Erin laughed like she had said something funny, though Cassie wasn’t sure what. This didn’t necessarily mean—thinking someone was sweet wasn’t the same as wanting to date them.
Cassie took a deep breath and tried to be brave. “I know you said you didn’t want to date me, but I thought—”
Erin pulled back, her brow furrowed. “When did I say that?”
“Last weekend,” Cassie said. “You told Rachel you weren’t going to date me just because I was good in bed. And—”
Erin cut in. “That was not what I was saying. I was trying to talk myself out of telling you how I felt. If that’s all you heard then you missed me—” She cut herself off, and Cassie would really like to know what she’d missed. “You missed a lot, okay? The entire point of that conversation was how much I do want to date you.”
Cassie blinked. “Really?”
“Yes,” Erin said, pressing their foreheads together before sneaking a quick kiss. One of her hands was still on Cassie’s, both of them holding the flippers together. “It feels so good to say it out loud.”
“Even though Parker—”
“Is fine with it?”
Cassie supposed that was true. “Well, yeah, but Adam—”
“Can fuck off,” Erin growled. “His opinion means absolutely nothing to me.”
“Okay, fair. There’s still the thing where I’m an idiot and only figured out I have feelings for you like three days ago.”
Erin smiled at her, so gently. “I want to be with you even though you refuse to stop coming up with reasons I shouldn’t.”
Cassie chuckled and shrugged. She couldn’t help it. This didn’t feel real.
“I want to go scuba diving with you.” Erin laughed and waved her hand around. “Or whatever the equivalent is for you. Like, I want to go to Caltech with you. Or at least come visit you every month.”
Cassie bit her lip, half smiling. “About that…”
Erin tilted her head, like a confused puppy.
“I, uh, might have been considering going to MIT instead.”
Erin’s face lit up so suddenly it seemed laughable Cassie had ever not been sure she wanted to be with her.
But Erin didn’t celebrate right away. “Not just for me, right? I don’t want you to change your dream for me.”
“Not just for you,” Cassie confirmed. “Mostly because I’m too much of a baby to be that far from Acacia, if I’m being honest. I mean, yeah, and you, and Parker. And my job, too. I didn’t really notice while it was happening but, uh, I kind of made a life for myself here that I really like.”
Erin’s smile made Cassie’s chest feel light.
“You really only figured out you had feelings for me this week?”
Cassie groaned. “I told myself we were friends with benefits. It was easier, I guess, than risking getting hurt if that’s what you thought we were, too. I don’t know. It probably wasn’t that deep, really—I’m just bad at feelings.”
Erin took the flippers from her and tossed them to the ground, which Cassie wasn’t exactly thrilled with. She made up for it by cupping Cassie’s face in both hands.
“Since you’re so bad at feelings, I want to make sure you get this,” Erin said. “When I say I want to go scuba diving with you, I mean I love you.”
Cassie felt like she was flying.
“That—I’m probably still bad at it, but I know that feeling,” she said. “Like, I mean, me too. Like, I love you, too.”
What an embarrassing way to say it for the first time. She was definitely bad with feelings. But Erin beamed at her anyway, and kissed her, and loved her.
It definitely felt fucking surreal.
They were still in the driveway for fuck’s sake.
Twenty-Six
CASSIE
Cassie was used to waking up beside Erin. Being woken up by Erin sliding one arm underneath her head and wrapping the other around her, skin pressing against skin, wasn’t unusual.
“Morning,” Erin murmured into Cassie’s ear.
“Morning.” Warmth spread throughout Cassie’s body.
She still wasn’t fully awake yet, but when Erin’s hand started wandering, Cassie was ready.
It wasn’t the first or even the tenth day they’d woken up with morning sex, but it was different. This time, with her fingers inside Cassie and their faces close, close, close, Erin nudged her nose into Cassie’s and said, “I love you.”
Cassie came.
Acacia’s flight was due in a little before noon. Parker picked Cassie up from Erin’s on the way to the airport.
Cassie met her in the foyer, trying not to be awkward. It seemed Parker didn’t have to try. She threw her arms around Cassie and held on tight.
“You okay?”
“Yeah,” Cassie said, still only half believing it. “You?”
“Yeah. My dad managed not to have an aneurysm yesterday, which is probably the best we could hope for. We didn’t totally fuck up your night, did we?”
Cassie laughed. How were they even talking about this? “I mean, kinda. But we managed.”
“Good,” Parker said. “You ready to go or do you need to kiss my mom goodbye first?”
She cackled at whatever Cassie’s face did in response. Cassie wasn’t even sure what it was—something between a cringe and an attempt at a smile.
“I’m ready.”
“Be back in an hour, Mom!” Parker called on their way out the door.
The last time she’d gone to the airport, Cassie had fallen asleep in the front seat, Erin’s hand gentle on her thigh. It was supposed to have been the end of whatever was between them. It was the last rule Erin had made and the last they broke. Six months later, Parker asked if Cassie wanted to kiss Erin goodbye before they left. Other than that, though, she acted normal the whole ride: talked about how excited she was to see Acacia, who all was coming over to swim today, where they’d watch the fireworks tomorrow. She cranked the volume on the radio and belted along to Olivia Rodrigo.
Cassie spent the whole time trying to believe Parker was being sincere. She gave no indication she wasn’t, but Cassie still had a hard time trusting it. It felt too easy. Then again, everything with Erin had always felt too easy.
Acacia was waiting on the sidewalk outside of arrivals. Her hair was still shaved close on the sides, but the top was a little longer now, styled in 360 waves. Cassie rolled down her window as they approached.
“Best friend!” she shouted, earning a glare from the airport security guard near the door.
“Best friends!” Acacia shouted back.
Cassie was out of the car before Parker had put it in park. She had never needed an Acacia hug so badly. Kaysh held on tight until Parker made it out of the car and demanded a hug of her own.
“Calm down, there’s enough of me to go around,” Acacia said as she hugged Parker.
Cassie piled into the back seat with Kaysh for the drive back. Just like talking to her on the phone last night, things felt easier with her around.
“I can’t believe you’ve gotten to spend any weekend you want here, while I was stuck in Chicago with Emerson,” Acacia said.
“Please,” Parker said, glancing at them in the rearview mirror. “Don’t pretend like you’re not insanely close with your brother. Not as close as Cassie, but still.”
Cassie groaned. “It was one time.”