The mattress shifted, and Cali rolled over. Her mom sat at the foot of the bed. Just a dream. “Call who?”
“Sara. Your student, the one whose mother has cancer. Call and remind her that her mom needs a second opinion.”
Cali recalled the fear she’d seen in Sara’s eyes. “What do you know?” Cali’s chest constricted.
“Just that you need to call, dear. Convince her.”
In the dream, Cali sat up and watched her mom blow smoke rings.
A smile tilted her mom’s lips. “Do you remember when you sat in my lap and asked me to make smoke Os?”
Cali nodded. “Yeah, I remember.”
Her mom studied the cigarette. “I would have never smoked around you if I’d known how bad it was.” Silence fell like a soft rain, and her mom toyed with her bracelets. “You know, your father wasn’t all bad in the beginning.”
Cali considered telling her that she didn’t want to talk about him. Her mother had brought him up once or twice those last weeks of her life, but Cali had always managed to steer the topic away. It hurt to talk about him. Hurt to remember the few vague memories she had of the man who’d walked out of her life.
Her mother pulled the cigarette to her lips. “I should have made him leave. But I wanted to fix him. Like you, I was a fixer. I thought if I loved him enough he would change.” Her mom stared at Cali as if trying to read her mind. “Oh, God,” her mom said as tears filled her eyes. “You heard us that night, didn’t you?”
“What night?” Cali felt a familiar ache stir in her chest.
A tear rolled down her mom’s face. “Why didn’t I figure this out?”
The memory surfaced in Cali’s mind. She was four. She hugged her worn teddy bear in her arms and stood outside her parent’s bedroom door. The loud voices had woken her up. Sometimes he screamed really loudly at her mother, and Cali wanted to make sure her mama was okay.
“I’m so sorry,” her mother said. “I should have realized. That’s why you hated kindergarten and summer camps. You were afraid I’d leave you.”
Cali closed her eyes as the memory replayed her father’s voice. “Just leave her. She’s always in the way. Someone else will care for her. The state has homes for kids. Come with me.” Her father had wanted her mom to give her away.
“Oh, baby.” Her mother’s voice shook with emotion. “You’ve been afraid all this time. And now I have left you.”
Cali swallowed the lump of pain. “You were a great mom.” And she meant it. Her mother had put her first—over her career, over the occasional men she’d dated. Cali had never questioned her place in her mother’s life. She’d been first. Now Cali wondered if that had been right for her mom to do that.
“We did okay, didn’t we?” Her mother brushed a hand over Cali’s shoulder. Warmth seeped from her touch, and the age-old hurt began to disappear.
Her mom swung around and looked at the door. For a second, she appeared panicked, then she relaxed. “The detective really isn’t a dickhead, Cali.”
“I know,” she said.
“And there’s nothing wrong with how you eat.”
Cali sighed. “I know that, too.” She leaned back into the pillow and felt the next realm of sleep calling her. “I’m so tired, Mom.”
“You shouldn’t stay here again. Tomorrow, find a different place.” She stood and went to stand by the door, staring at it as if she could see out. “Find another motel room, or—”
“I’m fine.” Cali felt her mind slipping away.
“You’re not fine. Don’t tune me out, girl. You have to listen. Cali...”
~
Brit quietly opened his car door, gun aimed, finger on the trigger. He made it to the hood of his SUV when the man walked to the next hotel door, pulled out a card key from his pocket and let himself in.
Relaxing his grip on the gun, Brit took a deep breath. He couldn’t do it. He couldn’t leave her when a man who’d already committed three murders was looking for her. Grabbing his cell phone from his pocket, he hit the memory button until he found Quarles’ number.
Brit spoke as soon as his partner answered. “Remember the diner from yesterday? Meet me at the hotel parking lot across the street.”
“That chick’s there, isn’t she?” Quarles asked.
Brit hadn’t explained last night, but he knew Quarles had been suspicious. Brit hadn’t wanted to admit it then, but now he didn’t care what Quarles knew. “Yeah. Just meet me there. And tell Adams we’re going to be out all night.” Brit looked at his watch, thinking about his appointment with Payne at midnight. “And hurry.”
~
Twenty minutes later, his partner pulled up beside him. Brit gave him the short explanation about his meeting with Payne.
“No,” Quarles said. “Let me go talk to Payne. You stay here and babysit. You’re the one who has the hots for her.”