Chapter Three
* * *
UNABLE TO RESIST him, Gemma slipped her arm through Travis’s and let him lead her out of the VIP room. She made sure to keep her head down, aware of several camera flashes.
“Is it me you’re ashamed to be seen with, or are you afraid of what people back in Rock Canyon will say?” Travis asked.
Gemma peeked up at him. “I just don’t like people poking their noses in my business, wherever they may be.”
Travis was quiet for several beats. “It’s my life, Gemma; people taking pictures of me, selling them to magazines, writing gossip. It pretty much goes with the gig.”
Gemma didn’t respond right away. She understood the situation and didn’t hold it against him. But Rock Canyon thrived on gossip, and for years she’d been the focus of a lot of it. It had taken a while, but people had finally stopped looking at her with whispers and head shakes of disapproval. She’d created a place in her community that had nothing to do with being a teen mom and everything to do with organizing fund-raisers, helping out people in need, and just being who she’d always been.
The people of Rock Canyon used to call her a nice girl who’d made a mistake, but Charlie wasn’t a mistake. There had been rumors and speculation for years about whether Charlie was Travis’s or not. She had never confirmed it, but it was pretty damned obvious. Besides, she hadn’t been seeing anyone else.
But if people in Rock Canyon saw the pictures of she and Travis together now, it would be just a matter of time before someone desperate for money—or just being an idiot—tipped off the press about the possibility of Charlie’s paternity. And then their lives would be overrun by reporters, and Charlie would be thrust into a three-ring circus. All her sacrifices would have been for nothing.
“It’s just that your life is so globally public. It’s bad enough having small-town busybodies monitoring your every move, but when the world knows who you’re with, what you’re doing . . . I don’t think I could ever live like that,” Gemma said as they walked past Gerald the doorman again.
Or subject my son to it.
Travis stopped and held out his hand. “Hey, Gerald. I just wanted to say how much I appreciate your professionalism. What’s your last name?”
Gerald took Travis’s hand hesitantly before pumping it hard, his voice filled with excitement. “Thank you so much, Mr. Bowers. It’s Washington. My wife and I are big fans.”
“And I appreciate it,” he said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a card. “This is my publicist’s number. You tell her your name, and she’ll get you front-row tickets the next time I pass through Vegas, plus a couple of backstage passes.”
Gerald’s brown eyes were wider than the Grand Canyon and he started stammering. “But . . . Mr. Bowers, I was . . . just doing . . . my job.”
“No arguments, Gerald. I’ll see ya soon.”
As they walked away from the grinning man, Gemma had a hard time keeping the warm, fuzzy feelings at bay. “That was lovely of you.”
“That guy deserves it. Any other man would have had his camera phone out or be begging me for an autograph,” Travis said as they walked through the lobby toward the elevator.
“Well, I think it was wonderful,” she said, hoping she didn’t sound as gushy as she felt.
“Thank you,” Travis said, smiling.
“You’re welcome,” she said, fighting the urge to reach up and brush back his hair. It was something she had always done, and now it seemed unnatural not to.
Travis said nothing, just kept watching her with that mischievous grin.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” she asked.
“Like what?”
“I don’t know, but it’s unnerving.”
“Sorry I’m unnerving you,” he said, not sounding sorry about anything. Suddenly, he took her hand and tugged her away from the elevators just as one was about to open.
“What are you doing?”
“I want to show you something,” he said, taking her down a long hallway and through a pair of golden doors. The green uniforms and gold everywhere made Gemma chuckle a little, especially when they passed another fountain with a gold pot in the middle, lights shining into the water, making it look almost like arching rainbows. The O’Shea Hotel really played up their Irish theme, but it was beautifully done. She hardly had time to admire it before Travis was stopping in front of another, smaller elevator. Gemma frowned.
“Where are you taking me?”
The doors dinged, and Travis tried to pull her in without answering, but she held her ground. “Uh-uh. I’m not going anywhere until you tell me where this elevator goes.”
“To the roof,” he said, his eyes twinkling as he raised an eyebrow. “What, are you scared?”
“No, of course not, I just have things to do, and I don’t have time to go gallivanting around—”
“I promise to have you back to your room in time to finish at least two novels today,” he said, holding out his hand. “Come on. I dare you.”
A thousand reasons rushed through her mind, and at least half of those involved Charlie, but she found herself grabbing his hand anyway and letting him pull her inside.
THE DOORS OPENED, revealing a lush greenhouse-style garden, and Travis watched Gemma’s face break into wide-eyed delight.
“Oh!”
She walked out onto the stone floor, and he followed behind to the sound of rushing water on their left. Very few people visited this place, but Callum O’Shea knew Travis liked the peace of the garden.
Gemma clapped her hands and laughed, her eyes bright as she looked at him. “This is amazing! Thank you.”
As she walked along the path in front of him, he realized she was the first woman with whom he’d shared this place. When Callum had first shown him the garden, he’d come up here to write songs and escape the constant hangers-on, but he had never used it to soften a woman’s feelings toward him. It wasn’t like he was trying to get her back, at least not consciously, but he also didn’t want their time together to end.
The realization was startling. He wasn’t the type of guy to fall hard for a girl, at least not since Gemma. He knew his memory of how things had been between them was clouding his rationality, and despite her prickliness about Phoenix, he still found himself enchanted by her.
What did that mean, though? Did he want her to forgive him so she would give him another chance? She had already mentioned half a dozen times that she was uncomfortable with his public life, but could they make something work? Some compromise?
It wasn’t just nostalgia, though. He had been with women—probably more than he should have—but the heat had faded every time. Watching Gemma bend down to smell a pink flower, her hair drifting over her cheek and her eyes closing blissfully, was hotter than all those tight-Wranglered gold diggers combined.
Coming up alongside her, he picked the flower, ignoring her protests. “Travis, you can’t do that!”
“Who’s gonna stop me?” he teased, looking around the garden to drive his point home. Smoothing back her long bangs, he slipped the flower behind her ear.
“Beautiful.”
Gemma’s cheeks were flushed, and when she raised her eyes to his, they were shiny with tears. “I wish you wouldn’t do that.”
“Do what?”
“Use your charm on me,” she said, wiping at her eyes with a laugh. “You’ve always been able to get around me with it.”
“It’s never been charm with you, Gem,” he said, tenderly using her nickname as he brushed his fingers along her cheek. He felt her shaking and slid his finger under her chin, tipping up her face until their gazes locked. “I’m really sorry about the way things ended, Gemma. I never stopped thinking about you. But I didn’t know how to make you believe me, and part of me was angry that you didn’t trust me.”
She pulled away from him, her eyes narrowed with temper. “Before we started dating, you’d been out with half the girls in school, and don’t tell me you never dated two at the same time. I’m sorry I didn’t give you the benefit of the doubt, but honestly, can you really blame me?”
He fought down the frustration and anger her words brought rearing to the surface and said, “We were friends for two years and dated for four months. In all that time, did I ever hurt you, Gem?”
She said nothing for a few minutes, wiping away the tears on her cheeks. Finally, she breathed a soft, “No.”
“No, because I would never hurt you, Gem. Not for anything.”
He reached out for her hand and squeezed it. “Can you believe me now, Gem? Can you forgive me, so maybe we can have a do over?”
He was relieved when she didn’t pull away, but her answer was a little disheartening. “I don’t know.”
What are you so afraid of?
He could tell she was afraid, holding back a part of herself, and bit back a sharp response. Patience had never been his strong suit, but voicing his frustrations to her wasn’t going to open her up either. Gemma had always fought against people pressuring her, and he figured she most likely hadn’t changed in that regard.
When she cleared her throat and gently pulled away, he let her go.
“Come on. I want to explore.”
He let her walk away from him but followed behind closely, noting the way her shoulders tensed when his arm brushed hers. She might not like his lifestyle or believe in his innocence, but she wasn’t immune to him either.
GEMMA TRIED TO keep her focus on the beautiful scenery and off the warring guilt and panic rumbling inside her. For a second, when Travis had called her out on trusting him, part of her had wanted to believe him so badly she’d almost apologized. But if she forgave him now, what would that mean for Charlie? If she believed Travis about Phoenix, then walking away from him would have been a mistake, and everything she had done to protect Charlie since would have been for naught.
What if. Those two words were making her crazy. So crazy that, when she’d looked up into Travis’s eyes as he’d apologized and told her he would never hurt her, she’d almost stood on her tiptoes and kissed him.
Which was certifiable, no matter what old feelings she’d been fighting all day. If she kissed Travis, that was it. It would be wrong to be so intimate with him and not tell him something so personal.
Maybe not, though, if it’s just a one-time thing. You know what they say about Vegas . . .
They walked along the stone path, and Gemma had to admit she’d been thinking about sex a lot lately. It was hard to date in Rock Canyon; the minute something started to get serious, people started to talk. And while people were talking, she had Charlie to think about, and the things people said about her to him. She still remembered when she’d gone out with Marcus Boatman and all of Charlie’s teammates had given him hell because his mom was dating the coach. It had been only one date, and Gemma had been fine with that. The man hadn’t changed at all since high school.
Travis walked ahead of her over a stone tunnel bridge, and she felt a cool mist as she came behind him. To their right, a large hole had been cut in the stone wall of the tunnel, revealing a waterfall that disappeared into the stream below. She stopped in front of it, reaching out to touch the rushing water as it forced its way through her fingers.
Travis’s shoulder brushed hers and she said, “I never get tired of the sound of water.”
“I remember. Every rainstorm, you’d sit by the window and watch.” His mouth was near her ear, teasing away the strands of her hair.
“I still do that . . . . Ch—” She shut her mouth in alarm, cursing herself for almost mentioning Charlie.
“What? What were you going to say?”
His warm whisper blew across the skin of her throat, and her heartbeat picked up speed.
I need to get away from him before I do something stupid.
But as she turned to tell him they should go, she was startled to realize how close his mouth actually was. Licking her lips, she watched his eyes drop down and his head bend farther.
He’s going to kiss me.
And she wanted to let him.
Travis’s forehead dropped against hers. Her lips were only a hairsbreadth away from his, and she almost closed the distance. It had been so long since she’d been touched, and besides the few terrible kisses she’d had over the last ten years, she hadn’t been with anyone since . . .
Well, since Travis.
He moved closer, the warmth of his breath fanning across her lips, and she started to close her eyes, but Charlie’s face popped up in her mind, smiling with such wild abandon that it broke the spell.
“We should go,” she whispered, turning her head to the side.
Travis stopped, and the breath he took was so ragged and raw that her lower stomach twisted with desire.
“Okay,” he said, turning away from her to walk out of the tunnel and she groaned with disappointment.
She came up behind him just as the elevator doors opened and they stepped inside, neither saying anything on the ride down. When they reached the bottom floor again, she tried to let him off the hook. “You don’t have to go with me. I can find my way back to the elevators.”
He looked insulted. “I always walk my dates up to their door. It’s just good manners.”
“But this wasn’t a date—”
“What would you call it?” he asked, his eyebrow hiking.
Gemma shut her mouth and didn’t argue again. It did have all the earmarks of a date, down to the near kiss and awkward moments. That hadn’t been the plan when she’d accepted his lunch invitation.
What had she been expecting? She’d been curious, especially after his apology, and had wanted to find out just how different he was now from the boy she had loved. And she’d wanted to make sure she’d made the right decision by not telling him about Charlie ten years ago.
He’s happy. If I’d given him the option, he wouldn’t have all of his fame and fortune.
As they approached the main elevator, she blurted out, “You’re happy, right? I mean, with your life and everything? You wouldn’t have done anything differently?”
The elevator doors opened and they let people come off before getting on and telling the attendant the floor number. When Travis finally answered, it was with a wide smile.
“Yeah, sure I’m happy. I get to make a living doing what I love. I get to travel and meet new people. It’s what I always wanted.”
Gemma had no idea what she’d wanted or expected him to say, but his answer definitely irked her. Maybe it was the meet new people comment that made her think of all the girls they’d passed in the last few hours, snapping his picture and undressing him with their eyes.
“Good. I’m glad.”
Stepping off of the elevator when the doors opened, she hurried down the hallway without waiting for him. He followed behind her anyway, and leaned against the wall next to her room door as she searched for her key.
“Any chance I can get you to change your plans for tonight?”
She hesitated. “No. I’m going to relax for a while and then, later, I have the Kiss Awards ceremony to attend.”
“What’s that?” He was still lounging, relaxed.
She inserted the key into the lock and opened the door, walking a little way in and setting down her purse, only to turn back and find he had stepped in, too. Trying to calm the quivering in her stomach at having him in her hotel room, only a few feet from the bed, she said, “It’s for romance authors. It’s like the Country Music Awards for you.”
“What if I asked you to be my date tonight?” His gaze was searching, watching for a reaction from her.
“For what?” Should she close the door? Probably not, just in case he got the wrong idea.
Like maybe I want to throw him on the bed and have a casual one-off? Yeah, ’cause that would be a good idea.
“I have a charity event to go to tonight and I want you to be my plus one.”
“I don’t know,” she said, thinking about all of the press that would be waiting to take pictures.
But after all the camera phones going off today, there are probably already a hundred pictures of me currently being Tweeted, so what does it matter?
Unless someone in Rock Canyon saw them and recognized her. Then it mattered . . . a lot.
“It’s going to be very boring, but if you’re there, I’ll have an excuse to sneak out early. We could go dancing or gambling, or just take a drive.” He reached out and took her hand, threading his long fingers through hers. “What do you think, Gemma?”
“I . . . the awards are supposed to be pretty fun,” she said again weakly. Yes, she had been looking forward to them, but deep down, she wanted to spend the evening with Travis more, despite all the reasons she shouldn’t.
His lopsided grin was disbelieving. “You would rather go to a boring awards ceremony alone than go to a boring charity event with me?”
“I don’t have anything appropriate to wear,” she blurted out, hoping that would seal the deal. “All I have is this black cocktail dress, but I’ve seen pictures of those charity events, and everyone walks around in Armani and Vera Wang. I would look so out of place and embarrass you.”
“You could show up in a garbage bag and still be beautiful. It doesn’t matter what you wear, at least not to me,” he said, and the romance of his words would have made any red blooded American woman melt. “If you’re worried about fitting in, though, I could put in a call downstairs; there’s a dress shop and salon in the hotel, and I’m sure it wouldn’t be too much trouble to squeeze you in.”
Gemma was almost speechless at his high-handedness. “Travis, I can’t afford all that.”
“It would be on me. Since you’d really be saving me by going,” he said.
“I can’t accept that. I’m sure whatever they have is way overpriced and . . .”
Squeezing her hand firmly, he said, “Please, Gemma. I really want to spend the evening with you, but I already committed to this thing. You wouldn’t make me go alone, would you? I’ll be forced to talk to a bunch of stuffy people in penguin suits, and I’ll be so lonely.” His lip protruded as he made puppy-dog eyes at her.
“I’m sure you wouldn’t be lonely long,” she grumbled.
With a laugh, he snaked out an arm, wrapping it around her waist. She was so surprised, she didn’t even resist as he pulled her against him. “Come on, it’ll be just like prom. You were my savior then, and you’ll be my savior now, too.”
Pursing her lips, she said, “Well, when you put it that way, it seems like I don’t have any choice.”
“That’s my girl,” he teased, his blue eyes twinkling with laughter. But under all that, she saw it: the spark. It was like a roaring fire on a cold night that made you want to get closer, and right now, with Travis’s body pressed against hers, she wanted that heat.
What would it feel like to be Travis’s girl again? To pretend, if only for tonight, that they could be together?
I’m losing my mind.
So what if he didn’t really mess around in Phoenix? The longer Gemma hung with him, the harder it would be not to mention Charlie.
And then I’ll have to pick up the pieces when Travis breaks Charlie’s heart.
Despite the warning voice, Gemma wasn’t really thinking of Travis in a forever kind of way. As of this minute, she was just thinking it had been a very lonely, long dry spell, and her body was humming with need. Especially when he was leaning so close, his hair falling forward in such a messy way that she wanted to smooth back his curls and run her fingers through them.
She’d been quiet for too long, and Travis’s expression had changed from cheerful teasing to concern. “If you really don’t want to—”
“No!” she cried, her cheeks burning. “It’s just, well, things are complicated, and I’m not sure this would be a good idea.”
His mouth twisted into a grim line. “This is about Phoenix, isn’t it? Gemma, I told you over and over that nothing happened. I need you to believe that.”
No, it wasn’t just Phoenix. She wanted to go with him, but at the end of the night, it would be one more secret. A secret she’d have to keep from Charlie and her friends. Her stomach hurt just thinking about it; she’d never lied to Charlie, even when he’d started asking about Travis. She had told him everything, including why she hadn’t told Travis about her pregnancy, and Charlie had been accepting but disappointed.
If he knew she’d spent almost an entire day with Travis and never said anything about him, Charlie would never forgive her.
Even if I refuse to go, I could have told him about Charlie anytime today. If Charlie finds out, that’s all he’s going to think about, so what does it matter if I stop seeing Travis now? Why can’t I grab onto this weekend with both hands and do something for me? What’s that old saying, in for a penny, in for a pound? The damage is already done.
Suddenly, he was right in front of her, tipping back her head so their gazes locked. “Can we move past this and just have fun? No recriminations? Just two people having a good time?”
No? Maybe? There were a thousand answers she could give, but Gemma surprised herself by whispering, “Yes.”
“Good.”
He kissed her forehead, brushing his lips softly against her skin. Her body shivered as shock waves rippled through her, and she wrapped her arms around his waist, sinking into him. His hands splayed against her back and his head dipped lower, his warm breath against her mouth.
When his lips touched hers, it was like Doc and the DeLorean had snatched her back to high school. Travis’s mouth was soft, coaxing, and she melted against him, fully understanding the “quivering limbs” she’d been reading about in her romance novels. As he deepened the kiss, she realized that it wasn’t the same. Kissing Travis before had been about falling in love for the first time, hesitant, sweet, and searching. This kiss was about longing.
Suddenly, he broke the embrace, and she realized she had been making out with Travis in the middle of her hotel room with the door wide open. He closed the door, and second thoughts jumped to the forefront of her brain. She opened her mouth to stop him before things went any farther, but when he faced her again, his eyes hotly boring into hers, she couldn’t.
She’d been a good mother and put Charlie’s well-being and happiness before everything else, but just this one time, she wanted to be a little selfish. She wanted to get lost in Travis again, to see if he was everything she remembered.
Travis walked back to her and she stopped thinking, pushing everything but the moment from her brain. Gemma wrapped her arms around his shoulders and let him push her back into the room as his lips reclaimed hers. The sound of their mouths meeting and heavy breathing filled the room as they stumbled toward the bed, boots and wedges scattering behind them. Her eyes opened briefly as Travis pulled away to take off his shirt and toss it across the room.
She swallowed hard. Travis had always been tall with lean muscle, but as she looked at his wide chest trimming down into some very impressive abs, he seemed so big, so powerful, and it was a heady feeling that he was all hers, at least for now. Her hand reached out to run across the surface of his stomach, admiring the bumps and ridges, and she flattened her palm, smoothing it back up and over his chest, the soft brush of his chest hair tickling her palm. Her gaze slid back up to meet his, and his eyes were nearly black in the afternoon light, telling her without words that he loved her touch.
Suddenly, Travis pulled her to him, reaching for the bottom of her shirt, and she sucked in a breath as the cool air of the hotel room swept over her torso, her nipples tightening against the cups of her bra. His hand tangled in her hair as his mouth covered hers, and she slid her arms around his waist, running her nails up his back, taking his moan into her mouth. His other hand skimmed her side and slipped into the back of her denim skirt, and she wanted to be closer, wanted his hands on her bare skin everywhere. Standing on her tiptoes, she rubbed her breasts back and forth, the friction making her throb, and she lifted her leg to hook around his waist, trying to ease the pulse between her thighs. Her skirt rode up, and the only thing left between them was the roughness of his jeans and the thin cotton of her panties.
His hand grasped her thigh and brought their bodies closer, but the way her skirt bunched was painful. “One sec.”
He let go of her leg, and she reached between them to unbutton her skirt. The rfft of the skirt’s zipper followed, mingling with their heavy breathing, until it pooled around her feet. Turning her back on him, she reached behind to unsnap her bra, but he pressed himself against her back, his lips moving over the skin of her shoulders to her spine, before working his way down. The sensual feel of his mouth made goose bumps that had nothing to do with being cold rise on her arms. His teeth nipped at the top of her lacy panties, and she sighed as his big hands slid them down, her eyes closing as his touch brought so many memories to the surface. He’d been this gentle the first time they’d made love, in a little cabin in Stanley, Idaho, when love had been the driving force behind their desire.
Now, she was afraid to look too closely at her reasons. She had been lonely, that was true, and she still had strong feelings for Travis, but the way his touch could chase away all reason was a gift only he possessed. No other man could make her crave him so badly that she was willing to do almost anything to be with him.
The panties hooked on her ankles, and as she lifted one foot and then the other, Travis used his hands to turn her around to face him. Clothed only in her purple bra, she swallowed hard as she met his gaze, the hunger in his eyes causing a supercharged need to race through her, and she wished briefly that he didn’t affect her so.
“Beautiful.” He pressed his lips against her stomach, and butterflies erupted within, fluttering at his heartfelt words. Travis had always called her beautiful, even when she’d felt less than, and his words caused a lump in her throat that she tried to choke down. This wasn’t supposed to be about emotion; it was just sex. She needed to stop blending the past with the present. They weren’t the same people they once were.
As his hands slipped behind her to play with the clasp of her bra, she bit her lip as her breasts spilled out. He pulled down the bra, flinging it away as his eyes locked on her breasts, the hungry stare shooting a whiplash of desire through her.
He stood up quickly, and the slow simmer that had been brewing boiled over as she reached up to grab the back of his neck to bring his mouth back to hers. She felt his hands grab her ass and lift her up, and she locked her legs around his waist, moaning loudly as the sensitive flesh between her legs rested against the top of his jeans. When his mouth latched onto her nipple, the ache within her grew unbearable. Whimpering at each pull of his lips and teeth, she squirmed against him.
God, yes. It’s been so long.
Without warning, he released her breast and dropped her onto the bed, removing her hands from around his neck as he stepped back. He gripped the snap of his jeans, and she watched in anticipation as in one motion he grabbed them and his briefs, shoving them to the floor.
His long, muscular legs, which looked so damn hot in a pair of jeans, were hard and sprinkled with hair, and met his lean hips smoothly. When her eyes fell on the length of his stiff cock, her mouth watered, and she reached out, circling his erection with her hand and squeezing him. His breath rushed out in a deep, growling sound, and she smiled. She wanted to draw out the pleasure for as long as possible with this man, wanted to take the memory of his heavy-lidded blue eyes and the way he groaned as she stroked him with her when it was over.
He brushed her hand off him to crawl onto the bed, and she let him go long enough to push him onto his back and kiss him, her hair falling around his face like a brown curtain. Kissing Travis was like licking raw cookie dough off the spoon; it might be bad for her, but it was too delicious to care.
Breaking the kiss, her mouth trailed down over his prickly jaw to his neck, relishing the salty taste of him. Gracie once had broken up with a guy because he sweat too much, but the light sheen on Travis’s skin was sexy as hell in Gemma’s opinion. It meant he was holding back, getting hot from all the little things they’d done, and for Gemma, it was a huge turn-on. When she reached his flat brown nipple, she took it between her lips and sucked, her hand drifting down to grasp his cock again, teasing it with her teeth when his fingers slipped into her hair once more. The wet heat of arousal between her legs made her clench her thighs together as she released his nipple and continued across the contours of his stomach, turning her body so she leaned over him.
His hand drifted up between her legs and she opened them to him, sighing against his stomach as his fingers sought her core. They past her folds and she tried to concentrate on where her mouth was headed, but when he thrust a finger inside, her breath hitched. Her eyes closed briefly as he added another, his thumb moving higher to tease her *, and she moaned as electrical currents raced through her veins with each press of his hand.
“Oh . . . my,” she said breathlessly as her muscles tightened and her heartbeat thundered in her ears. There was something about the right man’s touch that not even a vibrator could compete with.
The right man’s touch.
Her eyes popped open at the thought, but before it caused panic to override the sensations he was creating, he hooked his fingers over the rough patch of flesh inside her and she exploded, pushing back against his hand as she rode the orgasm, the throbbing easing slightly as he removed his fingers from inside, only to glide up her slit to play with her *, and she jerked as he rubbed the sensitive nub.
He was making her crazy and he knew it, she could tell by the way he whispered, “Come here.”
But she wasn’t done with him, and it was her turn to make him lose it. She shifted down his body until her mouth settled over his cock, satisfied to hear him groan as she took him deeper. She had loved doing this to Travis, loved the feel of him in her mouth, and how out of control it made him. It had been a heady, powerful feeling for her as a teenager, but as a woman, it was even better.
“God, Gemma, stop,” Travis cried, removing his hand from her, and she protested briefly as he jerked her up. Suddenly, the room spun, and she was on her back, looking up into Travis’s passion-filled face, and her heart was in her throat as for a split second she realized that this was it. She was about to make love to a man she used to love but hardly knew anymore. A man who had probably been with scores of women.
His mouth covered hers and her hands gripped his shoulders, holding tight as the tip of him butted against her. In a moment of panic, she pulled away and whispered, “Condom.”
She had an IUD but it never hurt to be safe. While Travis slipped off the bed and grabbed his pants, Gemma could feel the voice of reason screaming.
If I do this, I can’t take it back.
She was a terrible, selfish person and, in a way, wasn’t she taking advantage of Travis? She was using him to satisfy an itch she hadn’t scratched because she’d been worried about rumors spreading, but considering who was currently standing naked by the bed, wasn’t this worse than hooking up with a stranger?
No one ever has to know. I can tell Gracie and Mike about lunch, but this will just be mine. My little secret.
Then Travis was back, and as his big body slid over her, his cock nestling between her legs, she forgot why she shouldn’t do this and bent her knees. As he sank into her, stretching the tight walls of her channel, Gemma held on, rocking with him as his cock moved inside her. The tips of her breasts rubbed against his chest hair and the tingles spread, increasing the pleasure washing over her. Heavy pressure built as he stroked her and shifted his position slightly, pulling out until only the tip remained. She held on tight, trying to bring him back to her; the closeness of Travis’s body on hers, the way he cocooned her with his arms, was comforting, and she didn’t want to lose his warmth.
He dropped his mouth to hers, the gentle sweep of his lips a direct contrast to the way he slammed back into her fast, but there was no pain. As her muscles gripped him, she screamed against his mouth, and the fireworks behind her closed eyelids exploded into gorgeous lights. Her fingers dug into his arms as he rode her hard, and she felt his rhythm slip when he tore his mouth from hers, letting go with a groan.
Her body still humming, Gemma’s hands drifted over Travis’s shoulders, and she tried to tell herself that it was totally worth whatever guilt might hit her later.
TRAVIS HELD GEMMA against his side, her soft brown hair tickling his chest. He was afraid to move or speak, worried that if he broke the mood, she’d kick him out and run. He got the feeling she was still holding out on him, keeping secrets. But as frustrating as it was, she didn’t owe him anything.
His hand drifted over her back as he thought about their lovemaking, a mix of gentleness and fire. It had taken him back, making him compare the fast, frantic quickies in his truck to the gentleness of their first time. This had been more desperate, and he knew that although he never lacked women who wanted him, true passion had been lacking in his life.
Or maybe it’s just Gemma I was missing.
He couldn’t dwell on that thought, not so soon. He needed to take things one day at a time, starting with today. She was still holding back a part of herself, he could feel it, and he knew if he pushed, she’d close down. Gemma had never been one for confrontation.
Maybe if he suggested a way for them to take things slow, get to know each other again . . . He had a few weeks off before his tour picked up again and no reason to head back to Nashville. Maybe he could head up to Rock Canyon, see how things had changed, not just with Gemma, but with the only place he’d ever called home.
“Travis? Travis, are you asleep?”
Gemma’s question broke into his thoughts, and he kissed the top of her head. “No, just thinking.”
“Hmmm, me, too,” she said, her finger making little patterns on his chest.
“Anything I should be worried about?” he asked, praying she’d say no.
“No. Actually, I’m thinking if I’m going to go downstairs, I should probably get into the shower.”
Travis turned his head to look at the clock and knew she was right but was loath to release her. “Want some company?”
Her body shook with laughter. “Yes, but I’m afraid if I let you join me, I’ll never make it in time.”
His chest rose with a sigh. “You’re probably right. Besides, I’m supposed to go over some things with my manager this afternoon.”
“Ah, Big George. How is he?”
Big George had visited her dad’s morning show, and she had apparently charmed the old boy so much, he’d been willing to listen to a demo of Travis’s music that she’d snuck out of his room. When Big George had showed up at Buck’s and approached him after his set, Travis had been floored but flattered. And when he’d realized what Gemma had done, he’d discovered exactly how lucky he was to have found her.
“I keep losing you,” Gemma whispered, and he jerked out of his musings.
“What?”
“I asked how Big George was and suddenly you were a million miles away,” she said, sitting up.
He opened his mouth to answer, but her phone started ringing. Before he could stop her, she was off the bed, leaping across the room to her purse. Admiring the sight, he smiled.
She looked at her caller ID. “I need to take this in the other room.”
She disappeared into the bathroom, and his mind clouded with suspicion. She’d said she wasn’t seeing anyone, but she could have lied. Or maybe it wasn’t that serious, and she didn’t want to mention it.
Or maybe what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas?
Travis stood up and retrieved his clothes, dressing as he contemplated exactly what he was doing with Gemma. He was tired of the bullshit; he’d always wanted to settle down and have a family, something he had missed out on growing up. He wondered, not for the first time, if Gemma and he would have made it if Emily had never pulled that crap ten years ago.
Stop living in the past and try not to overthink this. Just see where things go.
Travis pulled his T-shirt over his head and went to knock on the bathroom door but paused for a moment. Leaning his head against the wood, he strained to hear her conversation.
“I love you. See you soon. ’Bye.”
Travis backed away from the door and waited for the shower to turn on, wondering who the I love you had been for.
None of my business. It could have been her mom.
Funny how the reassurance didn’t stop a worm of jealousy from wiggling around in his brain. Logically, he knew Gemma owed him nothing, but it didn’t mean this didn’t bother him.
PREOCCUPIED, GEMMA STEPPED out of the shower and wrapped up her hair in a towel.
Charlie had called to say good night and that he was having a great time, but there had been a note in his voice she’d recognized. Something was going on, but he didn’t want her to worry or, worse, take care of the problem. Michael was constantly telling her that she needed to let Charlie fight his own battles, but it was hard to step back. He was only nine and she was supposed to protect him, to keep him safe. Which made what she was doing with Travis so much worse.
Just one weekend that’s for me in ten years doesn’t make me a bad mom.
Once she left for home tomorrow, Travis would be out of her life again and back to his. She had planned to keep their little tryst to herself, but could she do it? Could she just go home and pretend nothing had happened? And if she went with him to this event, how was she going to spend the evening continuing to keep a tight lid on her emotions and hiding the details of her life?
Because otherwise I’ll be wrecking three lives that work fine just the way they are.
If she were going to tell Travis about Charlie, she should have done it ten years ago, despite what she’d thought was going on between him and the blonde in his trailer.
Closing her eyes, she drifted back to that night, and her stomach roiled with pain.
“Travis, aren’t you going to introduce me to your friend?” the woman had asked, her tone sweet as honey but with a bitter aftertaste.
Gemma had pulled away from Travis and run. She’d almost made it to the gate before he caught her and spun her around.
“Let me go,” she’d cried, swinging her arm. Her hand had connected with his cheek and he’d grabbed her shoulders, shaking her gently until her gaze met his.
“Gemma! Nothing happened. I walked into my tour bus and found her like that. I was telling her to leave when you arrived.”
Did he think she was an idiot? Sobs choking her, she couldn’t even speak. His grip had loosened and he’d rubbed her arms, trying to comfort her. “I swear, there hasn’t been anybody else.”
Even if that was true, she knew eventually there would be. Who were they kidding? He was going to spend over half the year on the road, with beautiful girls coming on to him left and right. Eventually he was going to give in to temptation. In time, he would leave her anyway . . .
What about the baby?
If she told him now, would he quit? Would he come back to Rock Canyon and get a job at one of the dairies? He’d be miserable and would probably hate her for it. Music was all Travis had talked about since the minute she’d met him. If she told him now, he’d give up his dream. And eventually resent her and the baby.
“It’s over, Travis.” Her voice had been shaky but firm.
“What?”
She’d felt sick at the hurt in his eyes but knew it was for the best. “I said it’s over, Travis. I’m setting you free.”
“I don’t want to be free. I just want you,” he’d pleaded, and she’d hated it, knowing what it had cost him. Travis didn’t beg anyone for anything.
“We’re headed in different directions, so why not just end it before something really bad happens?”
They’d stood there for what felt like hours, her waiting on pins and needles for him to say something, anything to change her mind, but instead, all he’d said was, “Okay.”
Gemma opened her eyes, staring at her reflection, demons warring inside her as she remembered walking away from him. She had cried all the way back to the airport, praying he would come after her, but he never had. The first few months, she knew he’d asked Mike about her, until she’d told Mike to stop answering him. There had been times over the years when she’d been tempted to call him to tell him about Charlie. But once she’d made a mental list of pros and cons, she’d always changed her mind.
In fact, the day Charlie was born, she’d called his cell from the hospital but hung up when he answered. By that time Travis already had two hit singles and was on his way to the top. It wouldn’t have been fair.
Then she’d kept her eye on his career over the years. The tabloids had adored him for the fodder he gave: new girl every week, raging hotel parties that cost him thousands of dollars, and that was just in his early days. When they began calling him “The Hell-Raiser of Country Music,” she’d known she had made the right decision. Charlie didn’t need to be associated with that type of life.
Taking the towel off her head, she wrapped it around her body and left the bathroom. She found Travis sitting on the edge of the bed, his elbows on his knees. He glanced up when he saw her and smiled.
“You’re running out of time, Cinderella.”
Heart pounding, she opened her mouth to start telling him about her doubts. The reasons why they shouldn’t do this. But his hand snaked out and grabbed her before she could form the words, pulling her into the space between his legs as he looked up at her.
“My Gem.” His glance was so tender it stole her breath and her heart all over again.
She didn’t argue, couldn’t really. No matter the distance or the obstacles they had faced, Travis had always been on her mind; she had just hoped her feelings would fade with time. They hadn’t, obviously, but it didn’t matter now. There had never been a real future with Travis, and despite her own desires, Charlie was more important. His happiness and normalcy meant more than fleeting desire and an old flame that had never stopped burning.
But while she was here, in this moment, she could take away a little something for herself, couldn’t she?
Her arms slipped over his shoulders and she tried not to think about anything beyond Travis’s hands stroking her back and the kisses raining along the skin above the towel. For just a little while, she didn’t want to be responsible, levelheaded Gemma Carlson. She wanted to be Gem again.
“Gemma, I want you. I want this and more. Do you understand?” he asked, his eyes lifting again to meet hers. Her vision blurred and she tried to turn away, but he caught her chin with his thumb and forefinger.
“Gem, look at me.” When she did, his hand brushed her cheek, wiping away the tears. “This is nothing to cry over. Those SPCA commercials are something to cry over, but us?” She gave a little smile, he kissed her.
They sat there for the longest time, their soft breathing and the meeting of their lips the only sounds in the silence.
When he finally pulled back, he said, “Getting a second chance with you is something I don’t want to just give up on. I didn’t fight for you before, but I’m in this now. I want you. I hope you can keep an open mind and give me a chance.”
“You don’t even know who I am anymore,” she said softly.
“I’d like to remedy that, if you’re willing,” he said, brushing his mouth over hers. “What do you say? One more chance?”