Hometown Star

chapter Ten

Star woke up with a headache, the result of poor sleep. Her mother, who now worked for the O’Briens, had barely spoken to her before she’d left to help with breakfast, yet Star didn’t regret the words they’d exchanged. Destiny needed to grow up. She was fifty–two. If anything, Star should be the one sneaking guys into her room. Catching your mother in the act was unnatural—something no child should have to witness, no matter how old the child was.

Star stood under the shower. Hot water soothed her pounding head. She was so done with Alaska, and she’d be glad when Update This! finished with this segment and she could put this God forsaken state out of her life, with hope, forever.

Star spent the morning working on production logistics for Update This! At noon, she grabbed a quick bite to eat before heading over to visit Brandi, who was home now. She spent the rest of the afternoon entertaining Will while Brandi took a nap. Star half expected Destiny to show up but wasn’t surprised when her mother didn’t come by. Why would she when she could use her job at Cade’s as an excuse for staying away?

Still upset with her mom, Star didn’t go home until she was sure Destiny would be at the O’Briens serving dinner. When Star arrived at Patsy’s she found the driveway empty. She let herself in to the quiet mobile home and kicked off her heels.

Hungry, she cruised through the meager contents of the fridge: milk, eggs, cheddar cheese, bottled water, a half a bottle of white wine, and a six pack of diet cola.

Star’s stomach growled as she removed the eggs and cheese. An omelet was better than nothing.

The rattle of an engine pulled her around. Thinking it was too early for Destiny to be home, Star went to the door. Cade’s truck came up the driveway. She frowned. Terrific, what did he want—a repeat of last night’s kiss? No way. She was not her mother, ready and available for any guy that just happened to come along. A giant chip on her shoulder, Star met Cade at the door.

He came up the porch steps, a casserole dish in his hands. “Your mother sent you dinner. It’s chicken enchiladas.”

Surprised, Star took the warm dish from him. “Really?” Her bravado faded. “My mom isn’t the greatest cook, but she does make decent enchiladas. Thanks, I’m starving.”

Cade followed her inside. Star snagged a plate from the rack near the sink.

“She sent enough for two,” Cade said. “Mind if I join you?”

“You haven’t eaten yet?” Star asked. She took a second plate from the rack.

“I was going to, then your mother sent me here.” He smiled. “She’s not very subtle.”

Star shook her head. “No, she’s not. Have a seat.” She set the plates on the table. The spicy scent of chicken and chili sauce filled the air. “Diet soda or wine?” she offered. “That’s all I have.”

“Soda.” Cade sat.

Star returned with two cans of soda then took a seat. “You’re a lifesaver. I was just about to make myself a cheese omelet for dinner. Boring.”

Cade forked up some enchilada. “This is great.”

“Um hum,” Star agreed, her own mouth full.

They ate in companionable silence, and it seemed easy between them for once. No agenda. Just two hungry people enjoying a good meal.

“How’s Trudy?” Star asked between bites.

“Fine. Resting.” Cade chewed, his expression thoughtful. “Your mom’s doing a good job.”

“When do John and Ernie leave?” She had no desire to bear witness to another late night sex fest.

“Not until Saturday. They booked the full week.”

Star’s hopes sank. “That long, huh?”

“Why?” Cade asked. “Is there a problem?”

“No,” she said a bit too quickly. She wasn’t going to rat her mother out, no matter how much she disapproved of her actions.

Cade finished his enchilada and took a long drink of soda. “I’m stuffed.”

“Me, too.” She stood. “Let me wash the dish so you can take it back.”

“Sit down.” Cade gestured to her chair. “I don’t think your food’s even hit your stomach yet.”

“Oh.” Star lowered herself back onto the chair. “I thought you’d want to get home.”

“Why?” He leaned back, looking entirely too male to suit her.

“The kids? The guests?” she said, reminding him of his life.

“Ron’s covering for me.”

“I see.” He stared at her, the hungry look back in his eyes. Her mind screamed danger, yet she didn’t move.

“Any interest in seeing a movie? They’re showing Yours, Mine and Ours, the original, at the park tonight.”

“They still do that?” Star had loved the outdoor movies when she’d been a kid. They’d always gone. A free event was not something her family passed up.

“Every Sunday night during the summer.”

She looked hard at Cade, not sure how to take his invitation. “I don’t know.”

“It’s just a movie, Star,” he said, as if reading her mind. “In a public place.”

What could happen? “Okay, I’ll go. I’m a sucker for Lucille Ball.” This time when she stood, he didn’t protest. He rose, too, taking his own plate to the sink. Star washed the dishes, and Cade dried. Again, it was too easy between them, and more alarm bells sounded, but Star ignored the warnings and went to freshen up.

Quickly, she showered, dressing in jeans and a simple white T–shirt edged at the neck with pretty lace. She slid her feet into her turquoise flip flops with the monkeys on the soles, and grabbed a thick blue hooded sweatshirt. The nights here were cool, and she knew she’d need the jacket later.

She found Cade on the porch, sitting on the top step, the can of soda in his hands.

“That was fast,” he said when he saw her. Then, “You’re beautiful.”

The compliment heated her skin, and made it even harder for her to think about keeping him at arm’s length. “I feel better now that I don’t smell like baby spit up.”

“I’ll take you any way I can get you, Starlene White.”

Desire curled low in her belly. He was doing it again, seducing her with sweet words.

“Don’t, Cade,” she said, tamping down the confusion his compliment stirred. The way he looked at her, as if she were the only woman for him, made her want to give in to him, to the romance he promised, yet she couldn’t let go. Not with him. “Let’s just go to the movie, okay?”

* * *

It didn’t get dark in Seward until nearly daybreak this time of year, but that didn’t stop the town from showing the outdoor movie.

A covered area in the park was darkened on three sides with black cloth. The movie screen was inset and surprisingly easy to see, even in the muted daylight. Although they’d arrived about thirty minutes early, the lawn was already covered with several blankets and low riding lawn chairs.

“Is this a good spot?” Cade asked when they found a vacant patch of grass.

“Works for me,” Star replied.

Cade spread the blanket out on the grass. There was a good turnout tonight, probably around seventy people. Star recognized some of them: the gal from the diner, one of the nurses from the hospital, and a checker from the local store.

Cade knew everyone, and they’d stopped several times to greet people while making their way through the crowd. To Star’s surprise, a lot of people remembered her and a part of her liked that, liked being a part of a community. Her life in Seattle didn’t allow time for things like neighbors, and she certainly didn’t know anyone there from her childhood.

“Have a seat,” Cade said.

Star lowered herself to the blanket. “What do you have in that bag?”

Cade grinned as he dropped down beside her. He reached in the bag and pulled out a bottle of wine.

“Wine? Is that legal?”

“It is if you don’t get caught.” He smiled before fishing a bag of pre–popped popcorn from the sack.

“Popcorn?”

Next came a box of Milk Duds.

“Are you kidding?” Star asked. “Wine, popcorn, and Milk Duds are a strange combo. You brought a lot of snacks when you couldn’t be sure I’d agree to this.”

“A guy can always hope.” Cade’s smile deepened.

Star shook her head, unable to resist his charm.

“Besides,” Cade said, “you haven’t lived until you’ve had Milk Duds and popcorn mixed together. We need the wine to wash it all down.” He opened the box of candy and shook the contents into the bag of popcorn. “Try some.” He held the bag out to her.

Skeptical, Star tried a handful. The chocolate and caramel mixed with the salty popcorn. She smiled. “This is good. Like caramel corn.”

“Told you. It’s even better when the popcorn is hot.” Cade removed the cork from the wine and filled two clear plastic cups, passing one to Star. “Cheers.”

Star touched her glass to his. “Cheers.”

“Let’s drink to the first day of the rest of our lives.”

“Cheesy, O’Brien,” Star said. “But okay. To the rest of our lives.” They touched glasses again. Star took a sip of wine. “This is good, too.”

“Merlot. To go with the chocolate.”

Star smiled.

“How much longer are you in town?” He tossed a handful of popcorn into his mouth.

“One week. I leave next Sunday.”

Cade frowned. “Not long then.”

“Nope.” Star sipped her wine. “I wouldn’t stay on this long, but I promised Brandi I’d hang out for a while.” Star inhaled. The scented air overwhelmed her, the hemlock, the stink of the fish from the bay, and the wild fireweed. “I’m going to miss the air here.”

“Just the air?” Cade teased.

“And Brandi and Will,” she joked.

“Will you miss me, Star?” His serious tone caught her off guard.

“I think so,” she replied honestly. “If you’d asked me that question last week I would have said, no, but now you’re starting to grow on me a little. Plus, you made me this delicious popcorn. That will earn you some serious points in my book.”

He chuckled, his laugh breaking the serious moment.

People continued to arrive. Soon the lawn was totally covered with bright blankets. Whole families had come, and their laughter filled the park. Children played. Neighbors visited.

Star glanced at Cade and found him watching her. “We should have brought the kids.”

“Then it wouldn’t be a date.” Cade reclined, rolling to his side, propping his torso up on his elbow.

“It’s not a date.”

“If you say so.”

“I’m not used to you being nice to me,” she said. “I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

“The shoe’s not going to drop.” He took a sip of his wine and appeared to be considering her words. “I always wanted to be nice to you, even when I was awful. And later, when we were teenagers, I didn’t know how to fix all the things I’d done.”

“I guess I can understand where you were coming from, now that I know about Patsy and your dad. I’m sorry their relationship was so hard on you. I guess I don’t know how I would have reacted had I known about them.”

“I’m over it.”

“I know. Tell me about your wife,” she asked, wondering how much, if anything, he’d share with her. “What was she like?”

He sat back up. “That would depend on the day.”

“What do you mean?”

“Marissa was extremely bipolar. She was up. She was down. When she was up, life was great. When she was down, she was suicidal and needed constant supervision.”

“Wow, she sounds a lot like my mom,” Star said. “I’ve always thought my mom was bipolar, but when I suggested as much to her, she read me the riot act. I can’t imagine what you and the kids went through.”

Cade reached over and squeezed her hand. “I didn’t realize about Destiny.”

Star shrugged. “We survived her. Tell me more about Marissa.”

“Because of her illness, we’d agreed not to have any more children after Brad, but Marissa became pregnant with the twins.” Cade looked up at the sky, and Star knew the memories played in his head. “I always wanted a big family, lots of kids.

“Her illness was rough on all of us,” he said. “She hated it here. She wanted to live in the city, in Seattle or L.A. She begged me to take her out of this town, but my life was here and will always be here.”

“She died in a car accident, is that right?” Star prompted.

He nodded. “I’d finally talked her into getting some help. She was due to leave the following Monday for Seattle, but I don’t believe she ever had any intention of going. That day, she’d wanted to keep Brad home from school, but he wasn’t sick, so I made him go. The second I was gone, she loaded up the twins. The police said she didn’t even brake when she drove into the lake. She wanted to take the kids with her.” Remembered pain creased his forehead. “How can a mother do that, Star? I mean, her own kids?”

Star didn’t have an answer for him, but the agony in his voice twisted her own heart. “How did Finn and Emma get out of the car?”

“There was a witness to the accident. He dove in and pulled the kids out. Finn had a broken arm. Emma, some bruises. When he went back for Marissa, he couldn’t find her. They recovered her body later that afternoon. I’ve spent a lot of time beating myself up. I should have watched her better, but she seemed fine that day. In the end, I couldn’t have stopped her. She’d have found a way to take her own life.”

“And Brad?” Star asked. “How has the accident affected him?”

“He’s angry. He blames me for making him go to school. He thinks he could have stopped her if he’d been with her that day. And maybe he could have, I don’t know. I’ve tried to explain to Brad about Marissa’s mental condition, and I think he understands now, but she broke his heart.”

“That’s awful. Her story is so tragic.”

“The kids suffered the most,” Cade said. “They’ve had extensive counseling. Finn recently quit having nightmares. Emma handled it better; I’m not sure why. It was a blessing when Ron and Trudy moved in with us. Trudy especially. The kids need a woman in their lives.”

Overcome with compassion, Star placed her hand over Cade’s. His hand shifted and he laced his fingers with hers, holding on, as if she were some kind of lifeline for him, and something inside Star softened.

“I don’t want to talk about Marissa anymore.” His attention focused totally on Star.

“Me either.”

His fingers tightened around hers, and a bond formed between them. He’d trusted her with his past, and that trust honored her, made her want to smooth away all his hurts, all the pain he’d endured.

The movie began. Music filled the air, the happy notes chasing away the melancholy silence between them.

“Popcorn?” Cade asked as he came back to a sitting position on the blanket.

“Yes, please.”

They watched the movie, munched popcorn, drank wine, and most importantly, they laughed, the laughter chasing away the ghosts of their pasts.

When the movie ended, they stayed where they were, mellow and sated, in no hurry to leave. All around them, people packed up their blankets and left.

For the first time in her life, Star didn’t want the day to end. She knew she’d stay up all night with Cade if he wanted her to. She didn’t want to break this new connection between them.

Cade moved to his back, his hands cradled under his head.

Star copied him. The sky was not quite blue and not quite white, but more lavender. A twilight sky.

Cade turned his head to look at her. Star did the same. Their faces only inches apart.

“I had a good time tonight,” Star said.

“I don’t want to take you home yet.”

“Okay.”

Cade stroked her cheek. “You’ve always been the prettiest girl in Seward.” His fingers trailed over her jaw, to her neck. “I always hoped you’d come back. I wanted the chance to set things right with you.”

His words made her tingle—all over, and heaven help her, she liked the sensation.

Cade’s fingers moved through her hair, lifting the strands then letting them fall. On their sides, they faced each other now. Star could barely think with him so close. She loved his mouth, the sensuous curve of his upper lip. He had great lips. Strong lips. She wanted him to kiss her. She didn’t care if they were in the middle of a public park. What did it matter? She wasn’t staying on. She had nothing to lose except her pride, and who would know once she was back in Seattle?

Cade’s lips parted slightly.

Unable to resist, she kissed him.

He moaned, low, the sound better than any words would have been. She may have started the kiss, but Cade took over, taking Star onto her back. His mouth worked magic on hers. She forgot everything but him. If this was a dream she never wanted to wake up.

The kiss went on and on, sending Star deeper and deeper into a state of arousal she’d never experienced before. Her body grew weightless and heavy at the same time. His hands slipped inside her sweatshirt jacket, under her T–shirt, to her back. His rough palms stroked her sensitive skin.

“We need to get out of here,” Cade whispered in her ear. “Now, or I’m going to make love to you here. In public.”

The words hit her like ice water. Star’s eyes snapped open. Good grief, she was just like her mother—wanton to the core! Quickly, she scanned the area. Only one other couple remained, and they were involved in their own necking.

Embarrassed, Star sat up and pulled her T–shirt back down into place.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I don’t know what happened.”

Cade sat up, then gave her a cocky smile. “You don’t know what happened?”

Star pursed her lips. “I know what happened; I just don’t know why I let it.”

“Some things you just can’t control.” Cade touched her face, gently, sweetly.

On the verge of kissing him again, Star pushed to her knees. “We should go.”

He reached for her again, the predatory glow back in his eyes.

“No, I mean it.” She stood. She might be prone to sex thanks to her mother, but she didn’t need to perform in public.

Cade sighed, obviously disappointed. Without looking at her, he packed up the bag, stuffing the blanket inside.

Star moved away. She’d never suspected she could lose control like that and the knowledge unsettled her. She loved control, fed on it. She needed time to think, to sort out these new, strong feelings.

“I don’t suppose you want to take this back to your place?” Cade asked, sounding hopeful.

“I’m sure my mom’s there,” she hedged, more afraid to confront her own sexuality than she wanted to admit.

“Then let’s go somewhere else.”

She couldn’t look at him. “I can’t.”

“Why?”

She knew he didn’t understand, but she had no intention of telling him she was a frightened virgin. And she wasn’t just scared of the sex, or of her own powerful reaction to him. She was afraid Cade would break her heart.

“Don’t run away, Star,” Cade said. “Take a chance.”

“I can’t. Not yet.” Regret heavy in her chest, Star walked away. When she reached his truck, she got inside. Cade didn’t speak on the ride back to Patsy’s. Relief filled her when she saw Brandi’s car in the driveway. Her mother was home.

Star opened the door of the truck. “Thanks for tonight.”

“Star.”

Star jumped from the truck. She didn’t want to hear what he had to say, couldn’t take any more pressure from him.

Cade had given her a taste of sex tonight.

Heaven help her, she wanted more.

At the door, Star twisted the knob. At the same time her mother yanked the door open from the inside.

“Star,” Destiny cried. “Come quick. I think I’ve killed John.”