Chapter 4
"Don't even bother." I point directly at Nathan's receptionist as I scoot past her on my way to his open office door.
"Ms. Ross, he's not…" her voice trails behind me just as I reach the doorway.
"Jessica?" The surprise in his tone is unmistakable. "What are you doing here?"
Normally I'd take offense at his reaction to my showing up unannounced at his office, but seeing how I almost decked him alongside Drew at the bar two nights ago, I can't blame him for the question.
"Come in." He motions towards one of the chairs in front of his desk as he closes the door. "I need to be in a meeting in a few minutes."
"We do this now, or we don't do it." I don't move my gaze from the bank of windows behind his desk. I haven't slept more than an hour since I saw him with Drew at the bar. If I don't get answers now I'm going to cease to be responsible for my actions. Call it a plea of temporary insanity or better yet, a plea of sanity. Who in their right mind wouldn't want to torture these two bastards after what they did?
I don't make eye contact with him as he picks up his desk phone and punches three keys. "Cancel the rest of my day." I feel his gaze burning into me as he pauses before continuing, "I don't give a shit, just do it." He slams the phone down before sitting in front of me on the edge of his desk.
"Why?" It's really the one and only question I have.
"Why what?" His tone is even and controlled. He's not going to make this easy for me.
I pull my eyes up the lapel of his navy suit jacket before settling on his icy blue eyes. "Why do this to me? Why?"
"Do what?" he chirps back.
I run my hands over my face trying to erase the distress from my expression. "Seriously?"
"What you heard at the bar was out of context." Naturally, he'd say that to me. It's what any good lawyer says to someone when they're trying to win a case. The only problem is that this case is my life and he's already f*cked it up so badly that I can't tell up from down anymore.
"I heard you say that you f*cked my sweet little body," I sneer as the words leave my lips. I've replayed those five words in my mind repeatedly every second since I first heard him say them. "You talked to him about f*cking me." I point my finger into my own chest as if to distinguish my body from all of the hundreds of others he's f*cked over the years.
"Jessica." He takes a heavy swallow. "None of this was about you."
It couldn't sting more if he would have slapped me directly across my face. "It was all about me."
He drops to one knee now, trapping my body in the chair. There's nothing floating in the air between us this time but bitter anger and resentment. Anything his body may be trying to convey to me is being swallowed by my loathing for him. "It was about Cassie."
"Cassie?" I parrot her name back. "You f*cked me because of Cassie?"
He shakes his head and I watch his eyes skirt over my body. "I f*cked you because I can't get enough of you. I want you more than anyone. I've told you all this."
"Before I knew that you bet money on my ass." I try to stand but his frame is unyielding. He doesn't budge. His expression remains serious and passive.
"Do you want to hear what happened or not?" The question is a challenge. There's an undercurrent of impatience woven into it.
I lean back in the chair to try and find some air. "Tell me then."
"You'll listen?" He cocks both brows expectantly. "Jessica, you're going to listen to me?"
"Whatever. Talk." I push back on his shoulder wanting him to retreat. I can't breathe when he's close to me and I can't sort through my tangled thoughts when I don't have space to think.
"It's complicated." He pivots back on his heel. "It's so f*cking complicated."
"Don't bother then." I shove his chest to try to skirt my way around him. "Coming here was a mistake."
"I met Cassie at the same club I met you." His gaze is direct. "She was a wreck."
"A wreck?" I exhale. I can already sense where this is going. He's going to use Cassie's emotional wellbeing as an excuse for him being a complete and total douchebag.
"She was so wasted." He rolls his eyes. "She was falling over and some guy was ready to drag her out of the club to his place."
"So you recused her?" The words are fraught with sarcasm. I don't give a shit if they have skepticism written all over them. All I want is the truth, plain, simple and no holds barred.
He leans forward again, his breath skirting across my cheek. "I helped her avoid a situation she'd regret." His tone is cold, clipped and harsh.
"Then what?" At the rate this is going I'm never going to get to the bottom of his bet with Drew.
"Jessica." His finger jumps to my jaw and I recoil at the touch. "You came here for answers, so you need to listen."
I regret coming here. It was reckless of me to get in a taxi and race over here hoping he would actually tell me anything that even bordered on the truth. I should have followed my gut instinct and gone to see Cassandra.
"I'm listening," I bite back. "You met Cassandra at the same club you met me, you saved her from a big bad wolf who wanted to stick his dick in her and you f*cked her instead."
"Jesus, Jessica." He leans back to pull himself to his feet. "Shut the hell up and listen to me."