Chapter Four
The girl who’d served me in the bar was named Rachel and she was the one Orion sent. Rachel was very talkative and I quickly learned that she was twenty seven, a former Miss Arizona, and that she was the old lady of a Defiant club member named Casper.
Rachel waited for me while I showered, luxuriating in the hot spray. I accepted the towel she handed me over the curtain and wrapped it around my body.
“How long have you been here?” I asked her.
“A little over two years. But it took over a year before Casper showed some permanent interest.”
I stepped out of the shower, hugging the towel over my breasts. “Why so long? You’re beautiful.”
Rachel laughed. “Oh sweetie, you have a few things to learn. To these guys a pretty girl is like a paper napkin. Use it and then toss it the f*ck out.”
My voice was grumpy. “I was raised around this shit. I know damn well how it works.”
“Then you know that just because man nails you doesn’t make him yours.”
“But Casper is yours?”
“He is now.”
I played with the ends of my wet hair, lowering my voice to a whisper. “So what will I be? To Orion?”
Rachel regarded me shrewdly. “I guess that depends on you, hon. Learn how to please the shit out of him. Give him what he can’t get somewhere else.”
This was beginning to sound like a less than appealing long term arrangement. But it might buy me some time. Rachel threw me another towel.
“I’ll be right back. Casper and I actually have a trailer parked a few hundred yards out. You seem about my size so I’ll head over grab you some things. Then I’ll fry you up a hamburger. You like hamburgers, right?”
“Sure. Thanks.” She started to leave when I called her back. I didn’t know how to put my question into words. “So, as far as Orion goes. I mean, he’s sort of a good guy, right?”
Rachel’s face grew thoughtful. “Sometimes,” she said carefully. Her answer didn’t make me feel much better.
I didn’t see Orion for the rest of the afternoon. Rachel fed me and clothed me and took me on a walk around Quartzsite. We visited a small drugstore where I was able to use the money Orion had given me to buy a few necessities. After that we came across a curious secondhand bookstore which was housed in a ramshackle building and overseen by an old man who didn’t wear clothes. Belatedly I noticed the ‘Nudist on the Premises’ signs. I bought a pile of books anyway, figuring they might be a worthy distraction from whatever the coming days had in store.
As Rachel and I returned to the Riverbottom the sun was beginning its slow descent. I lowered my head, feeling a tear escape.
“What’s wrong, hon?” Rachel circled an arm around me.
I managed to give her a weak smile. “I just wish it was yesterday, that’s all.”
Rachel nodded with sympathy and didn’t ask any further questions.
Inside the bar a group of men were gathered in a circle, Orion at the center. They all wore the identities of the Defiant. Orion noticed us walk in and he nodded, beckoning.
A row of shot glasses lined the bar. Each man took one as did Rachel. Orion placed one in my hand and I looked around uncertainly.
When Orion started to speak his voice was thick and mournful.
“I lost a brother today. Crest Tolleson was like my other half from the time I could walk. He was a hell of a man, a hell of a rider. And shit, even though we parted ways a decade ago, I’ll miss him every f*cking day.” Orion tipped his head back and swallowed the shot. I thought I saw tears in the corners of his eyes.
Everyone else seemed to take that as their cue to drink and so I did the same. A long moment of silence followed. My head was beginning to swim; from exhaustion, from the alcohol, from the stress and grief of my father’s murder. There would be no funeral. This was the only goodbye I would get.
Orion’s voice reached me clearly. “Rachel,” he ordered. “Put her to bed.”
Rachel led me back to the room which Orion had taken me to earlier. I guessed it belonged to him. As I did as well, I reminded myself. I let Rachel help me into a soft t-shirt and then sank onto the bed. For a long time I slept and it was, mercifully, dreamless.