Despite the winter month, the temperature outside wasn’t frigid, though it’d drop when night fell.
“Did you ever love anyone?” It was something I’d never thought to ask my uncle, something I’d never stopped to think about. “I mean, other than me. A significant other kind of love?”
Uncle Gregor smiled. “I did. It was remarkable, too. The kind you never forget.”
My startled gaze found his profile. “Where is she? Why didn’t it last?”
He sighed. “It wasn’t a she, Hawthorne. It was a him.”
I stared, his words and their implication sinking deep. “What?” My hand tightened in his. “Why didn’t I know this? Why didn’t you tell me?”
His smile was somewhere between sad and content. “Life happens. I guess I was worried about what my relationship would have done to you at the time. You were so little when your parents left, so young to be surrounded by the stigma their abandonment caused you. I didn’t want to add to that. By the time I realized I was wrong, that I was being selfish, I’d lost him.”
I gasped. “He found another partner?”
Gregor shrugged. “Maybe. He’d left the country for work, and it was impossible to follow him. I was tied up in court finishing up the paperwork for legal guardianship of you. You needed me, Hawthorne. I don’t regret the decision to stay.”
“Court?” I whispered.
He glanced at me. “There’s something you need to know. It’s time, and this is the perfect place to say it.” He took a shuddering breath. “Your parents planned to leave. I knew they were going. I figured it was easier on you believing that they’d just up and left one day rather than knowing they knew they wanted out. They decided to sign away their rights, and I went through the adoption process. Legally, you’re mine, Hawthorne. You’ve been mine for a long time.”
A lump formed in my throat, a tear sliding down my cheek. I wasn’t sure which was worse. Being abandoned or having my parents plan to abandon me. They hadn’t just left on a whim, they’d put a six-year-old child up for adoption. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
He studied my face. “Because everyone needs hope. At the time, I thought it was better for you to hope your parents would return than to hate us all. Because if you knew they’d planned to leave, then you’d realize that they never planned to return.” He blinked, and for the first time, I noticed the moisture in his eyes. “What you’ve got to remember, Hawthorne, is that despite what your parents did, there was someone who wanted you.”
The tears came fast and hard now, my chest heaving with the force. He hadn’t just wanted me, he’d sacrificed everything to keep me. Me.
It was in that moment I realized something. No matter how small the family, the love we shared was bigger than the lack of people in our home. Love built on sand is shaky, but love built on rocky shores can endure the strongest of storms.
“Do something for me,” I whispered. “Quit fighting. It’s okay to let go now. It’s okay to rest. For my sake.”
It was the hardest thing I’d ever had to say.
Chapter 8
It was Friday night, and I’d just climbed into Heathcliff’s pickup truck, my hands reaching for his familiar blue jean work jacket when he leaned over the seat and asked, “What’s your all-time favorite memory?”
My eyes came up to meet his in the dimming light. “Why?”
He shrugged. “Because the best nights should always begin with happy thoughts, and I figure you need those after the last two days.”
I stared, my pulse quickening. “You’ve given this some thought.”
He gripped the steering wheel, his eyes on the rearview mirror as he backed up and turned to pull out of the drive. “What? You couldn’t possibly be on my mind.” He glanced at me and winked. “You know, I think one of my all-time favorite memories is kissing you in a pile of hay.”