“Don’t do this shit again.”
There was silence on the other end of the phone and he thought for a second that maybe she had hung up on him.
“Okay, Brian. Sorry,” she finally mumbled.
He hit the “end” button and tossed the phone on the other side of him.
“You alright?” Destiny asked quietly, still stroking his shoulders. She’d risen up on her knees behind him and was using both hands to lightly massage his back.
He nodded quickly, mostly out of habit.
“So she’s staying at her friend’s house, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, Lexi usually listens to you. I’m sure they’ll be fine, Brian.”
She kissed his jaw and resumed her light massaging on his shoulders.
“And hopefully she’ll have a really bad hangover in the morning, so bad that she never wants to drink again.”
He released a short, humorless laugh.
“That never worked for you. I remember babysitting you through more than one hangover.”
She chuckled softly. “Whatever.”
He shook his head, his smile fading as he released a sigh.
“You know I used to drink sometimes at that age too,” Destiny reminded him. “You and Dorian were bad influences on me.”
“Yeah, but that was different.”
“How?” she asked, her hands stopping for a moment.
“Me and D were with you. We never let you actually get drunk and we watched you. We were older. You thought you were doing something, but your environment was always controlled by us.”
Her hands were working again and she stayed silent.
“I dunno,” he sighed. “It seems like she’s starting to slip up more often. Like this shit is becoming a habit. Staying out past her curfew, getting drunk, not telling Clara and Alfred where she is.”
He must’ve tensed up because he felt her fingers working a bit more firmly on his neck and shoulders. He tried to relax under her touch, even though his mind was working overtime. He stared blankly at the black and white pictures of the sky in its various elements decorating the wall above his small desk. He was used to fixing things. If there was a problem, he analyzed it and figured out the best solution to solve it. But being so far away, he felt helpless. And guilty. Always guilty.
Before he left Phoenix, he was the one who made sure Alexis stayed on track—dropping by Clara and Alfred’s almost every night to check up on her, attending her games, taking her to get physicals and whatever other random things needed to be done. But it felt like his hands were tied now being so far away.
“I’ll call and talk to her,” Destiny said. “You know, see where her head is.”
He sighed.
“She’s a smart girl, Brian,” she asserted. “She’ll be okay.”
She leaned and kissed his jaw again. Even though he didn’t really want her having to deal with his shit, he appreciated the offer. Alexis looked up to Destiny and it might help for her to have some girl talk, or whatever women did with each other. She sure as hell wasn’t getting it from their mom.
“Have you…” she paused. “I guess you haven’t found any leads about where your mom might be?”
She asked the question tentatively. He knew she didn’t like bringing up Teresa or her whereabouts because she understood that it was a source of stress and tension for him.
“Nah,” he answered, hoping she would drop it.
She sighed audibly. “Do you think…” she hesitated, her fingers pausing in their movements. “Do you wish you would’ve stayed in Phoenix? You know, so that you could watch over Lexi more?”
He could tell she was trying to keep her voice casual when she asked the question. Her fingers were working on his neck again but he heard the hitch in her breathing. His chest tightened and he turned, easily repositioning her so that she was lying on her back as he hovered over her.
“Where do you live?” he asked, looking down into her eyes.
“Here,” she said softly, fidgeting a little under the intensity of his gaze.
“There’s your answer.” His eyes trailed briefly to her mouth as she chewed on her lip.
She smiled slightly but concern still clouded her eyes, so he kept talking.
“I was suffocating in Phoenix, honestly,” he admitted, leaning down next to her on one elbow. “I wanted to do something different. I needed to feel something different.”
She turned her head slightly so that she could study his face.
“I think you were the something,” he said, grinning crookedly.
“So you just wanted me?” she asked, some of the seriousness finally leaving her eyes as she smiled.
“Yep.”
“And what would’ve happened if you didn’t get me?” she teased. She was starting to lighten up and he grinned again.
“We both know I’m the shit, so that wasn’t even an option.”
“Conceited much?” she asked, struggling to suppress a grin.