“So…” He smiles, walking to the front of his desk and leaning against it. “What’s new with you, little shadow?”
The term of endearment strikes out like a lasso, wrapping around my middle and tugging, nostalgia clawing at my insides. It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell him. I’m seeing someone. You’d hate him.
But I don’t want to wade those waters yet, still want to keep James to myself before I introduce him to family.
I force a smile on my face, an ache settling heavy in my chest. “Just working at the coffee shop and settling into the new place. Did you look around yet?”
His face softens, his eyes warming the way they used to, and with that simple look, my insides turn to mush, all my anger and resentment being drowned by the hope that flows through me.
“Not yet, but you’ve done a nice job setting the place up,” he says.
I wave him off. “That was easy. Jon and I have just been trying to acclimate to the weather, to be honest. It’s so different than Florida.” Pausing, my fingers twist together, palms growing clammy because this is a nice moment, and the last thing I want to do is ruin it with questions and nagging. Still, the words flow from my mouth before I can stop them. “When are you gonna tell him?”
His hands rest in his pockets. “Tell him what?”
I roll my eyes to the ceiling, blowing out a breath. “You know what, Dad. Tell Jon about the fact you’re shipping him to boarding school.”
He shifts, his palm coming up to rub at his chin. “Wendy, it’s been five minutes since I’ve been home. I haven’t even seen him yet. I’ll tell him, don’t worry.”
“When?” I repeat.
“When what?”
Frustration boils in my veins, my anger rising like lava, the pressure building in the center of my chest until it explodes out of me like a geyser.
My fists clench at my sides. “When are you going to stop by for more than a single night?” I hiss. “When are you going to realize that your children are here?” My hand slaps my chest. “We’re right here, Dad. And you’re…” I wave my arm around the room. “Everywhere else. You and Tina Belle.”
“Wendy, I—”
I raise my palm. “Don’t. Please, just... don’t. I am so sick of placating words and empty promises. I am so tired of feeling like I’m failing Jon when it’s really you who is. That’s not fair to me, and you know it.” A knot lodges in my throat. “And I know you’re busy, I get that. But damnit, just be here, Dad. Like you used to.”
His nostrils flare as he straightens off his desk, walking slowly toward me.
I lean back against the wall, sliding until I’m on the floor, pressing my palms into my eye sockets to try and stem the burn. I’ve never spoken to him that way before.
Shoes come into my line of vision and my dad crouches at my side. “Little Shadow.” He sighs, slipping down next to me, his elbows resting on his knees. “I don’t know what you want me to say, Wendy.”
“Just say you’ll be here.” The words stick in my throat, the hole in my chest throbbing. “Say you’ll start to make us a priority.”
He’s quiet for long moments before his arm comes around my shoulders and brings me into his side. I bite my lip and swallow harshly to keep the sobs at bay. The last thing I want is to look weak in front of the man who’s always so strong.
“You’re the most important thing in the world to me,” he says.
“Doesn’t feel like it,” I mutter.
“You are. You always have been.”
“And Jon,” I add, irritation slicing through the haze of his attention.
“What?” His body tenses.
“You said I’m the most important thing in the world to you. But I’m not your only kid. You forgot to mention Jon.”
He clears his throat. “Right, of course. Jon too.”
“Sometimes,” I whisper, seizing my newfound confidence and running with it. “Sometimes it feels like you’ve forgotten we exist at all.”
There’s a tingling sensation on the top of my head as he presses a kiss to my hair, and I curl into him farther. “Please tell him,” I beg again. “I don’t want to be the one who does.”
He nods against me. “I’ll tell him in the morning.”
Blowing out a breath, I allow his words to wrap around me like a blanket, relief swallowing up the sadness—at least temporarily.
But in the morning, he’s gone. And Jon still doesn’t know.
18
James
Meeting with Peter put everything back in focus; his death so close I can smell it in the air. Now I just have to convince Ru that striking a business deal with him won’t work in our favor. I will be extremely irritated if my plans become more difficult because our business starts depending heavily on his.
Even if Peter’s days weren’t severely numbered, I would be wary of using him. Years of dreaming up ways to kill the man responsible for every trauma of your life gives you ample time to learn about his weaknesses. About his past. And I’ve learned more about Peter than even his closest confidantes. I know that he grew up in South Florida, his parents so poor they could barely afford the rice they put on the table. I know that he was a common drug pusher by the age of fourteen, running through the streets, going by the name of Pan, whispering ideas of grandeur in people’s ears. Promising a life of adventure if only they followed his lead. I know that while he rose to power slowly through the ranks, he left others behind. Most of whom ended up disappearing without a trace.
And I know that when he bought a failing airplane company, it was for pennies on the dollar, and somehow, the original owner was never heard from again.
I know Michaels is not his original last name. And I know the only thing he cares about in this world besides his money and his stature is his daughter.
Wendy.
But I can’t tell Ru all of that without admitting there is a huge piece of my life he’s never been privy to. And while Ru isn’t a nosy type of man, I can’t imagine he would take it well knowing that he’s allowed me into his fold, and I’ve kept the majority of myself a secret.
But I’ll deal with that tonight when I get back to the JR.
Right now, my focus is on a new bakery that opened on Maize Street. Normally, it’s the twins who make the rounds, collecting protection tax and the like, but after having issues with the new shop, I figured I’d pay them a personal visit.
Sighing, I sit down in the seat across from George, the owner, my stomach twisting with unease from the way flour sticks to all of the surfaces in the kitchen. I take out my gloves, the black leather encasing my hands in warmth, and I flex my fingers slowly as I speak. “Now… George.” I smile, crossing my foot on my opposite knee. “Tell me one more time what happened.”
George wipes his brow with a white towel, his potbelly expanding with each of his heavy breaths. “I told you, someone already came three days ago. I already paid.”
“Impossible,” I snap, irritation at this man’s blatant lies tearing up my insides. Taking in a deep breath, I lean my neck to the side, allowing the crack of my bones to settle my anger. “I do apologize,” I chuckle, closing my eyes. “I didn’t mean to lose my temper. It’s just… that’s impossible.”
He puts his hands up. “I’m telling you the truth.”
“I certainly hope so.” Uncrossing my legs, I pull out my knife, flipping it open and running my gloved thumb across the blade, reveling in the way the metal shines as it presses against the leather. “Tell me, do you know who I am?”
The man shakes his head no.
“Your neighbors didn’t mention me?” I press my free hand to my chest. “I’m hurt.”
“Listen, I told you what I know.” The man starts to stand up, throwing the towel over his shoulder. “There are customers ab—”
“Sit. Down,” I hiss.
The twins—who up until this point have been standing to the side—straighten and move closer. His eyes widen, but he plops back into the chair.
“Now, I’m a reasonable man. And I understand how upsetting it must be to learn that you were taken for a fool by some common beggar. I’m willing to overlook your mistake, since you didn’t know better.”
His shoulders slump. “So what, I’m just supposed to pay some bullshit twice?”
I tilt my head. “I said I was reasonable, not weak. And as much as I’d like to let it slide, you know how it goes.” I stand, rolling my eyes as I twirl my blade in the air. “If you do it for one, then you end up doing it for all. And honestly, if you’re good at something, you should never do it for free.” I stop when I’m standing in front of him, my blade sliding underneath his chin, tilting his head until his eyes meet mine. “And while our protection is courtesy, it is the best chance your business has at survival.”
His lips thin, beads of sweat trickling down his face. “And if I refuse?”
My hand presses the knife deeper into his skin. “We can find out if you’d like.”