Somewhere in the recesses of her brain, Cali knew this was a dream. She didn’t care. She needed to hear her mother’s voice.
Suddenly, the dream went visual, and her mom sat on the end of her bed. She wore one of the navy business suits that she’d always worn to the real estate office. Her hair, kept red with Nice & Easy’s help, bounced around her face. She looked good. Healthy, not like the twig of a woman who’d died in Cali’s arms last week.
Cali blinked. “Who thinks Tanya is a lesbian?”
“That guy living with you.”
“He’s not living with me. Just staying until his apartment is available.”
“And how long has that been?” Her mom’s brow arched. “I know why you never introduced me. You knew I wouldn’t like him.”
Regret stirred in Cali’s stomach. “You were sick and—”
“Doesn’t matter.” Gold bracelets jingled down her mother’s wrist as she raised a cigarette to her lips. “He reminds you of somebody we used to know, doesn’t he?”
“Who?”
Smoke rings floated up and faded into the air as her mother spoke. “You know who.”
Cali didn’t know, but didn’t care. She studied the cigarette. “You quit five years ago.”
“Yeah, but bad habits die hard.”
Even asleep, Cali marveled at the absurdity of the dream. Mom smoking and talking about lesbians.
“You know why he thinks Tanya is a lesbian?” her mom asked.
“What do you know about lesbians?”
“Betty, my hospice nurse. She’s a lesbian. Did you know there are tools that they strap on? A fake...you know what. Oh, damn, I’m dead, I can say penis, can’t I?” Her mom’s laughter hugged Cali’s heart. It didn’t matter that her mom spoke about fake penises, or that this was just a dream. It felt good to see her without the pain shadowing her eyes.
“Betty has a partner. Been together for years.” Her mom took a long, pleasurable drag on her cigarette. “The reason the weasel thinks Tanya’s a lesbian is because she didn’t respond to his flirting at the funeral. He thinks any woman who doesn’t go weak-kneed for him is gay.”
“He didn’t flirt with Tanya.” Cali squeezed her pillow a little tighter.
“Ask her.” Her mom looked over her shoulder. “You’d better get dressed. He’s coming home, and you know what he’ll think if he sees you in bed naked.”
The sound of her front door opening knee-jerked her from the dream. She leapt up, naked, and darted to the dresser. Tugging a nightshirt on, she expected Stan to walk in. Instead, she heard the TV click on. She fell against the dresser, trying to shake off the dream. She’d heard the door while sleeping. Mom hadn’t woken her up. Nor had she sat at the foot of the bed. Just a dream. Right?
Heavy footsteps thudded down the hall. Then the bedroom door swung open. He tossed her extra set of keys on the dresser. They clanked against the mirror.
“You want to talk about this?” His words came out slurred. He’d been drinking.
Now wasn’t the time to talk. “It’s late.”
“So no sex tonight either, huh?”
His bullying tone had her clenching her toes, and she realized she still had cotton between them. “We’ll talk tomorrow.” When she’d tell him he had to move out.
“Fine. But you may want to take a shower. This room reeks of a bar.” He slammed the door.
Cali inhaled a deep gulp of Marlboro-scented air. She recalled the dream of her mom smoking. Hands shaking, she walked over to the chair where she’d left her clothes. She lifted them to her nose. No cigarette smoke.
The door swung back open and whacked against the wall. She jerked around, her nose buried in the blouse.
“Got you something. Not that you’ll give a damn!” Stan tossed a small, shiny object on the bed. It picked up the light from the hall and glittered. The door slammed again.
~
The next day after school, Cali parked in front of the Arts R Us store and hurried across the parking lot to meet Tanya, who waited by the entrance.
Tanya was looking for a few art supplies and Cali was there for one thing: procrastination. And who knew, maybe between the acrylics and oils, she’d find a tube of liquid courage. She hated conflict. And telling Stan he needed to find his own place had conflict warnings stamped all over it.
She met Tanya and they hurried in to escape the cold wind. When Cali pushed the door, her sweater sleeve pulled up.
“Hot damn!” Tanya grabbed Cali’s wrist and eyed the tennis bracelet with diamond-filled, flower-shaped studs linked together. “Is this new?”
“Yeah.” Unlike Tanya, Cali wasn’t the bling-bling type. But when she’d found Stan MIA this morning, she’d felt guilty for not even thanking him for the present, so she wore it. Not that it changed anything. She was still asking him to move out, because frankly, she’d never asked him to move in.
“Is it real?” Tanya gawked at the bracelet.
“No,” she said. “Cubic Zirconia, I’m sure.”
Tanya twisted the bracelet around Cali’s wrist. “Looks real.”