“People don’t separate the Old and New Testament God,” Eden pipes in with a fire in her eyes. “It’s certain denominations of Christians that find the ramifications of sin uncomfortable, usually.”
Kennedy’s eyes narrow and she bites her bottom lip. “You’re probably right. I’ll find out at Christmas, though, since I’ll be going to both Fundamentalist and Episcopalian services while home.”
Bridgette’s eyes widen. “You’ll get in trouble.”
“No I won’t. The guidelines state that we must find an evangelical Bible-teaching church to attend while not on campus. I found one. It says nothing of attending additional services. Calm down, Bridge. I’m not going to come back dancing with a pentagram around my neck. I just want to compare the teachings of where I came from to where I am now. Kind of see where it all lines up.”
Seemingly placated, Bridgette takes a deep breath and flips to another page in her book.
I clear my throat, uncomfortable with being only a spectator in this discussion. Plus, I need to get out of my own head. “Wait up. You talked about God giving us free will. Choosing us to get the gift and not, say, a giraffe.” She nods, I continue. “And you say that free will ran wild in humans.”
“Most.”
Flicking my gaze around the table, I see the eyes of our friends grow wide as they watch the debate unfold.
“So, you’re suggesting God made a mistake?”
“What?” she naps. “No.”
“Then how do you explain free will running wild?”
She arches an eyebrow. “How do you explain free will at all?”
My mouth opens, but nothing comes out.
“See?” she continues. “He created this beautiful, awesome thing, that he knew would mean he had to let go of some of his control. His hope was that humans would learn to love him and surrender their free will to his. You know, your will, not mine be done. He knew it wouldn’t be perfect, but could he have imagined tens of thousands of people renouncing his name and worshiping golden calves?”
“He knew,” Jonah cuts in. “He knew how it would work out.”
Kennedy points at Jonah. “He knew that it would work out, but I challenge that he knew how. Everyone says that God ordains our steps, but sometimes our own free will can get in the way of it. He knew that was a possibility.”
“I’m pretty sure Satan fits in here somewhere,” Silas says.
“Yeah?” Kennedy asks. “How?”
Silas clears his throat. “When God created man with free will, Satan wasn’t yet in the picture. His existence complicates the operating system of free will. It’s a kink in the pipe, if you will. A blockage. If we were all hearing from God all the time, then it would be pretty easy to understand that we’re to turn our will over. Also, even when it is God testing us directly, we’d still have a clear and un-clogged heart with which to listen. But, with Satan in the picture, we get a lot of external noises and messages, and don’t know who to listen to.”
“When was Satan created, though?” Kennedy shifts in her seat. “Isn’t it supposed that he was behind the serpent in the garden?”
I pipe up, eager to share knowledge from some side reading on sin I’ve been doing. “It’s kind of understood that the serpent is Satan. But, he didn’t cause the sin in the garden. Eve listened to the lies, and her own desires took over and, well, here we are.”
“Where do those desires come from?” Bridgette asks. No one is studying OT anymore. Instead, we’re discussing it.
Eden shrugs. “Free will?”
“But if Satan was formerly an angel, or holy being, or whatever else, that God, assumably, created, how did he have desires in his own heart apart from God?” Kennedy runs a hand through her hair, and a light pink takes over her cheeks.
“Right,” Jonah enters excitedly. “If God created Satan, then he would have known the desires of his heart … just like he told Moses about Pharaoh’s heart.”
“So he just let it happen?” Silas asks, sounding as defeated as I’ve felt for the last year and a half.
He just let it happen.
Kennedy exhales, puffing out her cheeks. “Sovereignty? Is that what we’re hinging all of this on?” She shrugs. “Just … whatever? God doing what God does for reasons we don’t get to understand yet?”
“Wait,” Bridgette cuts in, eyeing Silas, then the rest of us. “This is about patience. Salvation. God didn’t send Satan to hell when he sinned. He sent him to earth.”
“To run amuck with us?” Eden questions.
Bridgette shakes her head. “No. I don’t think that was it. I think it was his second chance. He didn’t send him straight to hell. He doesn’t send anyone to hell. He gave Satan a chance at salvation even though Genesis three-fifteen says that his head would be crushed. I think God held out hope … that the will would turn Satan around.”
“I don’t know, Bridge,” Jonah speaks up. “That seems a little far-fetched. I mean, it all sounds good until you look at Genesis three-fifteen and realize it all worked out according to the plan.”
Bridgette shrugs, exhaling a long, light breath. “They didn’t have Jesus. We do. We don’t have to be held hostage by sin.”