Five
After viewing the absolutely perfect house next door to Sam’s, Nicole immediately agreed to the rental. She and Henry Brown, a nice older man, had shaken hands, and with them moving out for good tomorrow, she could be in this coming weekend. In true small-town fashion, the couple wasn’t worried about doing a background check because they were happy to take Sam the cop’s word, and he’d vouched for Nicole. Promising to forward the lease information tomorrow, they said good-bye, excited to let their children know about the rental.
Nicole had a new home.
Suddenly overwhelmed, she tried not to panic. She had to make a list of things to do—talk to Joe, her landlord, and give notice; pack up her apartment; hire movers . . . or could she do the move in short car trips?
“Are you okay?” Sam asked as they walked back across the lawn.
She nodded. “I think I’m just in shock.”
He laughed. “Good shock, I hope.”
She thought about the kitchen and the space, the beautiful bedroom with a small chaise longue giving her a place to curl up and read. “Awesome shock,” she assured him. “I’m going to love living in a house.”
“I’m going to love having you next door,” he said in a husky voice.
She shivered at the sexual innuendo inherent in his words and his tone.
She followed him inside his house and into the kitchen.
Without warning, a yawn hit. She covered her mouth but was unable to stifle the small noise that escaped, and she laughed.
“The day must be catching up with me. I’m exhausted.” She turned to Sam. “Would you mind driving me back to town?”
“Yes, I think I would mind.” He stepped closer, invading her personal space, not that she cared.
He smelled deliciously male and her exhaustion disappeared, replaced by something far more pleasurable.
“I spent the whole day apartment hunting and I worked up an appetite. I kept you company while you did your thing. The least you could do is stay and have dinner with me,” he said in a teasing but self-assured tone.
She was simultaneously amused and pleased with his blatant attempt to keep her around. “Pizza?” she asked hopefully.
“You got it,” he said, with a satisfied grin.
She guessed he hadn’t been sure she’d stay. As if she’d want to be anywhere else. These uncertain, awkward moments were normal, but she knew for sure there was nothing questionable about what she felt for this man. As long as she kept things simple and uncomplicated, she’d be fine.
“Toppings?” he asked, picking up the phone.
“Your choice. I’m easy.”
His eyes darkened at her accidental double entendre. He ordered a large everything pizza, requested delivery, pulled two beers from the fridge, and offered her one.
She nodded. “I’ve always had a weakness for cold beer. Ever since college, other girls liked wine, but I preferred beer. I still do.” But her recent life hadn’t been conducive to brew.
Tyler, his mother, her parents, and their friends all preferred expensive alcohol.
He grabbed the opener from the counter, and as he popped the tops, Nicole’s gaze fell to his broad biceps and the muscles that flexed as he moved. She stifled an appreciative sigh that caught his attention.
His gaze held hers, a wealth of desire in that one look passing between them. He placed the bottles on the counter and extended his arm toward her.
Heart pounding, she placed her palm in his rougher hand.
He pulled her against him, aligning her body with his. She acted on instinct and wrapped her arms around his neck. It felt right. Good.
He felt right.
His hand came up to cup the back of her head and he sealed his delicious lips over hers. They’d been dancing around this moment, building the yearning since the last time. The Nicole she knew didn’t have such fire and intensity of any emotions burning in her veins, needing to get out.
With Sam, she did.
So, apparently, did he.
There was no way she could not respond, and she kissed him back with more passion than she’d known she possessed—sliding her lips sensuously over his, opening and inviting him inside. He kissed her back like a starving man who was now devouring what he needed and taking more, storing up as if he’d never have enough. His hands moved from her head to her cheeks, his thumbs smoothing over her skin, causing small electric shocks all over. A heaviness throbbed in her breasts and a definite pulsing began down below.
Unable to stop herself, she inched closer, threading her fingers through his shaggy hair. His masculine groan of appreciation reverberated through her. Oh, yes, they were in this together, and she liked that as much as she liked him.
His lips swept down her cheek, her neck, and finally landed on the sweet spot near her throat, where he took his time, nuzzling and nipping at her skin. This time she moaned. While he licked and teased her there, his fingers slid up her shirt and soon he cupped her aching breasts in his hard, hot hands. She arched her back, pressing herself against him, and he squeezed her harder, eliciting another moan. Heat settled between her thighs, and she squirmed, needing his touch there now more than ever.
Sam couldn’t mistake her desire, not when she smelled so sweet, and she was so pliant in his arms. Her breasts filled his palms, each just slightly larger than his hand, and when she arched into him, the pebbled points of her nipples pricked his skin. His cock throbbed against his jeans, but he ignored his own needs, right now content to test just how sensitive she was and enjoy fulfilling her wants.
He brushed his thumbs over the lace fabric of her bra, turning her nipples into even firmer darts, and she gripped his hair harder, a clear signal not to stop. He couldn’t if he wanted to. He was lost in this woman, like nothing he’d ever experienced before. He didn’t want to break the kiss. Hell, as much he wanted to thrust inside her hot, willing body, he could kiss her like this forever.
And he would have, had her cell phone not rung, interrupting the moment.
He groaned and stepped back, his forehead still touching hers.
“Go ahead. Get it,” he said, silently cursing whoever was on the phone.
With a disappointed sigh, she headed for the other room where her phone was, leaving him feeling the loss. He shook his head, knowing how crazy that sounded. Still, he was enjoying everything about Nicole—and the fact that she was moving in next door meant all systems were go between them.
He heard her steps as she came back to the kitchen.
As she entered the room, he glanced at her, noticing she was paler than before and a lot less relaxed.
“What’s wrong?”
“I . . .”
Nerves pricked at his skin. “Just say it,” he told her, recognizing that her hesitation meant nothing good.
“Macy called. I had a visitor at her restaurant. Someone looking for me here in Serendipity.”
Sam narrowed his gaze. “Okay . . . I’m sure you told people at home where you were going, so why would a visitor be a surprise?”
“Umm, there’s two parts to that answer,” she said without meeting his gaze. “One, I told my parents where I was going, but there’s a good chance they didn’t actually hear me. They aren’t interested in anything more than me staying home and not messing up their plans.”
“What sort of plans?” he asked, suddenly edgy.
She bit down on her lower lip. The same lower lip he’d been suckling on minutes before. “I was engaged.”
The word echoed around the room and slammed into his brain.
“I broke it off before I left Manhattan and moved here to start over,” she said, her words coming out on a rush.
Only one word stood out in Sam’s mind. “Engaged,” he repeated.
“Was engaged.”
“So there’s an ex-fiancé out there,” he said, and as he spoke, he realized just who was in town, causing her to panic. “And he’s the one who’s here.”
She nodded, eyes wide. “But it’s over between us. I’ve told him it’s over. I haven’t been taking his calls because I don’t want to give him the wrong impression. So I have no idea why he’d come.” She rubbed her hands together, her panic and nervousness obvious.
Which were weird reactions, if he thought about it, but beyond having to confess to an awkward omission, he couldn’t understand why she’d be so flustered. Then again, what did he know about the relationship between her and her ex-fiancé? He’d learned long ago not to think he knew people—Sam had set up one of his best friends with what he thought was a stand-up guy, only to find out once they were married that he was nothing of the sort.
Sam rubbed a hand over his face, exhaustion and frustration suddenly claiming him. He couldn’t believe this night had done such a one-eighty.
But he only had one focus, one part of this story that involved him. “If the guy was your fiancé, chances are he had good reason to have the impression that you loved him,” he said with bite, because he’d been in that ex’s shoes and he knew what it felt like to have a woman break things off.
In Sam’s case, left at the altar was an accurate statement, so he understood being blindsided. He didn’t want to feel bad for the guy, who was probably here to try to talk Nicole into coming back to him. But hadn’t he done the same thing? Right after Jenna ended things, he’d tried to get her to remember the good times, the plans they’d made. He’d tried to understand when she’d changed her mind—and why he’d been too blind to see it. To this day, he didn’t have a clue.
“I thought I loved him,” Nicole said, interrupting Sam’s mental trip into the past. “And then I realized I didn’t,” she continued.
He swallowed hard, wondering just how easily she’d walked away from her ex. And how fickle would she become with him after a while? He shifted uncomfortably, this whole situation too sudden and way too close to his past. It had him questioning his own judgment when it came to Nicole, and he needed time to think.
The doorbell rang, giving him a reprieve, and he went to accept the delivery. When he returned, Nicole was looking at him with wary eyes, a far cry from the heavy-lidded, desire-filled gaze of earlier.
“Are we okay?” she asked, running her hands up and down her bare arms.
“We’re fine,” he said, knowing he was lying.
He needed to sort through his tangled emotions, which were clearly confusing Nicole and bringing up a past he wanted to put behind him. He wasn’t sure how to accomplish that feat.
So they ate in awkward silence, and eventually Sam drove Nicole back to her apartment over Joe’s. When she got out of the car, he didn’t mention their planned date tomorrow night after the softball game.
And neither did she.
Nicole paced her apartment, not easy considering how small an area she had to walk, but she couldn’t sleep. Nerves, anxiousness and not a little bit of panic raced through her. Not only because she’d clearly messed things up with Sam, but also because Tyler was in town. And that made no sense at all.
She’d dumped him. Most men’s egos would prevent them from calling, texting, or begging for a reconciliation. Initially after the breakup, he’d gone silent, as she’d expected. It wasn’t until she’d arrived in Serendipity that he’d begun to call her.
Now he was here. Which raised the question, why the shift? What was he doing here?
Unable to settle her stomach, she still had to try to sleep. She didn’t. At least, she didn’t think she did. She tossed and turned, awakening early the next morning.
After a quick shower, she dressed, her thoughts bouncing from having to deal with Tyler to Sam’s unexpectedly harsh reaction to her past. She just didn’t understand the extent of his withdrawal. It wasn’t like she was still engaged to Tyler. She’d been nothing but up front and aboveboard with her ex as soon as she’d realized she didn’t feel the way she should if she was going to marry him. But Sam acted like she’d left Tyler at the altar or something equally cruel.
She’d called Macy last night for more information, and Macy told her Tyler would be at the restaurant this morning. As much as Nicole wanted to get this meeting over with, she couldn’t go anywhere until she had her scheduled phone call with her sister.
Her mind was on everything but Vicky, yet Nicole needed to give her twin one hundred percent of her attention. She’d never seen Vicky try so hard to control her disorder, work with therapists, take her meds, and truly want to make amends for her behavior.
At least the gravity of what she’d done had finally sunk in. The incidents with Erin had escalated until Victoria had tried to run her over with her car. Only once she’d been medicated and thinking clearly had Vicky’s own behavior scared her, and Nicole was willing to do anything to help her sister overcome her past and try to live as close to a normal, healthy life as possible. Someone had to, as their parents considered both girls a lost cause when it came to representing their high standards.
At nine A.M. on the dot, Nicole’s cell rang and she answered, settling in the middle of her bed for the conversation. “Hello?”
“Hi,” Vicky said, sounding clear and present.
“Hi yourself.” Nicole paused, always uncomfortable asking the usual how are you when her twin was in a mental hospital for the criminally insane. At least the institution where she was housed was filled with minimal-behavior-problem inmates. Hopefully, her stay would be temporary, contingent on good behavior and doctors’ reports to the court.
“So tell me what’s going on in your life,” Vicky said, before Nicole had to fill in the silence.
Nicole paused, knowing her sister was still too fragile to confide in about her own troubles. Vicky’s recent behavior meant Nicole couldn’t yet trust her to stay on medication and keep a secret about what Tyler’s father had done. And though Vicky knew Nicole had moved to Serendipity, Nicole was still hesitant to talk about the town and remind her sister of Cole and her behavior there.
“I recognize that silence . . . you’re afraid to talk to me,” Vicky correctly said. “But my therapist said I shouldn’t avoid conversation or worry about triggers while I’m in here. That this is the best place for me to be while testing the waters, so to speak. So stop worrying so much and tell me about your life in Serendipity.”
“The twin connection at work again?” Nicole asked, figuring that was how her sister knew what she’d been thinking.
“No, it’s just obvious.”
To Nicole’s surprise, Vicky giggled, sounding like the little girl she’d once been. The warm sound helped her relax, and she leaned back against the pillows and the wall.
Freed up to talk about Sam, Nicole decided that was as far as she’d go with her own situation. “Okay, well—remember the cop who arrested me when he thought I was you? Sam Marsden?”
“The good-looking guy with the shaggy blond hair? How could I forget?”
“Maybe because you’ve always been drawn more to the dark-haired types,” Nicole said, teasing.
“Are you seeing him?”
Nicole swallowed hard. “I was—I’m supposed to catch up with him after his softball game tonight, but something happened and now I’m not so sure.”
She went on to tell her sister about the house she’d agreed to lease, her night with Sam, kisses included—because who else could she tell but her twin—and how things had imploded after Macy’s phone call.
“So now I have to head over to the restaurant this morning to deal with Tyler.” Nicole’s stomach churned at the thought. “Why can’t the man take no for an answer?” she asked out loud.
“Because you’re special, that’s why,” Victoria said.
Nicole opened her mouth, then closed it again. She couldn’t remember the last compliment her twin had given her.
Ever.
The older she got, the less Victoria had been interested in Nicole’s life, too self-absorbed to think about anyone but herself. Over time, it had become hard not to resent her twin, but as an adult and with her sister’s diagnosis, Nicole had worked hard at overcoming that feeling. Victoria hadn’t chosen to be as she was.
“Thanks, but come on. I’m not that special.”
Vicky snorted. “Really. You’re a good person, Nic. You give of yourself even when others don’t give back. Me included. Well, me especially. But in Tyler’s case, he knows how good he had it with you.”
Nicole hoped and prayed that was all Tyler thought. She was beginning to wonder if maybe he was involved in things with the firm and was here to persuade her to keep quiet.
Nicole forced her mind onto the conversation with her sister. “But I don’t love him the way I should in order to marry him.”
“And you’ll just have to keep gently driving that point home. You wouldn’t want to end up with him stalking you,” Vicky said lightly.
“Don’t do that.”
“If I can joke about it, you should be able to as well.”
Nicole managed a smile. “Who are you and what have you done with my twin?” She decided to take her sister at her word and not sidestep the issues she was working so hard to overcome. “You sound great. You’re focused on things around you, me included. And you haven’t once talked about yourself. So now I’m giving you permission. Tell me how things are really going.”
Her sister’s sigh gave away more than her perky voice had. “It’s lonely here. But let’s face it, I’m not in this place to make friends, and I don’t want to. So I’m focused on getting better.”
“That’s a good thing. And I told you I’d come visit.” The institution was two hours away, but Nicole was more than willing to make the drive.
“No! I don’t want you to see me here.” Vicky’s voice rose in panic.
“Whatever you want,” Nicole quickly assured her.
It would have to be enough that they were talking weekly on the phone. Early on, Victoria wasn’t willing to even do that. Their more recent phone calls were proof that the medication-and-therapy combination were working.
“I have to get going,” Vicky said, before Nicole could ask if she’d been in contact with their parents.
Nicole already guessed the answer was no. In their eyes, Victoria was now a public embarrassment, so her parents would ignore her completely. At least they were paying for her lawyer and other expenses, hoping their daughter’s recovery would help their public perception, which was all they cared about.
“You make sure to fix things with the hot cop,” Vicky said. “I’ll talk to you next week.”
“Looking forward to it already,” Nicole said.
“Bye.”
“Love you.”
Vicky paused, then whispered “Good-bye” before disconnecting the call. She still found it hard to reach out, or to say things like I love you or I miss you, but today’s phone call had been the best so far.
With little things changing, Nicole felt the return of the bond she and her sister had shared when they were young. It also felt like a missing piece of herself was being returned to her—filled up slowly, like sand in an hourglass. And Nicole was grateful for each minuscule bit she received. She was also afraid to trust that it would last, having seen Victoria regress more times than she wanted to recall. Still, she reminded herself she’d never seen her at the low point she’d been at after her arrest, nor had she ever watched her try so intently for recovery.
Hope, Nicole thought, was a scary, elusive thing—no matter what kind of relationship was involved. For someone who’d been consistently rejected and ignored by her parents, the very people she should trust to be there for her, the fear of being hurt or rejected—by Sam especially—remained.
Pushing off those thoughts, she refocused on her most pressing problem: Her ex-fiancé.
Sam had the day off, so he agreed to meet Cara at The Family Restaurant for breakfast. He was in a pissed-off mood and his sister-in-law noticed immediately.
“Well? Are you going to answer me? What, or should I say who, has you in such a foul mood?”
Sam shoveled a mouthful of scrambled eggs into his mouth, ignoring Cara’s question for the second time.
“You’re not getting laid? Is that it?”
“God damn, you’re persistent. Would you talk about something else besides me?”
“Nope. You’re so much fun to annoy.” She pushed her uneaten breakfast away. “But the real reason is I hate to see you so worked up, so talk to me.”
“It’s Nicole,” Macy said, coming up from behind them and squeezing into the booth alongside Cara.
“Eavesdropping? Seriously, have you no shame?” Sam asked.
But knowing she’d met the ex last night, Sam was glad to have her here. Not that he’d give her the satisfaction of admitting as much.
Macy met Cara’s amused gaze. “No, none.” She glanced from Cara’s plate in the center of the table to Cara herself. “What’s wrong with the food?” she asked.
“Nothing. I’m just not hungry,” Cara said.
Macy frowned. “Can I get you something else?”
Cara shook her head, and even Sam wondered what was wrong. She usually out-ate him without worrying about calories. She had a great body and metabolism, not that Sam noticed much because she was his good friend and his brother’s wife.
“I’m fine. Talk to me about Nicole.”
Sam rolled his eyes. “Her ex-fiancé is in town.”
“I didn’t know she had one of those,” Cara said, eyes widening.
“Me neither.” Sam ground his teeth.
“Same,” Macy said. “Although I met him last night and I have to say, yum yum.”
Sam shot her a nasty look.
“Not helping the cause,” Cara reminded her.
Macy blushed. “Oops. But come on. I asked who ended things and he said Nicole did. So obviously you have nothing to worry about where she’s concerned.”
He ignored her and took a drink of his coffee.
“He’s not speaking today. To anyone, apparently,” Cara said.
“Well, he’s listening, so I’ll just mention that I told Tyler—that’s his name—to come here this morning for breakfast. And Nicole called and asked me to save a table in the back so she could talk to him without being interrupted.”
Sam’s stomach twisted hard.
“She said she wanted to make sure he understood she was serious about breaking up.” Macy stared hard at Sam. “Do you hear what I’m saying?”
“His head’s still in the past, isn’t it?” Cara asked. “Now that you know Nicole broke her engagement once, you’re worried she’s just like Jenna. That you can’t trust her or your feelings for her. Am I right?”
Before he could react, Macy reached across the table and slapped the side of his head. “Hey! That’s ridiculous.”
“When you’re the one left stranded the morning of your wedding, then talk to me about what’s ridiculous.” He retrieved his wallet and threw money on the table, enough to cover his and Cara’s breakfast, and rose from his seat.
“You’re leaving? Before you see Nicole? Before you offer your support? Before you remind her you’re here for her?”
Sam glared at Macy, annoyed with her intrusiveness.
“Oh, I’m sorry. Go right ahead and leave the door open for Tyler Stanton, since Nicole already thinks you’re disappointed in her for breaking her engagement.” She waved a hand in dismissal.
With a grumble, Sam lowered himself back into the booth, unwilling to say Macy had a damn good point. He might not be happy about the situation or Nicole’s past, but no way would he step aside. Which meant he’d have to get over himself and his history—at least enough to admit he still wanted Nicole. Which meant they’d have to have an open, honest conversation and make it clear they weren’t talking about a serious relationship between them. Just some feel-good sex while it lasted. He thought they were in agreement, but he’d feel better knowing for sure.
All well and good, Sam thought, knowing that what he wanted didn’t take into consideration her ex-fiancé.
Which left him the odd man out while they spoke this morning. Waiting. Wondering.
Hoping for the best.