Lunar Love

I peek at the photo of a fish with a parasite tongue on the background of my phone and remember the mission. Be the parasite. I’ll just start with a little Vent Drafting where I’ll type out all of my feelings and allow myself to be angry and mad. After that, I’ll write the nicer version that I’ll actually send out. If I don’t let myself vent, my frustration could evolve into something more destructive from the inside out.

I summon the words from within, wrangling each word out into the open. My fingers move cautiously over the laptop keys as my emotions find their voice. Before I know it, I’m pounding furiously against each key, pouring my wrath into the sentences.

There. Vent Draft done. Seeing the list in its entirety, there’s no way I could’ve actually sent this out. Especially not with my real name on it. It’s way too cruel. But now I feel better. Does Vent Drafting count as self-care? Because it totally should.

I exhale a long breath, clearing the air of any pessimism. Now I can focus on hyping up Lunar Love. I tap out a happier article focusing on the positive of what we do instead of getting sucked into the negative vortex of ZodiaCupid.

I lose track of time, only realizing that the workday has started when Alisha and Randall walk into the office together bubbling with excitement.

“Guess what?” Alisha asks breathlessly.

“What?” I ask, drawn into her enthusiastic tone of voice. I quickly save the completed version of the Lunar Love article into a folder in our shared company Google Drive. I move my Vent Draft to the trash, deleting it so that it never sees the light of day.

“I booked you on the Dating in La La Land podcast!” Alisha shares. “They’re doing a live panel interview with an audience. It’s on Saturday. I hope that works for you.”

I clap my hands together. “That’s amazing! I love that podcast. Consider all plans canceled. Plans being a TV marathon. Wait, who else is on the panel?” I ask, nervous that a certain competitor might be in attendance. If Bennett’s there, I’ll be exposed. But then again, I’m outed when the episode airs. If I want more information on ZodiaCupid, I’m going to have to do my digging before Saturday.

“It’s an all-women panel on dating in Los Angeles. There will be a relationships editor, a consumer research manager, some reality TV producer, and you. Sounds cool, right?” Randall joins in, plopping his bag into his chair.

I breathe out in relief. “Very. Nice work. An audience, too. I’m already nervous.”

“You’re going to be great! We’ll get you prepped before the big day. I’ll email the details over,” Alisha says, writing on a pad of paper.

I jot down the event into my planner. “Thank you! Also, I wrote an article for WhizDash. I dropped it into the shared Lunar Love folder. Search for listicle, and you should find it.”

Alisha shoots me a thumbs-up. “Good! I’ll send that to my contact. She said she was Team Lunar Love and excited to promote us.”

With the listicle out of the way, I turn my attention to my upcoming client meeting. This is where I should be putting my energy, not on some wannabe imitator app. With what feels like a tsunami wave of cancellations, I need to be at the top of my game.

At 11:00 a.m. on the dot, Harper Chen breezes through the door. Harper, founder of a boutique public relations firm specializing in the culinary world, discovered Lunar Love on her way to meet a chef to discuss details for opening day of his new restaurant just a few blocks away. When she stopped by last week, I thought she wanted directions to the restaurant, but really she was looking for more direction in her love life.

People come to us feeling optimistic, heartbroken, anxious, and motivated. Some are knowledgeable in the Chinese zodiac while others have no clue what to expect. We see it all. In times of anticipation or hopelessness, many of us look to the stars for answers and comfort. In our case, we look to the moon.

“Olivia! How are you?” Harper says. She looks sophisticated wearing a lilac linen dress that ties around the waist and a few pieces of delicate jewelry. She reaches out to give me a hug.

In the Session Room, we take seats opposite one another at a table made from reclaimed wood (another flea market score).

“It’s been eventful. Sorry about the construction noise next door. Sounds like they’re on lunch break so it shouldn’t be too distracting in here. How have you been since we spoke last week?” I ask.

“Wildly busy but in the best way. It feels like there are national food holidays happening every single day, so I’ve been pitching clients constantly for different opportunities. And there’s another big client I’m trying to land.” Harper sweeps her dark hair into a loose bun. “But I’m excited to do this. I feel the need to be honest with you, though. I’m also using dating apps.”

“Oh!” I plaster a smile on my face and keep my tone neutral. “Any in particular?”

“Just a couple of the big ones that have been around forever, and ZodiaCupid. That one’s still in beta, though.”

“I’ve heard of it,” I say.

Harper places a jeweled hand on the table. “I hope that’s okay. I figured, why not? Try multiple avenues of dating. Your way sounded charming and nostalgic, so here I am. Just giving you a heads-up. It felt kind of wrong to not tell you.”

“I appreciate that,” I say. “I have complete faith that Lunar Love won’t let you down, so don’t get too invested in ZodiaCupid.”

Harper laughs. “Well, good! I’m excited for more context about the zodiac. That’s something ZodiaCupid doesn’t do. My family celebrated Lunar New Year on and off over the years, and my dad would teach my mom, brother, and me about the upcoming year’s animal sign, but that’s pretty much the extent of it.”

“That’s a great start! Let’s dive into it,” I say. “You were born on October 10, 1988, which makes you Year of the Dragon. This is a highly desired and respected animal sign. In fact, some women opt to have C-sections so their children are born in the Dragon year.”

“That’s dedication,” Harper says, looking impressed.

“Exactly. I’ll walk through the traits of the Dragon with you, and let’s see how you identify with them. The Chinese lunar horoscope depicts Dragons as direct, enthusiastic, loyal, strong tempered, and no-nonsense. Practical. You want respect from others and will do anything to earn it.”

Harper listens carefully to each trait, nodding along and sometimes shaking her head in disagreement. Not all traits are immediately obvious and take some time to find in people, both from their perspectives and mine.

“Did you ever find out what time you were born?” I ask, propping open my notebook against my crossed leg.

Lauren Kung Jessen's books