I stared at my outpatient care nurse, a little dazed. I’d been feeling that way since I left the apartment for the first time escorted by Caine, Arnie, and Sly. “I took the Keflex as prescribed,” I murmured.
“Good. Now that the staples are out, try not to forget about the injury. You’ve still got a minimum two weeks of healing to do.”
“I don’t think I’ll be forgetting this anytime soon.”
She gave me a sympathetic smile. “I don’t suppose you will. Have they found the guy yet?”
“Nope.” I stood up and Liz steadied me. “I’m ready to just get on with my life, you know, but with this hanging around my neck …”
She squeezed my arm. “I hope they get him soon, hon.”
I smiled gratefully and she walked me out into the waiting room, where Caine stood talking quietly into his phone while Arnie and Sly stood by the doors. Their real names were Griff and Don, but they answered with good humor to the nicknames I’d given them.
Caine saw us and quickly ended his conversation. He slipped his phone into his pocket and strode over to us. He homed in on Liz. “Everything’s okay?”
“Staples are out. No infection. Lexie’s on the road to recovery.”
“Great.” I gave him a pointed look. “Now I can go home.”
He frowned. “If by ‘home’ you mean my home, then yes, you can go home.”
“Caine—”
“No argument.” He slipped his arm around my waist, thanked Liz, and started to walk me out.
I glanced over my shoulder to give Liz a grateful smile. The whole time I tried to ignore Caine’s body pressed up against mine. I could manage walking by myself just fine, but I didn’t want to cause a scene in the hospital by telling him to back off.
After he’d disappeared last night, Effie helped me upstairs and into bed. No words were needed. I think even this time she was pissed at Caine and understood I’d reached the end of my fight on this one. When I heard him return from his drive a while later, I half hoped he’d come to my room. To say what? I didn’t know. Something. Anything. However, he didn’t, and that was when I decided it was time for me to finally let him go. I lay in bed that night thinking of all the things I needed to sort out in my life that didn’t revolve around Caine.
Solving my career crisis seemed like the place to start. Antoine’s sister, Renée, had been in contact and had given me these two weeks to mull over her offer before she offered it to someone else. Antoine had e-mailed me a few times over the last fourteen days, each e-mail pontificating on the delights and benefits of living in Paris. I had to admit for the last week I’d made it all up my mind that if I could get Caine to confide in me, then I’d stay in Boston. That would have meant looking around the city for a new job anyway, because there was no way I was continuing on as his PA if we were going to be in a serious relationship.
Now, however, I found myself considering Renée’s offer.
Before I even thought about Paris, though, I had to deal with my father. There were too many unresolved issues there. I could not get it out of my head that I would even contemplate that he would hurt me. Yet the thought that the person behind my attack might be him had flittered through my mind, however briefly. Of course upon reflection I was a little horrified with myself for even thinking it. In fact, it more than horrified me—it startled me into realizing that I was never going to get a fresh start anywhere until I found some kind of closure with my father. I had to talk to him, and hoped to God when I did he could make me understand his actions better. If he could, then I might be able to forgive my mother for choosing him over me. After all, the hurt my mother’s choices had inflicted on me were at the core of my issues. How could I let go and move on in Paris if I didn’t come to terms with that hurt, that rejection? I wouldn’t. I’d just take it with me.
“You’re quiet. Are you in pain?” Caine asked as we settled into the car.
“It’s a little tender but I’m okay. I really wish you’d let me go back to my own apartment, though.”
He sighed. “Not until your attacker is found.”
“And if we don’t find him?”
“We’ll cross that bridge when we get there.”
“I’m warning you it’ll be a wooden rope bridge riddled with dry rot with a big sign that says ‘Cross at your own risk.’ ”
Caine didn’t say anything. I looked at him. He was staring out of his passenger window, wearing the ghost of an amused smile.
It was on the tip of my tongue to say, “You’re going to miss my smart ass.” But I knew his answer—or more likely nonanswer—would sting worse than the staples I’d just had removed.
We traveled back to Caine’s apartment in silence. Arnie and Sly walked us up to his apartment and left once I was safely ensconced inside. I was sick of the security. The lack of any leads on my attacker made me suspect I’d been stabbed by some random psycho on the street. The security and lock-down in the apartment felt like overkill.
“I have to get back to work, but Effie will be over soon,” Caine said.
“Effie doesn’t need to be here anymore.” I kicked off my shoes, holding a hand up to stop Caine coming toward me to help. “I can get around on my own now. I’m sure she has better things to do than help you keep me prisoner.”
“It’s just for a little while longer, Lexie.”
“How would you feel?” I scowled, leaning against the wall for support. “Wouldn’t this be killing you?”
Instead of answering—not that he needed to, because I knew it would be killing him—Caine reminded me to call if I needed him and then he was gone.
I didn’t call him, because I was determined to never need the handsome son of a bitch ever again.
Perhaps in my frustration I moved around the apartment that night more than I should have. Now that I was resolute in my decision to go see my father before accepting Renée’s offer, I wanted to do it as soon as I could. The choice was made and I wanted to start living by it, for many reasons, including the fact that it distracted me from thinking about leaving Caine behind for good. Anytime I let myself dwell on the idea of not getting to see him every day, dread and utter desolation crept over me.