“Don’t be.” I wanted to smack myself for speaking so loosely. “I don’t know anything. I’m probably not.”
“Oh girly.” Adelle rushed me and threw one of her long arms around my shoulders, pressing her cheeks flat against mine. “If you really feel that you are, I expect it’s true. Your body has its ways of telling you.”
“Exactly.” Bri winked at her mother as she teased her, bouncing Ellie up and down on her knee to soothe her.
Adelle directed me to sit next to her near the fire. “I know that I’m not really your mother, but I consider all three of you girls,” she looked around at me, Bri, and Blaire. “part mine. I’m thrilled that I may have another grandbaby coming. And don’t you fret, Blaire. It will happen with time. When it’s meant to.”
Blaire smiled politely, but I could see doubt in her eyes. “I hope that ye are right, Adelle. I’m verra afraid that all the years I spent saying that I dinna want children have come back to punish me now that I do.”
Adelle waved a hand in dismissal. “Oh sweetie, that’s just not the way things work. Do you know how many people say they don’t want children and end up with a hoard? Sometimes, it just takes time.”
Mary, the Conalls’ beloved cook and castle maid, spoke up. “Aye, and even if it doesna come, children will find ye that are no yer own but ye love them just as much as if they were. Kip and I werena able to have children, but Eoin and Arran are no less mine than if I pushed them out of meself.”
“Have you tried to get in touch with Morna? I bet she’d be happy to help if she could.” Surely the thought crossed her mind, but I wanted to say something. I felt bad for speaking so foolishly.
Blaire smiled genuinely and nodded, her eyes wide. “Aye, I’m sure she would help, and that is precisely why I doona wish to ask for it. I know the meddling lass too well. She would no only give me one but three at once if it pleased her. That wouldna please me at all.”
All of us who knew Morna laughed and nodded in agreement, only stopping as Rhona entered carrying a tray of food. “’Tis no verra much, lassies, but I doona expect that any of ye have much of an appetite anyway. I dinna see the need to go to much of a fuss without the men here. Too much of the food would go to waste.”
“Thank you. Where are all the other girls?” Despite the lifted morale that resulted in the talk of babies, a cool breeze of warning swept down the back of my neck, and I suddenly felt very uneasy.
“They are all sleeping together in me own cottage on the castle grounds. They should be locked up safely for the evening. I wouldna allow them to go far from me while the lads are away.”
“Good.” I waved her in so that she would move closer to us. “And you will stay here with us.”
“If ’tis what ye wish, I shall.” She placed the tray of food in the center of the room. It didn’t take long before Adelle dug in, and shortly after the other women followed.
Before Rhona entered, I thought myself hungry, but appetite eluded me as the sense of unease seemed to grow within me. I sat back. As I cast my attention to the darkest corners of the room, my attention drew to Nairne for the very first time that evening.
She said nothing as the rest of us spoke, given no sign of congratulations during talk of the maybe-baby. I knew she was grief-stricken over the loss of her son, but still, it seemed to me that she stayed too quiet. Her chair set slightly away from the rest of the group, the back of it covered in darkness. The fire barely cast a light on her, but I could make little of her out from where I sat.
I stood. Something deep within me screamed for me not to take a step near her, but I knew that I must. No one else noticed my slow approach toward her. I had to drag my feet to continue. I stopped as soon as I stood close enough to see her.
The blood drained from my face as I looked into her eyes.
They were open, but cold. And she could not see me.
Chapter 41
At The Edge of McMillan Territory
His heart beat painfully in his chest. There was no choice but to go forward, to find his brother and end him before he could harm another person he loved, but a deep wrongness hung in the air. Each hoof step that brought him and all the men with him further away from McMillan Castle made Baodan more certain.
“Halt!” He screamed the word, yanking hard on his horse’s reins.
“Baodan, what are ye doing? We doona need to be away any longer than we must. Let us ride and end all of this.”
Her heart thumped loudly in his hears. Nothing else around him, not his brother’s voice, nor the sound of horses whining at their sudden stop could overwhelm the sound of it. He yearned for Mitsy’s presence whenever away from her, but only in his dreams did he sense her presence so completely, until now. She was frightened and in danger. He could sense it.