I remember her saying something about her ex making her jealous on purpose, but I never thought anything of it. Well, until now.”
Mel just stared at him. “Wow, he really did mind f*ck her, didn’t he?”
I just shook my head. What the hell is going on in my girl’s head? What did he do? “What, like you think he conditioned her not to be jealous or something?” I whispered, not sure if the echo thing works both ways up the stairs.
Mel said, “I wouldn’t doubt it. I mean a girl who used to go crazy on other chicks for flirting doesn’t walk in on her guy with his ex kissing him and not flip out.” She said shaking her head.
No, I guess she’s right. So what did her ex really do to her?